Careful What You Wish For
by Eyes of Topaz
Summary: SEQUEL TO A Different Kind of Moon. Fifteen years have passed since the fateful day that Angela Cullen formerly Weber was turned. Follow her story as she recounts her adjustments to her new life as a vampire as well as a member of the Cullens!
1. Prologue

**_A/N - First of all, yes this is the prologue that I shared at the end of "A Different Kind of Moon." I apologize if I got anyone's hopes up that I was posting the first chapter, but I did want to get my profile created for this new story so I could post as soon as possible._**

**_Chapter 1 is with my wonderful beta, changedbyEdward, as I write this and I hope to have it posted as soon as possible, so please stay tuned!_**

**_For those of you taking a peek even though you haven't read ADKOM, Welcome! Although I would love to have you read this story, it would probably be best if you read ADKOM first, just so this all makes sense! _**

**_...and to all of you who have followed from the original story, THANK YOU! Your kind words of encouragement and support as I wrote ADKOM gave this fledgling writer some confidence to continue - and I will be forever grateful. Love to you all! xoxo_**

* * *

_Memories, pressed between the pages of my mind_  
_Memories, sweetened through the ages just like wine_

_Quiet thought come floating down_  
_And settle softly to the ground_  
_Like golden autumn leaves around my feet_  
_I touched them and they burst apart with sweet memories_  
_Sweet Memories_

_- Elvis Presley-_

I have been told that human memories are difficult to hold on to for a vampire – more like snapshots of our life before the burn. Some of us are luckier than others, carrying more mementos from our previous existence, while the less fortunate of our kind have little if any recollection of the time when their heart was still beating, their blood still flowed.

I guess I am luckier than most. I remember that I had family and friends who cared for me. I remember that I had parents that cherished me and were proud of my accomplishments. I remember that there was a boy who loved me, held my hand and gave me my first kiss. I hope those snapshots will stay with me.

I find it funny however, that my most vivid memory is not of any of those people. The photograph most clear is that of a shy, sweet girl on her first day of school. A girl who would become my best friend, my confidante and finally my eternal sister – Bella.

I remember her face as she watched them arrive in the cafeteria, our dear friend Jessica providing the play-by-play as first Rosalie and Emmett, then Alice and Jasper, and finally Edward entered. I believe Bella fell in love with Edward at that very moment, sealing both our fates in that one instant.

The conversations that happened that day are like whispers on the air, and I fight to capture them as they escape me. All but one. The words echo in my head over and over and will most likely haunt me for the rest of my days.

"Dr. Cullen is like this foster Dad, slash matchmaker," Jessica joked.

"Maybe he'll adopt me." A passing fancy spoken aloud, never meaning any harm.

Be careful what you wish for.

My name is Angela Cullen and I am a vampire. This is my story.

* * *

_**More coming soon, I promise!**_


	2. By Myself

_**A/N - Big hugs and lots of love to all of you who jumped the minute I posted the prologue again...it brought a huge smile to this girl's face!**_

_**Love and respect to my beta-extraordinaire who makes my words prettier and finds me outstanding lyrics when I am drawing a blank...big hugs bb!**_

_**Y'all can follow me on twitter if ya like... eyes_of_topaz **_

_**Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.**_

_**And away we go! **_

* * *

___What do I do to ignore them behind me?_

_Do I follow my instincts blindly?_

_Do I hide my pride from these bad dreams?_

_And give in to sad thoughts that are maddening?_

_Do I sit here and try to stand it?_

_Or do I try to catch them red-handed?_

_Do I trust some and get fooled by phoniness,_

_Or do I trust nobody and live in loneliness?_

_Because I can't hold on when I'm stretched so thin_

_I make the right moves but I'm lost within_

_I put on my daily facade but then_

_I just end up getting hurt again_

_By myself [myself]_

_-Linkin Park-_

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

_The passing of time to a vampire is inconsequential. For humans every hour, every week, every year that passes means something; whether it's a deadline missed, the build-up to a long-anticipated vacation or the amount of time left before retirement._

_But for me, and any other vampire, the passing of time means nothing. I will never grow older, never know what it means to wrinkle or turn grey or lose my faculties. I am frozen at eighteen forever._ Pausing, I re-read the words on the screen and sighed heavily.

Pushing away from my laptop, I stared out the window at the lush green hills of the highlands before me. It was good to be back in Scotland again. It had been the obvious choice for me when I graduated and although Carlisle and Esme had been sad to see me go, they had understood that I needed some time on my own.

I had promised that I would not stay away too long and I had mentally set Christmas as my return date, knowing the rest of the "family" planned to return to the nest at the same time. Alice had thought we should celebrate in Alaska this year and had already been in discussion with the Denalis for our upcoming return north.

Although I relished the thought of freedom, it didn't mean that I did not miss my 'siblings' terribly. It was the first time since my change that I had enough confidence to be on my own, with no one there to rein me in should I lose control. The thought was daunting, but one that I welcomed. I needed to prove to myself that I could make it on my own. Not that I planned to separate myself from my loved ones on a permanent basis, but I did want to experience independence – something I never accomplished as a human.

One of the many things I never had the opportunity to experience.

Sighing again, I moved back to the laptop, determined to get some of my thoughts down. Alice and Bella had both attempted several times to convince me that there would come a time that I would want to remember my human life. I balked, not wanting to recall what or how it had all been stolen from me. But now, as I struggled to hold onto the fading memories of my loved ones, I knew that they had been right all along.

Recording my memories shouldn't have been difficult. Writing had always been a passion for me and even now I toyed with the idea of publishing a novel – yet another reason I had opted to set out on my own for a bit. But writing fiction and recording my own personal history were two very different entities and I wondered if it was really worth the struggle.

I sat staring at the blinking cursor on the screen, waiting for inspiration. The theme from 'Dark Shadows' chimed from my pocket and I grinned at the sound.

"_Saved by the bell!"_ I giggled to myself as I answered the call. "Hello, _Dad_."

A light chuckle echoed in my ear and I smiled, knowing I had made his day. Even though we all looked to him for advice and support, it always seemed to please him when one of us actually called him by a fatherly pet name.

"Greetings, Daughter." Another chuckle. "Esme and I just wanted to make sure you survived your trip."

"You mean you wanted to confirm that the rest of the passengers survived the trip, don't you?" I quipped.

"You know I have the utmost faith in you, Angela." Carlisle scolded gently. "How is bonny Scotland?"

"Beautiful as always. And I am happy to report that I survived the flight and all passengers were breathing and accounted for when we landed. I had no problems making it to the house; everything is just as we left it."

"Good to hear. I won't keep you as I know you must want to get settled in, but we just wanted to be sure everything was good. We miss you."

I smiled into the phone. "I miss you both as well and I promise to keep in touch. Thanks for calling, Carlisle."

"If you need us Angel, just call, alright?" The sound of his pet name for me brought on a subtle wave of homesickness, but I pushed it back and ended the call with a soft goodbye. Pocketing my phone, I made my way to the window again, peering out into the fading daylight. I watched the sun slowly make its dip below the hills and decided that it would be best to head out to hunt even though I really didn't need to feed. I had made sure to gorge myself before the flight so that there would be no temptation to drain my travel mates, however I didn't want to fall out of the routine I had set myself. I have survived enough close calls over the years to know that once you started leaving the hunt too long, it becomes easier and easier to make excuses not to go. By the time you realize your error, you are almost too far gone and ravenous for blood – human blood.

* * *

I lay back in the grass, fully sated and stared into the sky, counting the stars as they twinkled down on me. I breathed in deeply, relaxing as the sweet essence of heather filled my senses. Drifting back I recalled the countless times I found myself in this very same spot during my first year as a vampire.

I had been so angry and lost as a newborn, lashing out at those I now hold dearest – I still wonder why they even bothered putting up with me for as long as they did - especially Jasper. Poor Jasper, he spent more time than anyone else dealing with me. When he wasn't overcome with anger and hostility himself from my projected emotions, he was working with me, trying his best to help me cope with my new reality.

I remember the first time he brought me out here at night. It had been a particularly difficult couple of days and I was completely out of control emotionally. Not even thinking, I had ventured out into the garage to let out my frustration, not caring about anything or anyone. My first mistake had been entering Rosalie's sanctuary in the first place. However the screwdriver carving that destroyed the custom paint job on the '68 L88 corvette she had been restoring had pushed Rosalie to the brink of ripping me apart and Jasper knew that if he didn't do something, I would be nothing more than purple smoke and a memory. Tackling me from behind, he hauled me out here in a headlock, warning the rest of the family to stay away.

I chuckled as I remembered the look on Rosalie's face as he dragged me away; I truly believe she would have destroyed me if he hadn't made a move. It was easy to laugh now, but it had taken a long time for me to make things up to Rose and she still brought it up on occasion to torment me.

I remember hoping that I had finally pushed Jasper hard enough that he would end my misery. Although I didn't let on that I cared about any of them, I did know some of Jasper's history and his time with his maker, Maria. His story had struck a chord with me, knowing that he was a tortured soul. I felt a kinship with him, not that my life as a newborn had been anything like his, but the horrible memories I did hold of my final days felt similar in a way.

I remember struggling against his iron grip, my anguish and anger growing with each step we took…

"_Darlin', you will not get away from me so you may as well stop your squirming and behave." His Texan drawl was soft as he sent waves of calm at me. His gift is a remarkable one and by the time we had reached our destination, I felt like an exhausted newborn kitten. He lay me down in this very spot, claiming a seat beside me and began to talk, telling me stories from his days with Maria, his escape with his friends, Peter and Charlotte, his finding Alice and finally his early years with the Cullens._

_As his stories progressed, I saw what he was trying to explain – the progression of his life from one which he hated to present. Although his bloodlust was still a daily fight for him, he took pride in the changes he had made and the things he had accomplished. He was, for the most part, at peace._

"_Darlin', you see those stars above us?" I watched as Jasper pointed overhead to the stream of twinkling lights. I nodded, wondering where he was going with it. "Whenever I am particularly troubled or feel myself slipping, I find myself a quiet spot like this." He turned on his side and I mimicked his movements. "As vampires, Angela, it is quite easy to make ourselves believe we are not accountable for our actions and when that begins to happen, mistakes are made."_

"_How do you keep yourself accountable, Jazz?"_

"_By doing this. I like to think that those stars above are actually loved ones from my past, watching down on me, urging me to make the right choices and forgiving me when I don't. _

_I know you did not want this life, darlin', and I also know that Edward lives with the regret of the choice he made each and every day because of how you feel. But the thing is, it happened, so you need to make the best of the situation." He sat up, pulling a piece of grass and rolling it between his fingers._

"_I don't know how." It was barely a whisper, but I knew he would hear me._

"_Let us in, Ang, let us love you and be a family to you. If you can find it in yourself to let go of the horrible things that happened at the end of your human life, I think you will see that we are not the monsters that Mike and Victoria were."_

"_I don't think that, Jazz! I understand the difference, but I'm afraid…" _

"_Of what, darlin'?"_

"_That I could be one of those monsters." My hands clenched tightly at the grass as I fought to control the terror inside. My body relaxed and I smiled at Jasper, conveying my thanks for once again coming to my aid._

"_Angela. You are not like Victoria or Mike Newton."_

_"How do you know that, Jasper? How can you be sure that I won't escape and wreak havoc in the closest town, murdering and drinking the blood of anyone or anything I can lay my hands on? How do you know I won't do that?" My voice rose with each question I asked._

"_Well first, darlin', you would need to get past the eight of us and we have mad skills." He grinned as I tossed grass in his face. "And second, I know you won't, because I remember the girl you were. We all do. The Angela I knew would never hurt anyone and would go out of her way to help anyone who needed it. She was intelligent and thoughtful and kind-hearted. That same girl is sitting here, right beside me, albeit a lot less fragile and a lot feistier, but you are still you, Ang. You just have to find your way back to her."_

I smiled at the memory, his words still warming my soul. I would love to be able to say that everything turned at that moment for me, but unfortunately it took me a lot longer to find the girl he talked about than one heart to heart. However, I would like to think that I was a bit easier to get along with after that discussion.

Sighing, I stood and dusted the grass from the back of my jeans and made my way back towards the house, taking my time to enjoy the late night air and sounds of the forest behind me. If Jasper taught me only one thing that night, it was how the elements around me could balance my actions. As long as I could find a way to relax and appreciate my environment, I would be able to hold myself accountable; keep myself in check. That was what this trip alone was really about. For so long I had gone through the motions and been successful, but always with a safety net. Those eight people with "the mad skills" were always there to catch me if I slipped; and I loved them dearly for it.

But if I was ever going to be able to truly embrace this way of life, rather than just go through the motions, I needed to prove to myself that I could stand on my own. It was the only way I would survive.

* * *

_**(Carlisle's POV)**_

"She will be alright, love." I pressed my lips to Esme's forehead and pulled her close. "You worry too much."

"You say that to appease me, Carlisle, but I know that you are just as worried about her as I am."

I smiled and pressed my finger gently to her nose. "I thought that Jasper was the only empath in the family." I fought back a chuckle as she raised her eyebrow at me. "You are right, of course, my darling. I _am_ worried about her, but I also want to give her this chance. If we do not respect her wishes, we could push her away and we both know from previous experience that does not turn out well."

Esme sighed and I hugged her close again as she recalled the few years that Edward had run from us. Although it had not been exactly the same circumstances, we both knew what the end result had been and it was a guilt we both carried, even after all this time. "But now he has Bella," she whispered, still thrilled that Edward had found his peace at last.

I nodded, although it tore at me that Angela now was in a similar boat. I believed it was part of the reason she had wanted some time alone – it couldn't be easy being single in a house full of couples. The only thing that had made it worse for Edward was his ability to read our thoughts – he was never able to escape from us even though we all tried to shield those thoughts from him whenever we were able.

"You have gone very quiet, love." Esme pulled me from my thoughts.

I kissed her gently and moved to the couch, pulling her into my lap. "Alice knows that Angela is on her own and will keep an eye out for any problems that could arise. For now, we must give her what she has asked for."

Esme nodded, burying her face in my neck. "I know. I just can't shake this feeling that something is coming. It feels like we are in the calm before the storm, yet I can't imagine what it would be. Perhaps you are right, Carlisle, I am worrying too much."

Cupping her face in my hands, I pressed my lips to hers gently. "I am sure of it love," I whispered, praying I was right.

* * *

_**End of chapter - so are Carlisle and Esme right to be concerned?**_


	3. Broken Wing

_**A/N – Thanks to everyone for the wonderful feedback on the first chapter! Your questions and comments are so appreciated! I know that a few of you did not expect this story to start how it did, but I hope that as it continues to move along – it becomes what you hoped for!**_

_**Lots of love and gratitude to my fab beta and lyric girl, changedbyEdward for not killing me over the multiple versions of this chap! MWAH bb! **_

_**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight world. No copyright infringement intended.**_

* * *

_If you had not have fallen  
then I would not have found you  
Angel flying too close to the ground  
I patched up your broken wing and hung around for a while  
trying to keep your spirits up and your fever down  
So leave me if you need to, I will still remember  
Angel flying too close to the ground._

I knew someday that you would fly away  
for love's the greatest healer to be found  
So leave me if you need to, I will still remember  
Angel flying too close to the ground

Fly on fly on past, the speed of sound  
I'd rather see you up than see you down  
So leave me if you need to, I will still remember  
Angel flying too close to the ground.

_- Willie Nelson -_

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

It took several tries before I finally sat myself down and began to write again. Between settling in, renewing acquaintances with our human caretakers, phone calls from various family members checking on me, hunting, and my own sheer laziness, I realized that I had been avoiding my project for several days. Not that it really mattered, as I had no plans to share this with anyone – it was a purely therapeutic endeavour.

It wasn't as if I hadn't thought about it at all though – I had made one decision concerning the task that lay at hand. If I was going to record my, albeit brief, history as a vampire, I would do it in its entirety. That meant from the beginning – even the darkest days in the beginning that I would give just about anything to forget. Unfortunately a vampire has perfect recollection so that was not likely to happen.

Staring at the blank screen for only a few moments, I rested my fingers on the keys and allowed myself to drift into the past…

_My first coherent thought in what seemed an eternity was one of relief when I assumed that the end had finally come and I was at peace at last. The scorching lava that had been coursing through my veins had ceased and my entire body felt as light as a feather. I had always wondered what it would be like to be an angel and I was finally going to get my answer, assuming of course that I had met all the requirements and not been sent in the other direction. Would I have wings? Would I be dressed in glowing robes of white and gold? Would I carry a harp and sing?_

_Fantasies of my angelic future were all too soon interrupted by bell-like voices whispering softly to one another. Anxious to meet whomever had come to greet me in my afterlife, my eyes fluttered open and I gasped in wonder as I watched thousands of colours dance against my skin in the sunlight. _

"_Angela?" I heard my name and turned towards the direction it came from, only to find several pairs of golden eyes looking back at me curiously. In an instant, I found myself crouched in a corner, my arms raised defensively and a snarling growl emanating deep from within my chest._

_The voice spoke again. "Angela, it's alright. You are safe. We won't hurt you." _

_A rustle of movement and echoes of whispered conversation brought about another growl from my being. A sinking feeling came over me as I realized how unlikely it would be for an angel to growl. Unsure of what or where I was, I lowered my arms and glared sullenly towards the man who had spoken to me. _

_Warm butterscotch eyes watched me cautiously as he raised his hands to show me he meant no harm. I continued to watch him silently as he moved towards me slowly. I realized at once that he and I were now the only two in the room and I relaxed a little._

"_How are you feeling, Angela?" His voice was soothing and warm and oddly familiar. I studied him carefully, taking in his classic attire and how boyishly handsome he was. Golden blonde hair and chiselled cheeks, he truly was exquisite and so very familiar. A flash of memory came to me – a visit to the hospital for a broken arm. He was a doctor. Perhaps I wasn't dead after all? Dr. Cullen had saved me?_

"_Dr. Cullen?" I asked quietly, immediately stunned to silence as I heard the same chiming melody from my lips that had been whispering in the room only moments before._

_Sensing my alarm, he stopped short of where I still sat crouched. Extending his hand to me, he waited as I looked around for an escape route. "Angela, I promise that no harm will come to you. Please let me explain." _

_Sighing, I moved to take his hand only to realize that I had not been breathing in all the time I had been awake. Bewildered, I flew towards him, shoving him against a wall, the plaster cracking and falling to the ground around him. In an instant, I was pinned to the floor, held down by several arms._

"_Relax Angela; no one is going to hurt you." A familiar feminine voice spoke to me softly and although I tried to see where it was coming from, my view was blocked by my captors. Snarling and snapping sounds escaped as I struggled against their hold, almost gaining release._

"_She didn't mean to hurt me. Jasper, Emmett, please let her stand." Dr. Cullen's voice was still soft, yet full of authority. I stopped struggling as the arms that held me brought me upright, still holding me in place._

"_Carlisle, you can't trust newborns." I turned my head to face the southern drawl and gasped as I took in the many small crescent scars that covered the skin of the man that stood next to me. Jasper. Alice's Jasper. My head whipped to the other side and I recognized Emmett's giant mitts for hands before I actually saw the cautious grin that fought to make its appearance on his face._

_I relaxed in their grip, although I felt anything but that way. Looking up at Dr. Cullen, I found him watching me pensively. I couldn't help but feel that I was somewhat safe in his presence and instantly regretted throwing him into the wall, even though I was still completely baffled at how I had done it._

_Finding my voice, I whispered an apology and waited for a reaction. Carlisle moved closer and motioned for Jasper and Emmett to release me. I sensed their hesitance, but was grateful when they led me to a chair and allowed me to sit. I knew they still stood behind me, ready to tackle me again if required, but at least I did not feel so restrained._

"_Angela, I understand that you must have a hundred questions for me, but if I could ask you to be patient for a few more moments, I would like to ask a few things of you first." _

_I nodded in agreement and calmed as he smiled in response._

"_You have been through quite an ordeal, my dear. I know that you recognize me. Do you remember Jasper and Emmett?"_

_I nodded again._

"_Do you recall anything from the past few days, Angela?" I studied his face as he waited for me to answer. Not finding any reason not to respond, I finally spoke._

"_I remember being in an extreme amount of pain. I felt as if I was burning alive." He nodded sadly and I continued. "There was an angel. I could feel her with me, holding me and trying to calm me."_

_Carlisle's face brightened significantly. "Yes, she is an angel of sorts, Angela. That was my wife, Esme. It will please her greatly that she was able to comfort you some."_

_I smiled apprehensively in response. "She really did. I would like to thank her if possible?"_

"_You already have child, but she will be in later to check on you. Do you remember anything before that?" _

_I could see the worry return to his eyes and I breathed in quickly, once again realizing that I had been without breath for quite some time. "What has happened to me, Dr. Cullen? Why am I not breathing?" I felt panic and tensed but then immediately relaxed again. _

_Catching a glance between Dr. Cullen and someone behind me, I whirled quickly, but not before Jasper and Emmett both had a hold of me. "What is going on and what are you doing to me?"_

"_Relax darlin', I mean you no harm." Jasper smiled gently even though his eyes remained guarded and his grip tight. He turned his attention elsewhere. "Carlisle, perhaps it would be best if we tell Angela what she needs to know now and fill her in on the details later? I am sure she must be…thirsty."_

_I hadn't really considered sustenance until that moment, but with his words I immediately realized that my throat was so dry it burned. I nodded in response. "I am feeling that way yes, but if I could have a bit of water I am sure I will be fine to continue."_

_I heard Emmett stifle a snicker and saw Carlisle grimace at him. As I was about to ask what was so funny, I heard a quick knock at the door and watched as Alice, looking more like a beautiful pixie than ever before, dance into the room._

_Smiling at me, she turned to face Carlisle. "You need to tell her now, before she finds out on her own." Turning back towards me, she was beside me in an instant, wrapping her willowy arms around me in a fierce hug. Stunned, I responded without thinking and hugged her back._

"_Everything will be alright, Angela. I know you're confused, but I promise it will all work out." She smiled at me brightly and quickly kissed Jasper on the cheek before she pirouetted out of the room as gracefully as she had entered it._

_I was now more confused than ever and the thirst that had only been a dull ache in the back of my throat was becoming more and more difficult to ignore. _

_Sensing my discomfort, Jasper cleared his throat. "Carlisle, we need to tell her."_

_Carlisle nodded, his face clear of all emotion. "Angela, I had hoped that you would remember some of what I have to tell you on your own dear, but unfortunately for your own safety, we can't wait. You were very badly injured when we finally got to you." He paused, waiting for some kind of reaction, but I was unable to give him one. I had no idea what had happened to me or how I had come to be in their company. _

_Carlisle continued softly. "By the time Edward got to you, you had lost a tremendous amount of blood. Your injuries were fatal, my dear."_

_I looked down at my body, clearly seeing that I was far from injured. I had never felt better or stronger. "I don't think I understand, Dr. Cullen."_

"_I'm sure you don't Angela. And there really is no way for me to explain this without causing you distress, but I beg of you to remain calm and keep in mind that we mean you absolutely no harm. You are safe with us."_

_His words were heartfelt, yet I was unable to take any comfort, because I knew what he had to tell me was going to change my life evermore. Something inside of me was gone, broken and forever lost to me..._

I stared at the screen, reading over what I had written. Even now I remembered the horrible sense of loss I felt as Carlisle explained what they were, what I was and what I would need to do to survive. I am not sure how they expected me to react to the news that my life as Angela Weber was over, but my crumpling to the floor, heaving with tearless sobs was not what they had planned for.

I remember strong arms picking me up off the floor and holding me tightly as I mourned all that was lost to me. Soothing words and gentle touches were all around me, yet all I felt was numb. I was numb for a very long time.

Standing, I moved away from the laptop and stared out into the fading light. A sense of calm washed over me and I was thankful yet again that I had returned to this place, my first true home as a vampire. Scotland was home. I think it was because it reminded me of Forks in a way. It was green, damp and earthy and so very soothing. I watched the evening mist drop its sparkling dew on the ground and opened the window, breathing in deeply. Yes, so very much like Forks, yet different with the faint aroma of heather still adding its unique scent to the mixture.

I sat in the window seat, watching the last remnants of the day fall away to the dark night. It was the time of day that I loved the most, yet dreaded as well. Each day that faded away was another that I had spent alone. Most of the time I was able to keep myself busy and not allow myself the opportunity to ponder my lonely existence. It was not something I could afford to let myself wallow in as I knew it would be very difficult to pull myself out of that kind of funk.

Tonight was not one of those nights that I would be able to push away my lonely thoughts. I guess I could blame it on what I had been writing, but deep down I knew it was far more than that. My trip to Scotland had not only been to discover independence, it had been an escape.

I loved my family – they were all I truly cherished in this world, but the happiness that swarmed around the four couples was at times too much to bear. I knew they did their best not to shove it in my face, but sometimes it was just too difficult to ignore that there were four couples plus one.

As I became more comfortable being around humans, Bella and Alice urged me to socialize, mingle with people my age, but I resisted. I would never allow myself to become attached to a human, knowing I would either have to watch them age and eventually die or choose eternal damnation to walk alongside of me. I knew that this was something that Edward had struggled with when he met Bella and I just could not allow myself to fall into that same trap.

Sighing, I pushed away from the window and moved towards the bookshelf. I needed something to clear my head of these lonely thoughts. Smiling, I reached for the tattered copy of one of the many Buffy the Vampire Slayer books we had stockpiled in each and every house we owned. It was childish fluff, but the perfect escape that I required, always being a laugh at how humans pictured the many things that went bump in the night.

Relieved to have found the perfect distraction, I turned off the laptop and settled comfortably into one of the leather recliners, eager to lose myself to Buffy, Willow and the gang.

* * *

_**(Rev. Weber's POV)**_

The clock struck three times and the chimes echoed around the otherwise silent room. I sat in the darkness like so many times before, the small pewter-framed photo clasped tightly in my hands.

And like so many times before, the tears that always came deep in the night when no one else could see fell against the glass, clouding her beautiful face. How many nights had I sat here like this? I had lost count, but knew there had been at least fifteen. One for each year since she had disappeared.

To most people, I was Reverend Weber, a strong, brave man who did not question God or his teachings when the brightest light in my life was taken away. There were a few of course, like my loving wife, who knew some of the torment I felt, but it was something I buried away – at least most of the time.

But on this night which would have been Angela's 33rd birthday, the loss of my daughter was almost too much to bear. It was hard to believe that she had been gone almost as long as I had known her – the years seemed to pass so quickly, yet the pain was still so fierce. Lost, I prayed to God for understanding, for comfort, but still I mourned for her.

Placing the small frame on the desk in front of me, I unlocked and pulled open the drawer of my desk. My hand searched blindly for the cold steel, finding it almost immediately. Tightening my grip, I pulled the small revolver from its hiding place, cradling it in my palm as the tears continued to fall. It was loaded. I knew it was and had been since the night I bought it so long ago.

My body trembled as I turned the pistol in my hands, the cold touch of the metal soothing to my skin. Clicking the safety off, I brought the tip to my forehead, pressing it hard against my skin. My fingers teased at the trigger as I silently tempted the fates to grant me the peace that God had not.

A gentle breeze as light as a whisper moved against my skin and I opened my eyes to find the moonlight reflecting my daughter's silhouette in the frame. Her dark eyes were watching me so lovingly and I knew that once again my wish would be denied.

Switching the safety back on, I placed the gun back in its hiding place and locked the drawer. My hands trembled as I brought the frame to my lips and kissed the forehead of the one I had lost. My body shook, overcome with grief as I dropped my head in my hands and prayed to God once more, begging for forgiveness and freedom from strife.

* * *

_**End of chapter – would love to hear your thoughts on Angela's recollections so far!**_


	4. Learning to Fly

_**A/N - Once again I am humbled by your response to this story so far. I appreciate all your comments and questions! **_

_**Many thanks and much love to my wonderful beta and lyric finder, changedbyEdward - you wouldn't believe how much better she makes my jumble look! **_

_**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight world. No copyright infringement intended.**_

* * *

Well, the good ol' days may not return  
And the rocks might melt and the sea may burn

I'm learning to fly but I ain't got wings  
Coming down is the hardest thing

Well, some say life will beat you down  
Break your heart, steal your crown  
So I've started out for God knows where  
I guess I'll know when I get there

I'm learning to fly around the clouds  
But what goes up must come down

_**- Tom Petty -**_

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

Fully sated and freshly showered, I sat at the dressing table in my bedroom while I combed the wet tangles from my hair. I caught my reflection as I worked and stared into the warm topaz orbs that watched me, recalling the memories of the days when they were deep scarlet. Even now, the recollection chilled me, as this memory automatically triggered others of burgundy eyes that weren't my own.

Satisfied that I had rid myself of knots, I gravitated towards my laptop and settled onto the couch with it to capture my thoughts…

_I had listened in horrified silence as Carlisle relayed to me what I had already known deep in my heart. My cold dead heart. Any angelic fantasies I had hoped for were dashed when he confirmed my deepest fear. I had become what I feared most. God had forsaken me and allowed me to be damned into the same dark eternity my captors had walked._

_Once I had confirmation, his words were lost to me and I curled into a ball on the floor, my hands tight against my head as I fought to block out the bloodcurdling screams I soon realized were coming from me. Arms wrapped around me and I felt a wave of calm wash over me, but I still lay locked inside of myself while I replayed the words 'vampire' and 'immortal' over and over in my head. My body continued to relax as the arms held me tighter and I soon realized another person had entered the room and sat beside me._

_I heard my name being called and I recognized the voice yet didn't. A small hand reached for mine and pulled me into an embrace. The touch was soothing and familiar and I relaxed as she held me close, her gentle whispers of my name and other calming words urging me to return._

"_Angela, everything will be alright. I'll be right here with you all the way." The voice was clearer now and I glanced to my side, taking in the ivory-skinned girl with beautiful, long, chestnut hair that held me. _

"_Bella?" I questioned, finally finding my voice again. I relaxed as she nodded and smiled._

"_Yes, it's me Ang. You're safe. You don't have to be afraid." She stroked my hair as I moved closer to her, grateful to have something familiar to anchor onto finally. "Everything will be alright."_

"_No Bella! It can't be! Nothing will ever be alright again!" I began to tremble as I remembered Carlisle's words. I glanced up to see that we were alone in the room, except for Jasper who stood sentry-like at the door, watching us both with a serious look on his face. Turning back to face her, I gasped in fear when my eyes met hers. Blood red orbs stared back at me and I felt two hands grab my shoulders as I screamed in terror._

_The look of sadness and confusion on Bella's face did nothing to stop the fear that had overtaken me. My dearest friend was one of them - was a monster just like the ones who had stolen me away and cursed me to an eternity of hell._

"_It's your eyes, darlin'." The soft southern drawl spoke to Bella from behind me and I knew I was being restrained by Jasper yet again. I fought against his stone-like grip but it was useless, as my body seemed to turn to jelly in his hands. I fought the exhaustion that had claimed me and dropped into the chair to which I had been guided._

"_Angela" Bella's voice washed over me and I fought to focus on her, terrified to face her, yet unable to stop myself. I looked up at her, only to find a poignant look of understanding in her expression. The scarlet eyes were still there but they were the only hint of similarity between Bella and the monsters I remembered from before._

"_Angela, I know you're scared, but I promise you…I swear to you that we are not like them! You have been through so much Ang, please just let me help you, ok?" Bella moved a step closer to me and then crossed the distance when I nodded hesitantly. I felt Jasper ease his hold on my shoulders and immediately the lethargic feeling that had overtaken my body lessened._

_I turned to face him and he stared back at me, his golden eyes as piercing as Bella's burgundy. "What are you, Jasper? What did you do to me?"_

_I heard Bella chuckle behind me. "Just think of him as walking weed, Ang." I raised my eyebrow in question and Jasper smirked in response._

"_Now Bella darlin', you know that I am far more than that." He looked back at me, his face kinder now, although I knew he was still monitoring me closely. "I'm an empath, Angela."_

"_Meaning?" I wasn't letting it go with a simple label._

"_Meaning, he can control emotions. Jasper has a gift to not only sense and control other people's emotions, but he can also trigger them as well." I stiffened slightly at the new voice in the room and turned towards it. _

"_Edward." I watched as he moved to Bella's side, taking her hand in his._

"_Hello Angela." His soft voice soothed me and I studied him carefully. His caramel eyes were darker than Jasper's, but still not near the color of Bella's. He was breathtaking – even more than I remembered from before and I understood immediately why Bella had been so drawn to him. I noticed a hint of a smirk on his lips as I thought that and immediately had the horrible sense that he knew exactly what I was thinking._

_A chuckle escaped his lips then and I felt my eyes widen in shock as he nodded at me. "Oh my God, you can read my mind?" _

_Bella smacked Edward in the shoulder and he grimaced slightly, his hand rubbing the spot she'd hit. "Don't forget your newborn strength, love."_

"_Oh, trust me, I hadn't." She smiled up at him teasingly and then looked back at me. "Yes, Ang, he can read your thoughts but don't worry about it, because he can read everyone's."_

"_Except yours, Bella" he grinned._

"_Except mine." I stared at her, absolutely mortified. "We have so much to tell you, Ang – I know how confused you must be. But the first thing we need to do is get you fed."_

_With her words, the burn at the back of my throat returned full force, but also the terror of knowing what it meant. I shook my head forcefully. "NO! I won't do it. You can't force me to do it! Please!" I would not take another person's life simply to feed. There was no way I would condemn someone else to this hell._

"_Angela," Edward spoke softly, "we don't drink from humans."_

"_Don't lie to me Edward! I know. I saw. I remember exactly how vampires feed!" My voice echoed around the room and once again, I felt a wave of calm wash over me. Whirling, I faced Jasper. "Stop controlling me!"_

_Jasper simply laughed at my outburst. "I'm afraid you are just gonna have to get used to me for a bit, darlin'. I can't have you flying off the handle or else we'll all be in trouble."_

"_Enough already!" Stunned by yet another new voice in the room, I stepped back only to find myself face to face with yet another familiar character. _

"_Rosalie." Edward spoke her name quickly and forcefully._

"_No, Edward! This is ridiculous!" I gasped as she stared me down, her eyes at first almost black, but softening, as she seemed to sense my trepidation. _

"_We do not drink from humans. Got that?" I nodded, afraid to argue. _

"_Give us some credit, Angela. If we killed people, do you really think we could have gone to school with you for over two years without people disappearing?" She didn't give me a chance to answer. "No, I didn't think so. Now pull yourself together and Emmett and I will take you out to hunt."_

"_Hunt?"_

"_We drink from animals, Angela." Edward spoke again softly. "That is why our eyes are a different color from the ones who took you."_

"_Bella's eyes aren't!" I looked at her horrified only to find her staring at the ground._

"_Neither are yours, Angela. But that is only because you are both new to this life and your human blood still courses through your system. Eventually your eyes will be the same color as ours." Edward wrapped his arm around Bella and she rested her head against his shoulder._

_I had the distinct feeling there was more than they were telling me, but I couldn't help but be relieved to know that I wasn't going to have to kill anyone to survive._

_I looked back at Rosalie, only to find her staring back at me. "Are you ready?"_

_As I nodded, she took my hand and pulled me towards the door. Stopping, she turned back to face her siblings, her arm wrapped around me in a protective yet firm hold. "Are the rest of you nitwits coming or not?" _

Chuckling, I sat back and ran my hands through my hair, pulling it into a tight ponytail. Rosalie. She had seemed tough as nails and cold as ice that day, but she had been there for me without hesitation. We had definitely had our moments through the years – there were times that I could have simply throttled her for some of the things she said or did, but I knew there were also plenty of times she could have done the same.

Sighing, I re-read what I had written and continued.

_My first hunt was an experience I will never forget. Rosalie had led me out of the house where I was at last reunited with the "angel" who had stayed with me through what I now understood was my change from human to vampire. Esme stood silently beside Carlisle, her arm wrapped around him tightly and she appeared to be almost vibrating with happiness. I stared in wonder at her eyes; they simply glowed with affection that appeared to be directed solely at me. _

_Once we were within reach, her hand clasped mine and she pulled me into a fierce hug. I knew at once that no matter how bad things got, this woman would be my beacon in the night. She murmured a welcome to me as she released me from her embrace, her hand coming up to caress my cheek. "I am so glad that you are alright, Angela. You have been through so much."_

"_Thank you, Esme. Thank you for helping me."_

_Smiling again, she settled back against her husband's side. The love between the two of them so apparent that I could feel the warmth of their affection radiating against my skin. _

_I realized the rest of the family had gathered during our brief reunion and I glanced from one couple to another, stunned by their exquisite beauty as a whole. "How on earth had we considered them normal?" I thought to myself as my eyes moved from one face to another._

"_All of your senses are much keener, Angela." Edward answered my unspoken question and I was once again shaken by the thought that he could read my every thought. He grimaced slightly. "I do apologize for seeming so intrusive. Your thoughts are just very jumpy right now so I tend to be more drawn to listening."_

"_You will also learn how to shut him out eventually," Rosalie quipped as she took my hand in hers. "Are you ready?"_

"_I don't know if I will ever be ready, but let's get this over with," I grimaced._

"_Aw kiddo, it won't be that bad. You'll be bagging the big ones with us in no time," Emmett joked as he led us off on the chase. I was simply awestruck as he blurred off into the forest, followed closely by Edward and Bella. _

"_Don't let them show us up, Ang. Run!" Rosalie whispered as she flashed ahead of me. I glanced back once to see Jasper and Alice grin at me as Carlisle and Esme closed up the rear. Sucking in a breath, I took off like a shot, flying over the ground with little or no effort. The exhilaration was indescribable as I ran, the trees and surrounding foliage nothing more than a haze. I laughed aloud as I passed first Rosalie then Bella, tight on the heels of Emmett and Edward and almost barrelling into them as they both stopped suddenly._

_Emmett turned back to me, a Cheshire grin dimpling his face as he pointed to the clearing that lay just to the east of us. Rosalie was at my side immediately. "Can you hear them, Angela?" Her voice was low in my ear._

_I listened and nodded quickly as an echo of heartbeats rumbled in my ear. Closing my eyes, I picked up on the sound as each individual heartbeat identified itself in my head. "There are eight of them," I whispered._

_Rosalie smiled and nodded. I noticed that the rest of the group had moved back from the two of us in a semi-circle formation. I raised an eyebrow inquisitively._

"_They are backing off because you are the one who most needs to hunt right now."_

"_Rosalie, I have no idea..."_

"_I know, but you will. I will be with you, but all you need to do is breathe in and follow your instincts. I promise it will come to you naturally." She chuckled as I once again raised my eyebrow questioningly. "Trust me."_

_I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, my mouth watering immediately at their scent. My eyes snapped open as I took off in the same direction as Rosalie, instinctively veering off to the left as she took the right. In an instant, I saw her hands wrap around the neck of a large stag, her teeth sinking into its jugular. A rumble from deep in my chest seemed to increase my thirst and I leapt forward, encircling the neck of the deer closest to me. I felt its heartbeat quicken in panic as I tightened my hold and buried my face against its neck. A moan escaped from my lips as the warm bittersweet liquid quelled the burn in my throat. I drank greedily, dropping with ease next to the animal as it stumbled to the ground in death. In an instant I was on my feet running again, following the scent of the herd as it had scattered in fear. Tackling another, I took it to the ground, once again moaning as the fluid flowed down my throat. _

_I let the body fall away from me and lay back against the grass, the burn finally dulled enough that I once again felt in control. I let my head fall to the side, my cheek nestling against the grass, only to find Rosalie standing off a bit to the side, watching me._

"_Did I do something wrong?" I asked, on my feet in an instant._

_Grinning, she approached me. "No, not at all. You did everything quite right." She dropped to the ground beside me, patting the spot from where I had just risen. I sat beside her staring off into the trees, wondering where the rest of the family had disappeared. "How do you feel?"_

_I turned to her. "That's a tough one to answer right now." I pulled a piece of grass and twirled it in my fingers. "I'm not thirsty anymore, if that's what you're asking."_

"_Angela, I am not going to sugar coat this for you. The rest of the family – they will try and make this as easy for you as possible and that isn't a bad thing, but you need to know what you are." My shoulders stiffened at her words. "I'm not trying to scare you, but I am going to be honest. Yes, we survive on animals, but the thirst you felt for those deer is only a tiny hint of the desire you would feel for a human's blood."_

_I shook my head in denial. "I will never..."_

"_Oh trust me, Angela. I know you don't think you would ever. But the instinct that took over when you caught the scent of that herd's blood? That same instinct will overcome your being no matter what the source and a human's blood will trigger it faster than anything else will. Our entire existence is threatened daily by that one fear - the fear that one of us will screw up and put us all in danger. You need to understand, Angela, NO ONE can know what we truly are."_

"_Bella knew, didn't she?" The question popped out before I even knew I was asking it._

_Rose snorted in response. "That isn't my story to tell." She stood and held out her hand to me. "You are part of this family. I will help you however I can, but know that you will have me to answer to if you put us in jeopardy."_

_I nodded, understanding where she was coming from and only hoping I would never disappoint her. _

My cell phone pulled me from my writing, Madonna's "Material Girl" alerting me that Alice was the culprit. Closing my laptop, I brought my cell phone to my ear. "No, I haven't been shopping yet," I chuckled.

"Angela?" The usual perky voice of my sister was very subdued.

"Alice? What's wrong?" I could still hear her speaking as the phone slid from my grip to the floor, her words echoing in my head as I curled into a ball, lost and alone.

* * *

_**End of chapter - yep, I am at it again with the cliffies! Sorry!**_


	5. Remembering When

_**A/N - Thanks to everyone for reading and reviewing so far! Your feedback means so much!**_

_**Big hugs and much love to changedbyEdward, my beta-fantastic and lyric magician!**_

_**As always...Steph owns everything and I am just playing. No copyright infringement intended.**_

* * *

I've never been  
The one to raise my hand  
That was not me  
And now that's who I am  
Because of you  
I am standing tall  
My heart is full  
Of endless gratitude  
You were the one  
The one to guide me through  
Now I can see  
And I believe  
It's only just beginning

This is what we dream about  
But the only question with me now  
Is do I make you proud  
Stronger than I've ever been now  
Never been afraid of standing out  
Do I make you proud

**- Taylor Hicks -**

* * *

_**(Alice's POV)**_

I knew when I called her there would be nothing we could do. It was not the news I had always feared I would have to relay, but it certainly wasn't any easier for her to bear.

I waited patiently on the other end of the phone line, listening to the heart-wrenching sounds of my sister falling apart as she reconciled herself to the fact that her human father, the man she had most revered, was on life support and not expected to survive the night. Although it had been over fifteen years since Angela had seen his face, I knew that she clung to his memory and that his death would be devastating to her.

About five years previous, soon after she gained control of her bloodlust, we had offered to return to Forks to allow her the chance for closure however, she declined the idea immediately. Bella had been the most surprised at her decision, as she would have given anything to have been able to see Charlie again, but Angela had been insistent that the past was the past and that she only wanted to move forward.

Complying with her wish, we moved ahead, although I still kept an eye out for anything that might trigger a need for her to possibly return. That was when the visions of her father began. The first time I saw him sitting in anguish in his office with a pistol in his hand, it took everything in me not to run to Angela with the information. But each time the vision ended the same and I soon learned that as much as the Reverend missed his daughter, he could never bring himself to commit such a sin. I often wondered if it was his strong faith or the fear he would not be permitted to see his daughter again in the afterlife that stopped him.

It seemed ironic to me that the stroke that now appeared to be taking his life came so soon after the latest vision. Perhaps God had finally heard his prayers and decided the man had suffered long enough. It was just one of those things that I would never really know for sure. I shook the idea from my mind and re-focused my attention on Angela.

"Ang, are you there?" I waited patiently for her to pick up the phone, knowing it would only be seconds before she did so.

"I'm here Alice." Her voice was soft and childlike and I immediately regretted that I hadn't simply boarded a plane and gone to her.

"Ang, what do you want to do? Jasper is sitting here with me and will make the arrangements. Do you want to go to Forks?" I waited and watched the visions change in my mind as Angela wrestled with her decision.

"Will I get there in time, Alice?"

I closed my eyes and concentrated, catching a glimpse of Angela slipping into her father's room. "Yes, if we move right now, you will get a chance to see him before…before he passes, Angela. You need to know that it won't make a difference to how this plays out, but you will get to see him."

She was silent only for a moment before her soft reply put Jasper into action. "Thank you Alice, thank you for watching for me."

"Oh Angela, you don't have to thank me…I just didn't want you to miss the chance of saying goodbye. We will meet you in Seattle; Bella and Edward will be arriving just before we do."

"I could have gone alone…I didn't mean to take you all away from your travels."

"Angela Cullen! Don't you even think another thought like that! We are family and there is nowhere else we would rather be!"

Even through her sadness, I could picture the small smile that played at her lips while she fought the urge to argue and we said our goodbyes. She was heading immediately to pack with the plan to leave as soon as Jasper had the flights arranged. Hanging up, I turned to watch my husband put the final flight details in order.

Kissing him on the neck as his fingers flew over the keys confirming our flights, I moved to pull out our bags and pack – hating the reason we were leaving, but anxious to see my sister again and return home to Forks.

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

I relaxed into the first class seat and buckled in, preparing for the long flight ahead. It had been a scramble even with my vampire speed to pack, head out for a quick hunt to quench any possible thirst and make it to the airport in time to pass through security. The only items I was convinced I had with me were my cell phone and laptop. I truly had no clue of what I had really packed in way of clothes, but knew that Alice would make sure I had whatever I required. There was no need to worry about that detail.

I watched out the window as the jet ascended, the lush greenery of the highlands slipping away as we climbed further and further into the sky. I sighed and unhooked my seatbelt, pulling the blanket over me to feign sleep so the flight attendant would leave me in peace.

Visions of the man that I had called father for the first eighteen years of my life whirled in my mind. Snapshots of a time when life was simple and I did not believe in vampires, werewolves and such. Although the recollections were faint, a few images stood out to me. I remembered when we first arrived in Forks and moved into the church rectory that became our home. I was so young, not even in school yet, but I remembered the smile on my father's face as he carried me into our new home on his shoulders, ducking down as we passed over the threshold. I could hear the echoes of my giggles as I begged him to let me down so I could explore.

I remembered the look of joy on his face when I took my first communion and became an official member of his church congregation. My father's beliefs were so strong, yet he never tried to push them onto me, answering questions whenever I asked, but allowing me to make my own choices. How proud he had been when I finally asked if I was old enough to be confirmed – I could almost feel the warmth from his smile shining down on me.

And finally, the memory that I cherished even though it hurt the most, was the day I received my letter of acceptance from Stanford. It was one of the final applications I had filled out, sticking with mostly state colleges, as I knew that my parents were not financially strong enough to afford a big name school's tuition. I had filled out all of the applications quietly, simply grateful that I would have the opportunity to continue my education. I came home from school one Friday to find several applications on the kitchen table, with a simple note _"For Angela to fill out – we will find a way."_

My parents were sitting at the table waiting for me the day the letter came. I remember walking into the kitchen and the twinkle in my father's eye nearly took my breath away as he handed me the envelope. My hands shook as I read the acceptance aloud and I choked as I looked up to see the tears of pride trailing down his cheeks. Even now, I could feel the tightness of his hug as he congratulated me and handed me another envelope, which held a bank statement showing a large enough balance to cover at least two years tuition and expenses. The thought of how much they had sacrificed through the years for me to have such an opportunity was overwhelming to say the least. When I asked why they had done it, he simply said it was because "I had never expected them to."

Sighing, I stared out at the cotton clouds that hid the world below. Although it seemed like a blink of an eye since that day, I knew the time passing had most likely been more difficult for my parents to bear. I had moved ahead with my life, or at least what it had become, attending school and graduating as I had planned, albeit not Stanford, but I had done as they would have wanted. The love and admiration that had flowed from Carlisle and Esme and the rest of my 'family' when I stepped up to accept my diploma had been heartfelt, but sorrowful as well. My real parents would never know my accomplishments; never know that I had done as they had hoped for me.

Did they still think of me? Did they still wonder what or who had taken me from them? Had they been able to accept my disappearance and move on or had they simply drifted through life, always hoping – never completely giving up? These were the thoughts that had plagued me every day as I lived my life as Angela Cullen. Part of me prayed they had found peace and moved on, yet another part of me feared that very thought.

As I slowly made my way over the Atlantic, I realized I would most likely never have the answers to my questions. It was not as if I could suddenly reappear in their lives. Instead, I would have to hide in the shadows and whisper my goodbyes. I hadn't wanted to do it five years ago and I certainly didn't want to do it now, yet I could not let him simply go. My selfish vampire nature would not allow it.

I had to see him, if only for a moment. I had to let him know that I was ok; that I had missed him every single day that I had been gone and that I would always love him. Would he know I was there? Alice had seen that he would survive until I made it there, but I hadn't thought to ask if he would be coherent. Perhaps it would be best if he were not. I had no idea what my father would think of what I had become – what I had been turned into.

I tried to recall if he had ever had opinions on such things, but my human memories failed me. Perhaps I couldn't remember because I didn't really want to know whether my father would consider me a monster, a demon. How could I continue to live this existence if he thought that of me? What choice would I have?

I shifted my position and realized that my fingers had been clenched into the arms of my seat for most of the flight. I relaxed my hold and moved the blanket to cover the damages, hoping that no one would take notice until after I was gone. Thankfully, the majority of the seats around me were vacant and I wondered if Jasper had bought the other tickets to give me breathing space. It wouldn't surprise me if he had.

The knowledge that he, Alice, Bella and Edward would be waiting for me at the gate eased a bit of my melancholy. Although it had only been a few weeks since graduation, I missed them terribly. I hadn't realized how much until I left the highlands. Even though I was on my own there, it didn't seem as difficult because the house still felt like them. My writing project held them close to my heart and I knew that was why I had been able to cope with my self-inflicted solitude.

I still felt guilty that they had torn themselves away from their travels to hold my hand as I ventured into my human past, but I honestly did not know if I would have been able to do it on my own. Of course, Alice knew that and had planned accordingly. Never bet against Alice. I smiled at the thought of her bouncing on her heels as she waited for my plane to land and it calmed me in a way I hadn't thought possible.

That was how I would survive if my father was coherent and unable to accept me for what I had become. My 'siblings' would be there to pick up the pieces when I fell apart. They would be there to bring me back into the light from the dark cloud that loomed over my head. That knowledge was what had given me the resolve to make this journey. My 'family' would be there to see me through and really, what more could a vampire ask for?

* * *

_**End of chapter - so what do YOU think Rev. Weber would think of Vampire Angela?**_


	6. Home

_**A/N – Much love to all who have taken the time to review, comment, etc. – your support of Angela's story means so much! I know some of you are hoping for more back story and it will continue…..but she will also move along in the present day as well. Can't say much more without giving anything away!**_

_**Love and gratitude to my wonderful beta (and lyric genius LOL) , changedbyEdward. I would be lost without you bb.**_

_**Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.**_

* * *

_When you're down and troubled_  
_and you need a helping hand_  
_and nothing, whoa nothing is going right._  
_Close your eyes and think of me_  
_and soon I will be there_  
_to brighten up even your darkest nights._

_You just call out my name,_  
_and you know wherever I am_  
_I'll come running, oh yeah baby_  
_to see you again._  
_Winter, spring, summer, or fall,_  
_all you have to do is call_  
_and I'll be there, yeah, yeah, yeah._  
_You've got a friend._

_- James Taylor -_

* * *

_**(Edward's POV)**_

"Bella!" I turned and smiled as Alice pulled my wife into a hug, her enthusiasm bubbling over as always. Grinning, I nodded to Jasper as our two wives conversed a mile a minute.

"Hey, do I not even warrant a hello?" I pouted as Alice turned to me in a huff.

"Hello, Brother Dear!" Alice mocked as she wrapped me in a hug. "You're so needy, Edward!"

I scowled playfully in response. "When's Angela's plane supposed to arrive?" I asked as I scoured the crowded airport for her face. I knew she hadn't arrived yet as her thoughts were still quiet to me. Being her sire, I had discovered that our connection was much stronger than the others and I could hear her thoughts from a much greater distance.

"Her flight will touch down in exactly 22 minutes." Alice's eyes sparkled as she answered. "I know it isn't for the best reason, but I can't wait to see her."

"How is she, Alice?" Bella nuzzled into my side as she asked. Although Bella's control around humans was phenomenal, airports and other crowded areas tended to still make her a bit uncomfortable. I was thankful we wouldn't have to wait too long for Angela's plane to arrive; the sooner we were all away from the crowds and on our way to Forks, the better.

"It was difficult for her to hear about her dad, but once she processed what I told her she seemed to relax. I know she's anxious about slipping into the hospital to see him, but I don't see any reason for her to worry." Alice's face went blank for a moment. "Nope, everything will be fine."

"Is her father conscious, Alice? Will he know she's there?" Even though Alice was confident, I still worried that it might be too much of a risk. I would never stop Angela from getting this closure, but I did want to make sure that we covered all our bases.

"It will be fine, Edward; stop worrying about it." Alice avoided my question and slipped her arm through Jasper's. "How was Vienna?"

"Beautiful!" Bella beamed as she began filling Alice in on all we had seen on our latest trek. I listened as she described our visit to the Belvedere Palace and an opera we had seen at the concert hall. I hugged her close as she sighed at the memory of our last night there, walking along the banks of the Danube in the twilight. "It was probably my favourite place we have visited so far."

"You say that every time we return from a trip, love," I chuckled as I pressed my lips against the top of her head. Bella's love for history, art and music had only grown with her change and it was such a thrill to be able to take her to all the places she wanted to explore. Although I had travelled extensively throughout my immortal life, it was amazing to see everything again through her eyes. "I can't wait to see what your next favourite place is," I whispered as I leaned down to kiss her lips.

"Look there she is!" Alice squealed and grabbing Bella's hand, they ran at human pace to meet Angela as she stepped off the escalator. I grinned at her when her eyes met mine and listened to her thoughts of how much she had missed her two sisters. Her need to get to the hospital to see her father was also evident, but it didn't stop her from enjoying the reunion.

Jasper and I moved towards the girls and I watched as Angela pulled Jasper into a hug before moving over to me. _"I have missed you,"_ she thought, hugging me close and then backing away. I ruffled her hair and took the bag from her shoulder.

"How are you? Really." She looked up at me and shook her head, sadness clouding her eyes. Understanding her need to remain collected; I nodded and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, catching Bella's hand with my free one. "Let's go home."

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

Home. I sat in the back of the rental and listened as Bella and Alice chattered back and forth about our imminent return to Forks. I understood how it could seem like home to the rest of them, even Bella as she had spent her fair share of time at the Cullen house while she was a human. But for me, the only home I had ever known in Forks was off limits to me.

I felt a wave of calm wash over me and I looked over at Jasper, who was watching me intently, eyebrow raised. I smiled at him and shook my head lightly, not wanting to get into that discussion when they had all done so much for me, simply by coming home so I wouldn't have to face what lay ahead alone. It wasn't that I feared they wouldn't understand – far from it. I just didn't want to feel their pity and no matter how much they denied it, that is what it would be…pity. Pity that I had suffered at the hands of monsters who had taken me so close to death that Edward felt no other choice than making me into one of them. Pity from Edward for taking me away from the father I was now losing all over again. Pity from Jasper that he couldn't stop me from feeling all that I was feeling. Alice would suffer with the feelings that she could have done more, even though bringing me here so I could say goodbye was far more than I ever could have asked for.

And finally, the pity from Bella would be the worst of all. Her sorrow in knowing that she was the reason I had been taken all those years ago. She was the reason that Edward couldn't let me go. She was the reason I was now one of them.

We turned off the highway and followed a narrow driveway almost completely masked by trees and heavy foliage. I stared out the window and watched silently as we took the final turn, slowing as we pulled up to the house. A gasp escaped my lips as I saw Carlisle and Esme standing on the steps, awaiting our arrival.

"You didn't really think they wouldn't be here, did ya darlin'?" Jasper smiled as he looked back at me from the front seat. I shook my head, unable to vocalize my feelings at that moment. Before Edward even had the car in park, I was out of the vehicle running for the stairs and into the arms of the only one who could help me at that moment.

"It's all right, Angel." I heard Carlisle's whispers as he held me tight to his chest while Esme grasped my free hand firmly in hers. The others seemed to disappear, realizing that what I needed most at that moment was comfort from the closest thing I had to parents. I followed blindly as they guided me into the house, unwilling to leave the protective cocoon that now embraced me.

When I was finally calm enough I stood and moved to the fireplace, watching the flames that danced over the cedar logs. I inhaled deeply, the smoky scent offering yet another soothing release before turning to face them.

"Thank you. Thank you for coming here for me."

"Oh darling, where else would we be?" Esme moved towards me, brushing my hair away from my shoulder before cupping my face between her tiny hands. "I know how sad you are and my heart aches for you. I would never have one of my children face this alone."

I smiled back at her, clasping her hands in mine. "I know Esme and I'm so grateful." I looked over to Carlisle. "So grateful to both of you." I dropped into an oversized armchair and pulled my legs up, tucking them under me. "I need you to both know that I appreciate everything you have done for me. You welcomed me into this family without hesitation and I love you both so much. Please don't think I feel any less because of wanting to be here to say goodbye."

"Angel, we never would think that of you." Carlisle spoke softly as Esme rejoined him on the couch. Taking her hand in his, he smiled gently. "We understand the loss you are feeling and why. The way you were brought into our world was so different from the rest of the family – it's only natural that you are feeling as you do."

I nodded, grateful that they were not upset with me. I never really believed they would be, but I couldn't help the guilt I felt. They had been so good to me – even when I hadn't really deserved their patience and affection. I couldn't help but worry that they would think that I had taken it all for granted.

We sat quietly for awhile, enjoying the warmth of the fire as we chatted about my time in Scotland and my writing project. It felt so good to be back with them again that I was almost able to push the sadness away for a bit.

But all too soon, reality returned. I saw Alice enter the room and knew it was time for me to go. "Your bags are upstairs in the third room on the left, Ang."

"Thanks Ali, I'll just freshen up before we go." I stood and moved to the stairs, glancing back to see them all watching me. "I'll be ok. I know you're all worried but don't, okay?"

I didn't wait for an answer, instead I rushed up the stairs and into the room. Closing the door, I leaned back against it for a moment, taking a deep yet unnecessary breath, hoping it would settle the unease I felt. It didn't work.

I showered quickly and pulled out a pair of black jeans and matching sweater. I pulled my hair into a tight ponytail and stared into the mirror, willing myself to calm. I knew that if Jasper sensed how stressed I was, both he and Edward would argue that I shouldn't go. I couldn't not go. I had to see him…one last time. I slipped on my shoes and dug into the bottom of my suitcase, grabbing the one accessory I needed with me. Slipping the tortoise shell frames onto my face, I took one last glance and stuck my tongue out at the reflection of the little girl lost from my past.

The ride to the hospital was quiet as I thought over the reunion that lay ahead of me. I leaned back against the back seat, closing my eyes and focussing on the soft music as Jasper and Alice talked back and forth quietly. I had a feeling that Edward and Bella weren't too far behind us, but were trying not to crowd me. I appreciated the effort.

We pulled into the hospital parking lot and watched a few stragglers leave the hospital. Visiting hours had been over for almost twenty minutes but there were always those who stayed as long as they could. I grabbed my purse and moved towards the door.

"Wait!" Alice's voice was barely more than a whisper but I froze. Moments later, I watched the hospital doors open again and stifled a cry as I watched my mother emerge.

The wind picked up as she made her way out into the night and I watched her pull her coat tight around her body, trying to protect her tiny frame from the cold. I was overcome with sadness as I took in the worry lines etched into her face. She had aged so much in the years I had been gone, easily looking at least ten years older than her actual fifty years. She turned back towards the hospital and stood watching for a moment and then dropped her head as if in prayer. I watched helplessly as her shoulders heaved in sorrow for a moment before she let herself into her car.

Watching until her taillights had long since disappeared from the parking lot, I slowly let out the breath I had been holding from the instant I saw her face.

"Are you ok, darlin'?" Jasper watched me carefully. I knew he was fighting the urge to use his gift and I appreciated that he was allowing me to feel the emotions. I knew it would be easy to let him dull the pain, but it would be less effective as far as gaining the closure I needed.

I patted his arm gently and moved towards the door. "I'll be fine. I don't know how long I'll be…"

"Take your time, Angela." Alice squeezed my hand. "We'll be right here waiting for you, okay?"

I nodded, closed the door lightly and stared at the building that loomed in front of me. Taking another deep breath, I moved towards the doors, dreading how I knew this situation would end, yet unable to ignore the excitement I felt at the thought of seeing my father again. Grasping the handle and with one last glance back at my siblings, I opened the door and stepped inside.

* * *

_**End of Chapter – get the tissue ready! Next chap will be a toughie!**_


	7. Fly Away

**_A/N - Short and sweet as I want to get this one out...RL has dealt me a bit of a blow so writing has been slow this week...will do my best to have another chap out soon though! Thanks again to everyone for the lovely comments on Ang's tale so far...get your tissues for this one...don't say I didn't warn you!_**

**_As always, many thanks and much love to my betaQueen...changedbyEdward. Thanks for getting this one done for me bb...BIG HUGS!_**

_**Steph still owns everything and I am still in awe of her and just love borrowing her stuff...no copyright infringement intended!**_

* * *

_It might have appeared to go unnoticed,  
But I've got it all here in my heart.  
I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it,  
I would be nothing with out you._

_Did you ever know that you're my hero,_  
_And everything I would like to be?_  
_I can fly higher than an eagle,_  
_cause you are the wind beneath my wings._

_Fly, fly, fly away,_  
_You let me fly so high._  
_Oh, fly, fly,_  
_So high against the sky, so high I almost touch the sky._  
_Thank you, thank you, thank god for you,_  
_The wind beneath my wings._

_**- Bette Midler -**_

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

I made my way down the third floor hall, my footsteps silent as I ghosted past the nurses' station and towards my father's room. I held my breath, not so much in fear of the scent of blood, but to avoid the clinical odour of the cleaners that did anything but mask the smell of death that loomed on the floor.

Reaching his door, I stopped short of entering, mentally preparing myself for what I was about to face. I rested my forehead against the frame and listened to my father's struggling heartbeat. Alice had been right. I was here to say goodbye, but apart from sending him into internal damnation, which obviously was not a choice, there was nothing I would be able to do for him.

Not wanting to waste any of the time he had left, I pulled myself together and stepped inside. My eyes immediately found him and I stood with my hand still on the door, stunned at the sight of the small, fragile body that lay in the middle of the room. Moving closer I took in the dark bruised circles beneath his closed lids, the creases in his weathered brow, the silver that had taken over what was left of his hair. Although I knew the stroke had taken a lot out of him, I feared that my disappearance was more to blame for all the changes I saw.

Tearing my eyes away, I focused instead on the machines that appeared to be for the most part, keeping my father alive. Tubes and wires ran everywhere and I listened as his breathing kept in rhythm with the ventilator to his left. My fretting over what my father would think of me was most likely in vain. Part of me was relieved, yet I felt a deep sadness that he would not know I had been there.

Moving closer to his bedside, I studied his face in greater detail – taking in each wrinkle, each crease and committing it to memory. My eyes drifted away from his face to his hands, clasped together as if in prayer. Unable to resist, I pulled the visitor's chair closer to the bed, and sat for a moment, unsure if I should continue. Covering my father's hands with the blanket, I gently took one hand in mine, hoping the fabric would be enough to keep him from being chilled. Resting my cheek against the pillow, I sat in vigil, only tearing my eyes from his face to check the monitors occasionally.

"I'm here, Dad. I don't know if you can hear me, but I hope that you can. I know I should have been here sooner, but I was afraid. I know that isn't much of an excuse and I'm sorry, so sorry that I wasn't stronger. I will never forgive myself for not being brave enough to face you. I hope that someday you can forgive me." I looked at the monitors and my heart was heavy. No response. Not even a blip to acknowledge that I was there.

"Daddy, I want you to know that there was nothing you could have done. There was no way that you or Mum or anyone else for that matter could have stopped them from taking me. It has taken me a long time to come to terms with everything that happened, but the one thing I am most grateful for is that I was alone when they came. I can live with the consequences, but I don't think I could have if something had happened to you or Mum. The rest of the family needed you both and I can take comfort in the fact that you were both there to see them grow up.

I know my disappearance was hard on you. I can see it in your face and I saw it in Mum when I saw her leave tonight." I paused for a moment, my hand moving to touch his weathered cheek before recapturing his bundled hand. "I'm so sorry for the pain that it caused you. If there had been any way that I could have found my way back to you, I would have, Dad…I would have. But I was afraid that you would not have been able to understand, so I made my choice and stayed away. I hope you can forgive me for that. I want you to know that I didn't suffer for long and that even though my captors will forever haunt me – they paid for what they did to me. I know that vengeance isn't very Christian, but that is just one of the many things that has changed about me."

I buried my face against the soft blanket and fought the urge to flee the room, unsure of how to continue. There was so much I wanted to say and even though I didn't believe he could hear any of it, I felt compelled to continue. But how could I tell him? How could I put into words everything that had happened without it sounding as if I had just moved on and forgotten all about them?

* * *

_**(Edward's POV)**_

We sat together in the lofty branches of an old oak directly across the parking lot from Rev. Weber's room. Still unsure of how everything was going to turn out, I was relieved when Jasper and Alice offered to drive Angela to the hospital. As much as we didn't want to smother her, she needed to know that we were all there for her if she needed us. For that very reason, Bella and I decided to follow behind in the off chance something came up.

I really wasn't worried. The wolves knew we were in the area, Bella and Jacob had spoken on the phone several times before we made our way into Forks, just to be sure we were all on the same page. Although I still wouldn't call us friends, things had definitely improved between us and the pack, and that definitely made things easier for our visit home.

The only worry I had was Angela. The remorse and guilt she was feeling towards her father was heartbreaking and I could not help but blame myself for what she was going through. I listened as she spoke in soft tones, apologizing for things she really had no control over. Her sorrow of not being able to come to him sooner, of not being able to let them know she was all right. These were things that she could never have done before now and even if she had, it would have been risking their lives to know what really happened. Not to mention revealing to her father, a man of the cloth, that she had become something his God could never accept.

I closed my eyes and fought back the memories of that fateful day. Had I made the right choice? It was not a question I had asked myself in recent years, content to allow Angela's quiet indifference to her situation be answer enough. But now, as I listened to her pour her heart and soul out to her father, her guilt and remorse so real – I couldn't help but wonder.

"Edward, stop." I felt Bella's loving touch on my cheek and opened my eyes to meet hers. Moving closer to me, she cupped my face in her hands, her thumbs gently caressing my cheeks. "You can't go back and change things and Angela wouldn't want you to."

"I thought I was the mind reader, love." I pressed a kiss into her hand; her touch calming me as no other's could.

"I know you well enough to recognize when you are beating yourself up inside." Bella took my hands in hers, squeezing them gently. "She is going to be sad. It was different for you because your parents were already gone, but not only is she losing her father; she is losing a link to her human life."

"But you didn't feel that way about Phil and Renee." I watched my wife carefully, unsure if it had been wise to bring up her mother. We had been so worried about Bella's mother and stepfather when Victoria was on her rampage. They had disappeared around the time Charlie was killed and we feared the worst only to learn that they had relocated to Upper New York State where Phil had been offered a coaching job. Although we were relieved to find them still among the living, it had devastated Bella that her mother had basically washed her hands of her daughter once she was institutionalized. When Carlisle finalized the paperwork regarding Bella's 'suicide' and had the appropriate documents forwarded to Renee, there had been no response.

Jenks, our lawyer, informed us that there had been one phone call to confirm that funeral costs for both Charlie and Bella had been covered by the insurance and that had been the only contact. Just the memory of how cold and indifferent she had been was enough to make my skin crawl. Bella had simply shrugged it off as simply 'being Renee.' I knew it had hurt her, but she tucked the pain away and moved on.

Then, only two short years later, word came to us that Renee and Phil had been involved in a head-on collision with a tractor trailer; both of them being killed instantly. Part of me, the monster I suppose, was glad to see vengeance for how they had treated Bella. However, the rest of me mourned Bella's loss and waited for her to fall apart…to go through the same emotions that Angela was going through right now. But again, my wife surprised me, compartmentalizing it as a sad event, yet not really allowing it to affect her emotionally.

"Edward, it isn't really the same thing. Angela had never been separated from either parent before she was taken. She didn't get a chance to prepare herself for the separation or say goodbye. I hadn't seen my mother since my move to Forks, other than her fly-by-night trip when I was first committed. And before that happened…" Bella stopped.

"You had already prepared yourself because you were hoping I would turn you." I finished her thought and was overcome again by regret. This time not for Angela, but my own foolish mistakes that had caused this mess in the first place. If only I had changed Bella when she first asked, none of this would have happened. She would already have been a vampire when James, Victoria and Laurent came into our lives. James wouldn't have hunted Bella, thus Victoria still would have had her mate and never turned Mike Newton.

"Edward, stop!" I felt Bella's hands once again as she pried my hands away from my head. "You have to start accepting that some things are just meant to happen. Fate has a strange way of dealing its hand, but we have to play with what is given." Her hands once again cupped my face, her lips pressed lightly against my forehead. "I love you. I love my life and have no regrets and I think you need to ask Angela how she feels instead of trying to gauge the answer from what you hear in her head." She tapped her fist against my scalp. "Sometimes your gift is more of a curse...you know?"

I chuckled. "You're just now realizing this?"

"Well no, but I think you forget sometimes. Now, instead of hanging out in this tree with me brooding, why don't you go and help my sister?"

"Bella, I don't brood."

It amazed me how very human Bella could still appear, her eye roll being a distinct feature she had carried over perfectly with her change. Sticking my tongue out at her, I pulled her close, kissing her fiercely on the lips before moving down the tree.

"I still say you brood," I heard her laugh as I made my way across the parking lot and in through the hospital doors. I wasn't sure that Angela would want my company, but I would be close in case she did need me.

I continued to listen as I approached the door, pausing just outside as I processed the conversation in my mind. Smiling, I opened the door, Angela's eyes immediately meeting mine, questioning my presence.

"Don't stop talking, Ang. He hears you." Angela froze momentarily, staring at me, her eyes shining with the tears she would never shed. I smiled encouragingly and she looked down at her father, gasping as she saw his eyes were now open and fixated on her face.

"Dad?" Angela whispered, her hand still clutching his.

"The stroke has affected his motor skills, Ang. He has little ability, but his mind is quite clear. He can't believe you're really here." I moved closer to the bed and watched as Rev. Weber's eyes found mine. "He recognizes me as Carlisle's boy and he's wondering why I am here with you."

"What do I tell him?"

Her thoughts were chaotic and I answered softly and quickly so only she would hear. "You can tell him whatever you wish, Ang."

Understanding what I meant, she looked down at her father, his eyes again meeting hers. Even though he was unable to speak, his mind was sharp and I was not surprised when he came to an accurate conclusion. "So the legends are true then."

"He knows what we are." Angela looked at me in surprise.

"You can hear my thoughts?" Rev. Weber looked back to me and I smiled again, nodding slightly at the question in his eyes. His eyes closed for a moment and opened again. "Tell my daughter I love her and I'm so glad that she is here."

I relayed his message and then stepped back, giving them a moment just to be together – finally reunited. When Angela began to tell her father about what happened, I waited for any comment or question he might have, but he simply listened to his daughter talk. I watched the monitors carefully, ready to steer Angela away from her tale at the first sign of distress. But one never came.

I feared the moment when Angela told her father that I was the one to end her human life. How would he respond knowing his daughter's killer was in his presence? I was terrified that it would be too much for him to bear. As if sensing my fear, Angela looked towards me, her eyes locking with mine, and I froze at her words.

"Edward found me and saved me."

Overcome, I nodded when I heard the Reverend's unspoken thank you. Angela continued her story, giving her father highlights of the years she had been away, thankfully glossing over some of her more stubborn moments as a newborn. As well as her father was handling everything she was telling him, I didn't know how well he would handle some of those stories.

A lone tear trickled down his weathered cheek when Angela told him that she had completed her Masters in Renaissance Art History and hoped to complete her PhD as soon as possible. His pride was evident, but I voiced his thoughts to Angela anyway, knowing it would be good for her to know how pleased he truly was.

As Angela continued to tell her father about our family and where we had travelled, I watched the monitors closely. I knew it wouldn't be much longer as his body was shutting down and his heart was slowing. His thoughts were becoming more jumbled, but I felt him struggling to stay, even though he knew his time was near.

He caught my eye so I nodded and moved to Angela's side. She looked at me, her expression full of sadness, knowing it was time. Leaning down, she pressed her lips to her father's forehead, her hand never leaving his. "Goodbye, Daddy."

His eyes held hers for a moment and then closed. I hugged Angela close, whispering the verse her father had asked me to recite to her.

_"As a shepherd carries a lamb,_  
_I have carried you close to my heart."_

"Isaiah 40:11," Angela whispered, choking a sob back as her father's hand relaxed in hers. Wrapping an arm around her tightly, I led her from the room and into the night.

* * *

_**End of chapter - would love to hear your thoughts...**_


	8. Peace

**_A/N - Thank you for all the kind words regarding the last chapter...I know things have been dark, but I promise it won't always be that way..._**

**_ChangedbyEdward, love you more than apple pie, bb...thanks for being the best freaking beta and friend ever...smooches!_**

_**Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.**_

* * *

_Well, I'm tired and so weary_  
_But I must go along_  
_Till the lord will come and call, call me away, oh yeah_  
_Well the morning's so bright_  
_And the Lamb is the light_  
_And the night, night is as black as the sea, oh yes_  
_(alt lyric: 'and the night, night is as fair as the day, oh yes')_

_(There will be peace in the valley for me, some day)_  
_There will be peace in the valley for me, oh Lord I pray_  
_(There'll be no sadness, no sorrow, my Lord,_  
_no trouble, trouble I see)_  
_There will be peace in the valley for me_

_Well the bear will be gentle_  
_And the wolf will be tame_  
_And the lion shall lay down, down by the lamb, oh yes_  
_And the beasts from the wild_  
_Shall be led by a child_  
_And I'll be changed, changed from this creature that I am, oh yes_

_(There will be peace in the valley for me, some day)_  
_There will be peace in the valley for me, oh Lord I pray_  
_(There'll be no sadness, no sorrow, oh my Lordy, no trouble, trouble I see)_  
_There will be peace in the valley for me, [for me]_

_- Elvis Presley -_

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

A hum of melancholy seemed to take over the tiny town I had once called home. The weather matched the sentiment; dark burly clouds blew in from the coast to hang heavily over the sombre cemetery as all of Forks seemed to congregate under dark umbrellas to say farewell to my father.

I knew that he had always been a well-respected member of the community, but the overwhelming outpour of sympathy and condolences to the remaining members of my human family soothed the sorrow in my heart when I could not actually be with them to say goodbye.

Instead, I hid myself high in the trees, completely masked to the human eye, yet close enough to hear the sound of the hymns as they echoed from the open windows of the tiny church I had loved as a child. Reverend McMillan, a dear friend of my parents, had flown in to take the service and I smiled as I listened to the various stories he told of my father to the congregation. Their friendship had been selfless and true and it pleased me to know that they had stayed in touch, especially after I was abducted.

It took everything in me not to run into the church when I heard the gentle tears of my mother multiply as the Reverend spoke of the bond that I had shared with my father and the devastation that he and my mother had endured when I disappeared. I gripped the branches of the evergreen tightly, wrapping my body against the trunk of the cedar as if tethering myself to it. Revealing myself to her was an impossibility; I could not risk the lives of everyone I loved to offer something that would most likely terrify rather than comfort.

For a moment I regretted not allowing Jasper to come with me; his calming vibes would definitely have been of benefit. Relief came swiftly however, when I heard the opening notes of my father's favourite hymn. The soothing lyrics of "Peace in the Valley" brought memories of my father playing Elvis Presley records late into the evening. Although he had many of his albums, he cherished the gospel recordings more than anything else and it was fitting that my mother had chosen to send him home with his favourite.

Perching even higher amongst the dark green boughs, I watched them lower my father to his final resting place, raindrops falling in reflection of the tears that now fell freely amongst the mourners. Soft murmurs spoken, delicate roses left in farewell; I silently witnessed it all as my mother and family acknowledged each gesture. At last, only a few remained and I clutched my fist to my mouth as my mother finally allowed herself a private moment. Pressing her lips to the rose she held, she whispered a goodbye and dropped the bloom onto the casket. She moved away but turned back suddenly and I froze against the cedar as her eyes seemed to search the sky for answers.

A gentle breeze stole through the now empty cemetery and I watched her raise her face to the heavens, a hint of a smile dancing against her lips as she told my father to look after me. And then she was gone - her name silent on my lips and with venom burning against my eyelids, I said my goodbye to her as well.

I remained in the trees until twilight, the light breeze brushing softly against my skin, the raindrops offering the tears I was unable to shed. I was relieved to know that my father was at peace at last and that he knew that I had survived…at least in a sense. I hated that I could not offer my mother the same closure, but the afternoon's events gave me the odd comfort that she had made her own peace and I could give her nothing more than that. It wasn't as if I could reappear after all this time and be a part of the family. The past was the past and I had to accept it as such.

Dropping silently to the ground, I made my way through the shadows and found my way to my father's grave. I had watched the pallbearers take their turns filling in the ground where he lay, finally blanketing it with the floral arrangements before taking their leave. I plucked a lone flower that lay off to the side and held the delicate blossom to my lips, kissing it gently before laying it amongst the others.

"Goodbye, Daddy. I will never forget." As if in answer, the wind picked up and I knew it was time to return home. I also knew without a doubt that the rest of my family would be worried that I had been gone so long, but I appreciated that they had allowed me to do this on my own. Turning towards the entrance, I froze, unable to believe the sight before me.

"Angela?" The question was no more than a whisper, the voice unsure and full of emotion. The tone was familiar yet not, a distant memory of a time long past. Unable to flee, I raised my eyes and met the warm molasses orbs that seemed sad yet hopeful at the same time. "It's really you, isn't it?"

* * *

_**(Alice's POV)**_

With each step we had taken towards Forks, the vision had become clearer. I knew without a doubt that I couldn't share it with anyone, even though I longed to do so.

As always, Edward would be the most difficult to block, but I was prepared. List after list of details for our Christmas celebration in Alaska scrolled through my mind as we sat in the living room waiting for Angela to return. Luckily, Jasper and Edward had been wrapped up in a fierce chess battle, so other than the odd questioning glance, it had been relatively easy to keep my mind clear of anything that might rattle chains.

It had been a bit of a tense moment when Angela had announced that she was going to the funeral, _and_ was going alone. Edward had been quick to argue that she didn't need to put herself through it when she had already said her goodbyes at the hospital, but my youngest sister was adamant. Carlisle had been quick to her defence, saying that she had every right to be in attendance, even if it were from a discreet hiding place, but perhaps it would be wise for one of us to accompany her. Again, Angela stood her ground and won, much to Edward and Jasper's frustration.

Bella and I spent a few moments with her before she left, and I knew that her decision was the right one. Although she had been lucky enough to communicate with her father in his final moments, she needed this closure as well.

Shaken out of my reverie, I cocked an eyebrow at Bella, her eyes full of question. "What are you plotting, Alice?"

Before I could answer, Edward had joined us on the couch, pulling his wife onto his lap as they snuggled together for a kiss. "I was wondering the exact same thing."

"Why do I have to be plotting anything?" I leaned back and met Jasper's lips as he wrapped his arms around me from behind.

"You have been awfully quiet, darlin'," Jasper chuckled; his embrace warm and comforting.

"Nothing that any of you need to be worried about. Do you expect our holiday in Alaska just to prepare itself?" I huffed out, hoping that it would throw them off. "And you, dear brother, can just stay out of my head or I will make sure Christmas is your worst nightmare!"

Edward studied me for a moment and I fought the urge to stick my tongue out at him. Out of all my siblings, no one could rile me more. I loved him dearly, but there were moments when I considered his gift an absolute curse, especially when I knew that some things were just meant to be – even if he didn't think so.

"Alice, you and I both know whatever is going on in that little head of yours has nothing to do with Christmas or Alaska." Edward leaned forward, his fingers taking their trademark grip on the bridge of his nose. "What is going on? What did you see?"

"Edward, give her a break!" Bella smacked him on the shoulder with the palm of her hand. "You should know that if it was a problem she would share it with us. Can you not, for once, just let things happen?"

I chuckled as a look of shock and disbelief ran across my brother's face. "You have been listening to Rose too much, love." He laughed as he grabbed Bella's hand, pretending to snap it off before covering it with kisses.

"Oh for God sake you two, drop it down a notch!" Jasper's eyes darkened as he pulled me to my feet. "Alice and I are going for a run. We'll be back in a bit."

I laughed as I caught the wave of lust Jasper pushed out at me and winked at Bella as we darted out the door and towards the lush green for some time alone.

We ran together, our own version of cat and mouse as we lost ourselves in the beautiful forest that backed off the property. I was currently the cat, waiting for my moment to pounce. I watched for Jasper to come through the underbrush, knowing it would only be a moment. His golden mane ruffled gently around his face against the breeze as he appeared from between a boulder and the oak tree I was perched in.

I dropped, tackling him to the ground. "Gotcha!" I buried my lips against his neck, my teeth grazing his skin. A soft moan escaped from his mouth before he turned over quickly, his arm giving me a head rest as he flipped us over, his body now hovering over mine.

"You did have me, darlin', but now it appears I have you exactly where I want you." He laughed and kissed me deeply, teasing my bottom lip with his tongue.

I squirmed against him, enjoying the lovely friction of our bodies twisted together. "You do indeed, Major. Now what are you going to do with me?"

His free hand slid up my side, grazing against my breast and then gently raising my arm up and over my head, anchoring my hand in his against the ground. "Interrogate you," he whispered, his teeth and tongue grazing the skin beneath my lobe.

Pouting, I stared up into his face. "Interrogate me? I can think of plenty of things that would be much more entertaining than that, Jazzy."

"Now, darlin', I didn't say I wasn't going to have fun doing it." Jasper's mouth met mine again, his tongue twisting with mine as the heat between us ignited. I let myself go with the kiss, pushing all the love and devotion I felt for him into it. He moaned deeply into my mouth, his hand tightening against mine as he rubbed his body against mine in response.

Pulling away, he grinned at me wickedly. "Don't think you are going to get out of answering that way, darlin'!" Rolling away, he sat up, pulling me into a similar position beside him, his arm snuggling me to his side.

Crossing my arms and huffing, I stared off into the trees. "Fine!"

"What's going on, Ali?" His fingers massaged my shoulder gently. "What did you see?"

"It's nothing bad, Jazz. Actually, it's wonderful, but it isn't mine to share and I don't want to ruin it."

"Alice, I understand what you are saying, but I hate when you feel as though you can't share things with me."

"I know you do, but this one just has to work itself out. If I tell you and Edward sees…"

"He would interfere." Jasper finished my statement, pulling me close and pressing his lips against my forehead. "Okay, I'll let it go for now – as long as you're sure that it's for the best."

Smiling brightly, I nodded, cupping his face in my hands and kissing him gently. "I promise you won't have to wait long. I'm right, Jazz – everything will work out." I tapped my head and kissed him again. "Now, where were we? Oh I believe you're it!"

I moved to run, but hesitated only slightly, chuckling as the soft growl escaped his lips and he captured me by the waist, pulling me down beside him. "Not so fast, darlin', I am far from done with you yet."

Our echoing laughter in the trees softened to tender sighs and moans and once again my mind was occupied and blissfully free of everything except my mate's hungry touch and desire.

* * *

_**End of chapter - I could be convinced to write an Alice/Jasper outtake if anyone is interested...of course reviews could twist my arm even more!**_


	9. What Might Have Been

_**A/N – And here we have another chap, finally! I am so sorry for the delay but RL has been a bugger and of course writer's block did not help either! The good news is that the next chap is well on its way to being written so I should post on schedule next week!**_

_**ChangedbyEdward – you rock my world, bb! Thank you for the superquick turnaround on this and of course for continuing to be my Lyric Guru! Loves ya!**_

_**You know the drill. Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight and I am simply borrowing. No copyright infringement intended.**_

* * *

_Sure I think about you now and then_  
_But it's been a long, long time_  
_I've got a good life now, I moved on_  
_So when you cross my mind_

_I try not to think about what might have been_  
_'Cause that was then and we have taken different roads_  
_We can't go back again there's no use giving in_  
_And there's no way to know what might have been_

_We can sit and talk about this all night long_  
_And wonder why we didn't last_  
_Yes, they might be the best days we will ever know_  
_But we'll have to leave them in the past_

_So try not to think about what might have been_  
_'Cause that was then and we have taken different roads_  
_We can't go back again there's no use giving in_  
_And there's no way to know what might have been_

_- Little Texas –_

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

"_Angela? It's really you isn't it?"_

The question rang in my ears as I stood frozen, unable to move or respond. I was spellbound by the voice that had whispered my name in so many memories over the years since my change. A voice I had tried unsuccessfully to forget.

I remained still, my eyes focussed on the ground in front of me. There was no way I could allow myself to meet the gaze of the one who had spoken. I couldn't bear to look at the one thing I had lost that I could never replace.

Catching movement out of my peripheral, I took a step back, my hands raised in caution. "Please. Don't come any closer." I needed to run, yet I couldn't bring myself to leave.

"Angela, please don't go. Look at me, please." The voice was softer this time, full of anguish and pleading as if he sensed I was on the verge of vanishing.

_Resistance is futile. _I shook my head at the cheesy quote that seemed to be on repeat rotation in my head. I was going to kill Emmett the next time I saw him for all the Star Trek Next Generation marathons he had forced me to endure over the years. Pulling myself from my vengeful thoughts, I knew that I was hearing it for a reason. I couldn't resist. Unsure of how I was going to handle the next few moments, I raised my head and stared into the beautiful coffee-colored eyes that had stolen my heart so long ago.

The eyes were the same, but a lot had changed since the last time I had seen Ben Cheney. Gone was the gangly teen that had shyly taken my hand and walked down the hallways of Forks High. He was taller now, my height or perhaps even a bit taller with broad shoulders and a more chiselled physique. His complexion was clear and held a weathered look as if he spent a great deal of time outdoors and his hair was longer, full and jet black, brushing against the collar of the leather jacket he wore. A glimmer of hope seemed to radiate from him as we stood silently staring at each other.

"It really is you, isn't it?" The question was spoken almost as a confirmation, softly as if only meant for his benefit. Unable to resist I took a step closer, allowing myself to breathe in his scent for the first time since he had entered the cemetery. A subtle combination of old leather and nutmeg filled my senses and I swallowed back the venom that pooled immediately in my mouth. I would not hurt him. Swallowing again, I moved closer still, until we stood only two rows of stones apart.

There were so many things I wanted to say, yet I didn't even know where to begin. I hadn't prepared myself for the possibility of seeing him; never dreaming that he would still be here, in Forks. But it shouldn't have surprised me. That was Ben. Kind, gentle Ben who would be there for my mother in her darkest hour.

Still if I didn't consider the possibility, Alice must have known. And then it hit me. She had known…she knew Ben would be here and that there was a chance we would connect. That was why she had been so adamant that I be allowed to do as I wished as far as attending the service. I made a mental note to have a chat with the interfering little pixie and then brought my focus back to the situation at hand.

* * *

_**(Ben's POV)**_

I sat in the church parking lot and listened to the melody of the final hymn as its notes drifted out through the open doors of the chapel. My heart was heavy as I watched Mrs. Weber and the twins follow the pallbearers towards the cemetery. I knew that I should have been stronger and agreed when she had asked me to be one, but it was so soon after my own father's passing that I just couldn't do it. I had promised her that I would be there and I had kept my promise, even though I hadn't been able to enter the church.

I watched the mourners from a distance as they paid their respects to the family, the crowd finally dwindling until only the boys and Mrs. Weber remained. Wanting to give their mother a moment of privacy, they had nodded as they passed the car and made their way down the path that led to the house they had grown up in. I wondered briefly what would happen now that the Reverend had passed, but was torn from my thoughts as I watched Mrs. Weber turn back towards the trees. She looked so tired and frail, the past few weeks having taken so much out of her.

After a few moments she made her way from the cemetery, stopping only when she saw me open the car door. She met me halfway, opening her arms for the hug she knew I had for her.

"Benjamin. You came."

"I did. I'm sorry I wasn't inside for the service, Mrs. Weber."

"It's all right dear, I understand. I'm just glad that you were here." She looked back towards the cemetery. "It's been a long day, but he is finally at rest." Studying me for a moment, she sighed and patted me gently on the arm. "Angela will be glad you're here, dear."

I nodded, unsure how to respond. It seemed an odd way to phrase things, but I knew what she meant by it. I cleared my throat, looking over her shoulder quickly. "I'm just going to go and pay my respects, Mrs. Weber. I will stop at the house before I head out."

Nodding, she moved towards the path. "Take your time, Ben. We'll see you afterwards."

I watched as she made her way down the same path the twins had taken and then headed towards the cemetery. I pulled my jacket around me tightly and zipped it up, the bitter evening wind adding an unnecessary chill to the task at hand.

I can't even put into words the emotions I felt when I saw her. It was a moment that I had dreamed about a thousand times, albeit not for such sad circumstances, but the joy that overcame me was indescribable. I stood in awed silence as she placed a flower on her father's grave, whispering a soft farewell.

"Angela? It's really you isn't it?" The words were out of my mouth before I could even think. I felt my heart race as she seemed to turn to stone in front of me, her eyes glued to the ground in front of her.

Wanting nothing more than to run and wrap my arms around her, I took a step forward. Her reaction was immediate and I froze at her request to not go any closer. The last thing I wanted was to scare her and have her take off before I even had a chance to speak to her.

I raised my hands in front of me, hoping she would see that I meant no harm. "Angela, please don't go. Look at me, please." I whispered, praying she wouldn't run.

It seemed an eternity before her eyes finally met mine, but when it finally happened I was mesmerized by the vision in front of me. Gone was the demure young girl that hid behind her camera. The exotic creature that stood before me was poised and graceful – almost angelic.

"Hello, Ben." Her voice was airy and soft when she finally spoke and I stood silently watching, almost expecting her to disappear into thin air.

So many questions streamed through my mind, but I hesitated asking even one for fear of her reaction. Instead, I simply smiled and responded in kind. I motioned towards a bench that sat by the gate. "I am just going to sit over there for a bit. Will you join me?"

I didn't wait for an answer, but turned my back to her, praying she would not take the opportunity to disappear. I walked slowly towards the bench and sat; pleased to see that although she had made no move towards me – she was still here.

"It's been a long time, Ang. It's so good to see you." I cleared my throat and looked back towards her home. "We've all missed you." When she didn't respond, I continued. "Your Dad never gave up hope, you know. He always believed that you would come back home someday, although it was hard at times for him to hold it together."

"I saw him." She startled me, not with her words, but how she had appeared almost in front of me as she said them. I nodded and she continued. "I saw him in the hospital just before…" She turned back towards the stone quickly and then to me. "I have to go, Ben. You can't tell anyone you saw me, please?"

I stood quickly. "Angela, please. You can't just appear out of nowhere and then ask me to simply forget!" Before the words were out of my mouth, she was at my side, her hand on my arm. I stared in wonder into her beautiful golden eyes and fought the urge to press my lips against hers. Everything about her seemed to pull me in as if I were a moth caught in a spider's web. I breathed in deeply, trying to calm myself only to lose myself even more to her sweet fragrance. "I can't let you go," I whispered.

"Ben, you have to. I can't stay." I felt my body relax and slump to the bench; her murmurs hypnotizing my entire being. I felt her hand move soothingly through my hair and I leaned my head into her palm, stunned by her icy touch yet comforted at the same time. "Goodbye."

A shiver ran across my shoulders and I sat up quickly, pulling my jacket tight around my chest. Realizing I had passed out, my eyes darted around the cemetery frantically searching for her but knowing without doing so that she was gone. The warmth that had filled my chest when I saw her had vanished as well, silently confirming her departure.

Leaning forward, I buried my head in my hands, the loss of her as strong at that moment as it had been fifteen years previous. I felt the damp against my cheeks and didn't fight the sorrow. I had lost so much in my life and to have her appear and then lose her again without even having a chance to talk was devastating.

I was so engrossed in my pain that I nearly had a heart attack when I felt a firm grip on my shoulder. Rearing back to confront my attacker, I immediately calmed. "You shouldn't sneak up on someone like that, man!"

"Well Ben, I wouldn't exactly call me yelling your name for the last five minutes, sneaking!" Dropping onto the bench beside me, I stared in confusion at my best friend.

"Whaddya mean you've been calling my name, Jake?" I had heard nothing but the wind rushing through the trees since Angela left me.

"I mean that when you didn't show up at the diner, I took a chance that you were still out here. She was here wasn't she?" I watched Jake closely as he seemed to bristle with tension.

"Who was here?" I looked around aimlessly, hoping he would drop it.

"Don't, Ben. Don't even try it. You know exactly _who_ I mean." Standing, he moved across the ground in front of me, leaning against one of the tall stones, his arms crossed. "I warned you to stay away from this, man."

"I don't know what you're talking about, Jake." Shoving my hands in my pockets, I stood. "C'mon let's go grab a burger and get some coffee. It's freezing out here!"

We trudged in silence back to the parking lot. I knew without a doubt that the conversation was far from over, but I wasn't ready to hear all the reasons I needed to stay away. Angela was here, in Forks, and I was determined to see her again – with or without Jake's help. He was the one who had given me the idea to come looking for her in the first place, even if he hadn't meant to.

"I'll be right behind you. Don't even think of trying to ditch me, Cheney!"

"Now why would I do that, Black? Seems to me you were buyin'!" I retorted as I slid into the driver's seat. I chuckled as he drove past me, offering me the one-fingered salute in response. Pulling out, I followed his tail lights, preparing myself for the conversation that I knew lay ahead. It was going to be a long night.

* * *

_**End of Chapter - hmmm...I wonder what Jake has to say...**_


	10. Tough Talk

_**A/N – Well here we are again…not such a wait this time! Thanks to everyone for all the wonderful feedback – it means the world to me! I have been a bit of a fail at responding to reviews lately, but I have read and appreciated every single one! **_

_**Many thanks and much love to my partner in crime, changedbyEdward – she betas like a rockstar and always comes up with outstanding lyrics – LOVES ya bb!**_

_**FYI – I am off for a MUCH needed vacation as of next week so posting may be a bit off but I will do my best to not make you wait too long.**_

_**Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight – I continue to borrow! No copyright infringement intended. **_

* * *

_**Raven hair and ruby lips  
Sparks fly from her finger tips  
Echoed voices in the night  
She's a restless spirit on an endless flight**_

_**Well, I know you want to love her  
Let me tell you brother  
She's been sleeping  
In the devil's bed.**_

_**Woo hoo, witchy woman  
See how high she flies  
Woo hoo, witchy woman  
she got the moon in her eyes**_

_**- The Eagles -**_

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

I darted through the trees and away from the cemetery as swiftly as my feet would carry me, resisting the urge to turn back and kiss Ben the way I so wanted to. Knowing that no good could come from that, I allowed another emotion to take hold. Fury surged through my veins towards the one person I knew had a hand in our impromptu reunion – she would be piecing her favourite Louis Vuitton's together with tweezers and crazy glue by the time I was finished with them.

"Now what did those boots ever do to deserve such a fate?" I whirled around as the demon pixie dropped from the tree behind me.

"Alice!" I hissed and flew towards her, only to find myself slamming into the tree she had just dropped from. I knew better; I would never catch her unless she wanted to be caught, but my frustration with the situation had clouded my better judgement. I scowled at the hand she offered as she stood over me. "Please!" I muttered sarcastically, scrambling to my feet and leaping immediately to perch myself on the large boulder that edged the clearing.

"I really don't understand why you're so upset, Ang. Weren't you happy to see Ben after all this time?"

"Happy, Alice? Really? You're asking me if I was happy? The only boy I ever loved who _oh, by the way_, is now an extremely attractive man that happens to have the most delectable scent and you're asking me if I was _happy_ to see him?" I scowled at the first sign of her Cheshire grin. "No, Alice. I wasn't happy to see him. It only reminded me, on a day that I already lost so much, that I am alone."

The smile disappeared from Alice's face immediately. "But Angela, it doesn't have to be that way and you aren't alone."

I stared at her, momentarily stunned into silence as she leapt onto the boulder and dropped beside me. "You can't seriously be thinking what I think you're thinking." The flicker of hope in her eyes told me she was plotting exactly that. "Alice! I am not doing this!" Dropping from the rock, I flew across the grass and jumped up into the cedar, distancing myself.

"You love him, Angela. You never stopped."

"That, dear sister, is beside the point. The point being that Ben is very much alive while in case you haven't noticed, I am a walking corpse!"

"But Angela, that doesn't mean you can't pursue this. Bella and Edward…" She stopped as soon as she saw my reaction.

"Don't even go there, Alice!" I glanced around the clearing. "I can't believe you would even think I would consider putting Ben through that! Do you not remember what happened? Have you simply forgotten that Bella nearly died, numerous times? Not to mention the sorrow and destruction it caused to so many other lives? Chief Swan? Jessica? Lauren? Mike? Not to mention my family? Seriously Alice, what are you thinking?"

"You know, Angela, I really believe that some of Edward's self-loathing seeped into your body when he turned you! I know full well, better than you actually, exactly what happened. I also believe…," she tapped her forehead lightly, "that this is really all of that coming full circle."

"Really? Well if that is what you _believe_, why are we having this conversation out here rather than at the house?" I asked smugly. "I think you didn't want anyone else to know the dangerous game you were playing and sucked me into!"

"Actually, we're having this conversation out here because I was trying to save you from Esme's wrath when you broke her favourite vase trying to attack me!" She dropped from the rock and approached my tree, looking up at me pleadingly. "Ang, I would never steer you wrong. You have to know how much I love you and want you to be happy."

She had the look down pat. She could be a persuasive little fortune teller when she wanted to be. Sighing, I dropped to the ground to face her. "I know that, Ali. But this ends here. I don't want to discuss it any further."

"Angela…"

"No Alice!" I turned towards the direction of the house. "It has been an extremely long day and I would like nothing more than to have a hot shower and curl up and be quiet. Can we please drop this?"

"You are _so_ stubborn!" Alice stomped her foot menacingly and crossed her arms. "Fine. I will drop it…for now."

Shaking my head, I took off running towards the house doing my best to shut out her final ramblings of fate and what lay ahead. Although it was impossible for me to be physically tired, I felt completely wrung out and wanted nothing more than to curl into a ball in my bedroom and lose myself for a few hours. I only hoped I would be given the chance to do so.

* * *

_**(Ben's POV)**_

I was granted a small reprieve from the interrogation that lay ahead. I watched Jake as he devoured a second order of fries on top of the burger platter he had just eaten. The guy truly was a human garbage disposal. Grinning, he eyed the cobbler that the waitress had just placed in front of me along with another coffee.

I raised my fork and waved it at him menacingly. "Don't even think about it, Black. Get your own dessert."

"Yeah, but you took the last piece of cobbler!"

I chuckled. "Ya win some…" I shoved a bite of the berry concoction into my mouth and moaned, "Ya lose some."

"I swear, sometimes you two are like a couple of twelve year olds!" Sherry, our waitress chided as she dropped a plate in front of Jake. "It's peach pie, Jacob. Your favourite!"

Grinning like the cat that swallowed the canary, Jake stabbed his fork into the tart. "Thanks Sher!"

She ruffled his hair and smiled, heading off to clear the table across the restaurant from us. Jake devoured it in all of three bites and then shoved the plate to the side, his face suddenly serious. "Alright Cheney, spill it."

"You really want to get into this here, Jake?"

Jake looked around the diner quickly. Except for one other table, we were the only customers. "Quit stalling, Ben. You saw her, didn't you?"

"Mrs. Weber? Yeah I saw her. Spoke to her for a few minutes after the service - just before I went in to pay my respects."

Jake's eyes darkened significantly. "This isn't a game, Ben. I know she was there!"

I crossed my arms and leaned back in the chair. "This has nothing to do with you."

"You know damn well that this has everything to do with me," Jake responded coldly. "Alright Ben, have it your way, but I know she was there. Her stench is all over you – so don't even try and tell me that she wasn't. Don't you get it? She's dead! And if you know what's good for you – you'll stay as far away from her as you can!"

"She wouldn't hurt me, Jake. I trust her."

"This is what you don't get, Cheney. She's not the same girl you were all wrapped up in fifteen years ago. She's a walking freaking corpse that enjoys nothing more than a bloody Mary and I don't mean the drink!" Jake tossed some money onto the table, a look of disgust plastered across his face. "Whatever man. You aren't even listening to what I'm saying to you. Just don't expect me to be there to clean up the shit you're about to get yourself into."

I watched him storm towards the door muttering a quick goodbye to Sherry on his way out. She looked over at me, her eyes full of questions and I simply shook my head and shrugged.

Later that night as I lay in bed trying to fall asleep, I replayed our discussion in my mind. I understood where he was coming from and knew he was just trying to look out for me – something he had been doing for a long while now. It was strange how we had become such good friends. I had met him a couple of times through Angela's friend, Bella Swan, but didn't really get to know him until he joined the search party for Angela when she went missing.

_Day after day people from both the town and the reservation came out to show support as we looked for her, but as time went on most gave up hope until it was only Ang's family, Jacob and me. I was so lost at that point, but having his help meant a lot, especially when I knew how upset he was about the Chief's death and Bella's mental breakdown._

_What I didn't realize until the final day we searched, was that he had been joining us all along for our own protection. I felt the hair on my arms stand on end as I remembered that fateful day. We had been searching for hours, wandering the stretch of forest that skirted the Quileute land. I hadn't really been paying attention to where I was going, my hopes in finding her pretty much lost. I heard Jake call my name and the next thing I knew I was flying against a tree, a mammoth wolf snarling and snapping as it backed up against me, almost as if it were standing guard. Terrified, my eyes flew in the direction the wolf was growling and that was when I saw her. Flowing red hair and skin as pale as snow, I knew with one look that although she was beautiful – she was lethal. Her glowing ruby eyes intoxicated me, invisible tethers pulling me towards her. The monstrous canine turned its head and stared at me coldly, almost as if it was trying to communicate with me and in a flash it was gone, along with the enchantress._

_I sat gasping for breath, immediately realizing that Jake was missing. Afraid that the wolf hadn't been alone, I feared the worst and began racing through the forest, calling out for him to answer me. I ran and ran, finally dropping at the base of a tree, gasping for breath. Jake appeared out of nowhere and I told him everything I had seen, grasping almost instantly that he had vanished the moment that the wolf had appeared._

_At that moment, I realized that he had saved my life. Stories had run rampant the first few weeks after Angela and the others had disappeared – everything from witchcraft to vampires to werewolves. All the things that went bump in the night. But as the town went back to normal, the stories faded away and the deaths and disappearances were simply chalked up to drifters. I knew at that moment that the town had been right with their first assumption. There were things that went bump in the night – my new friend being one of them._

_At first, I didn't let on to Jake that I knew, but I didn't have to. As we made our way out towards where we had parked, he quietly told me that it would be best if we called off the search for Angela. I didn't argue, assuming the worst._

_Time passed and word came that Bella Swan had taken her life when she learned of her father's murder. Knowing that Jake must have been devastated, I pulled myself out of my own dark hole and made my way down to the Quileute reservation to see him._

_We wandered down to First Beach, chatting about everything but the large white elephant crowding the room. When we reached the fire pit, he dropped onto a log and I sat across from him._

_"I know you have questions, Ben. You may as well ask, but I can't promise that you are going to like what I have to say."_

_I was surprised by his words, but took the opportunity and ran with it. Staring off into the distance, I watched the waves lap against the shore and began to tell him my theory. It was all I could do to get it out, the story seeming more a crazy ghost tale than reality, but I lay it all out…that I believed he had morphed into a werewolf to protect me from what I could only assume was a blood-thirsty vampire. Possibly the same vampire that had killed several classmates of mine, the Chief of Police and the girl that had stolen my heart._

_What I hadn't expected was for Jake to listen without interruption and then validate almost everything I had chalked up to said creepy fairy-tale. And I hadn't expected the rest of the story he shared with me that day, and for that reason alone I needed to give his warnings some credence._

Sighing heavily, I brought a pillow over my face trying to shut out everything and let sleep overtake me. And it almost worked, except for the haunting amber eyes that burned through my soul – the same way they had when they were warm and alive.

* * *

_**End of Chapter - I wonder what Ben will do next?**_


	11. Even Now

_**A/N - Where do I begin with the apologies? I am SOOOO sorry it has taken me this long to get another chapter up! The vacation was fabulous, but I was a complete FAIL at writing. But here, long overdue I know, is the latest chapter and I promise we are back to a more regular posting schedule. Hope you enjoy!**_

_**Much love to my rocking beta, changedbyEdward for the super speedy beta job and once again being a lyric genius!**_

_**Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.**_

* * *

**_When we last left our dear Angela, she was threatening poor Alice's favourite pair of boots for putting her in the situation of seeing her beloved Ben again. Ben, on the other hand, was being read the riot act by his dear friend, Jake, on messing with things that go bump in the night...and we learned a bit of how they became friends...and now we continue..._**

_Even now, when I have come so far  
I wonder where you are  
I wonder why it's still so hard without you  
Even now, when I come shining through  
I swear I think of you  
And how I wish you knew  
Even Now._

_Even now, when I never hear your name  
And the world has changed so much since you've been gone  
Even now I still remember, and the feeling's still the same  
And the pain inside of me goes on and on  
Even Now._

_- Barry Manilow –_

* * *

_**(Jake's POV)**_

Punching the steering wheel with my fist, I tore out of the parking lot. I wanted nothing more than to pull off to the side of the road, phase and run into the dark abyss of the night, but that meant sharing my thoughts with the rest of the pack. Their input was the last thing I wanted or needed.

Turning off the highway, I drove along one of the old logging roads, finally coming to a stop when I neared my destination. I ran into the trees, breathing in the night air in hope that it would clear my mind. Losing myself to the feel of the wind on my face, I ran as fast as my human legs could carry me – only stopping when I cleared the brush and came to the spot I was searching for.

Dropping to the ground, I leaned back against a boulder and buried my head in my hands. The memory of her was as strong now as it had been the day that we said goodbye. The Bella I had known and loved was gone and she had become one of them, but even as a bloodsucker I couldn't completely let her go. A part of me would never be able to, but I had resigned myself to a distant friendship, knowing that I preferred that over not ever hearing from her again.

And so we had remained friends – pen pals you could say. From time to time I would get postcards from all the exotic places she and that pathetic ghost she called her husband travelled to. I kept them all, tiny snippets of the girl I had loved who would never be mine. It was easy to pretend she was simply off exploring the world, but reality hit when the phone call came.

"_Jake?" My heart sputtered as I stared at the phone for a moment, stunned that she had actually called._

"_Bella? Is that you?"_

_Her bell-like laugh warmed my heart, but sickened me at the same time as I reminded myself that she was no longer human. "Is something wrong Bella? I didn't expect to hear from you."_

"_Jake, I'm calling because we need to come into Forks for a few days, possibly a week. I just wanted to give you a heads-up."_

"_Why Bella? Why are you coming back here? I don't know if enough time has passed…"_

"_Jake, we're coming back because of Reverend Weber." _

"_Bella, I'm not sure it's a good idea…"_

"_Jake, we have to…" Her voice went silent on the other end of the line and all of a sudden it made sense._

"_Who's coming with you, Bells?" I asked quietly, hoping I wasn't right, but knowing in my heart that she was about to confirm my suspicion._

"_I think you already know, Jacob." _

_Clearing my throat, I closed my eyes. "How long has Angela been with you, Bella? Who changed her? What else have you been hiding?" My anger was obvious but it couldn't be helped. She must have known how long we had looked for Angela, yet she had said nothing._

"_Jacob, please. She needs to have the opportunity to say goodbye." _

"_Bella, you didn't answer my questions…"_

"_Jacob! What's done is done. Angela's with us and lives the same lifestyle as we do. No one will even know we are there!"_

_Her vague response did little to reassure me, but I knew even then that she still controlled me more than I could ever let on. There was no denying her wish – even though I knew it was crazy to allow her to return._

"_Will I see you?" The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them and I slapped my hand against my forehead in frustration._

"_Well…if you think you can stand the stench of me!" She laughed into the phone and I chuckled along with her. _

"_Just stand down wind of me."_

"_I could say the same thing, Jacob!" We had both laughed at that and it amazed me how easily we were able to put our differences behind us and fall back into our old friendship._

Pulling myself back to the present, I slammed my fist against the ground. I had been so lost in the moment of speaking with her that I hadn't even considered the repercussions of them returning to Forks. More specifically, the repercussions of Angela Weber returning.

And now I would pay for that error in judgement. Ben had become my dearest friend – the one person who knew everything about me and still stuck around. How I could have been so stupid in believing that this would not affect him was beyond me.

I knew how he had suffered when Angela disappeared. I remembered the look of despair on his face when he had feared the worst. I also remembered the glimmer of hope that flashed in his eyes when he learned of my abilities and that vampires and such did exist. But time passed and I really believed that he had moved on. I knew there was no one serious in his life, but I also knew he hadn't been a saint while he was away at college.

He had come back to Forks shortly after his mother fell ill and it was as though he had never been gone. He hadn't had a lot of free time but we still fit in a few fishing trips here and there. Shortly after his mother passed away, he toyed with the idea of leaving, but that thought soon passed when his father was diagnosed with cancer. Losing both his parents so quickly had been tough on him, but he had held things together.

I was surprised when he decided not to sell his family's home and instead announced he wasn't ready to leave Forks yet. It should have dawned on me when he renewed his friendship with the Webers that he had an agenda, but I knew he was grieving and assumed that the Reverend was the support he needed at that time.

And maybe that had been the case. But it wasn't the only reason. I knew now that he had been waiting for her all along. The look in his eye when he blatantly lied about seeing her was undeniable. There was a fire there – a spark I had not seen in his eyes since the day at the beach so long before.

He couldn't actually be considering the possibility of a relationship with her, could he? I knew he understood that the day I saved him from the red-headed bloodsucker that they were dangerous, vile creatures. I had stressed to him that we existed to protect humans from these evil beings and that if there was even a remote possibility that Angela had been turned – she would not be the same person.

I had never told him that Bella still existed. I knew that if he had known, he would have never given up on the idea that Angela had somehow survived. But none of that mattered now. There was no denying that Angela had been in that cemetery and that he had seen her. If I had any chance of saving my friend from a certain death, I needed to see Bella and make sure they left and left quickly.

Rising to my feet, I turned with the plan of heading towards the Cullen's only to realize I was no longer alone.

"Hello, Jacob."

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

I listened in silence as the battle raged below. I had escaped to my room as soon as I made it to the house, but it hadn't been long before Edward had obviously taken a waltz through my mind and he was now in the process of tearing a strip off of my meddling sister.

A light tap at the door drew my attention away from the flurry of words below and I smiled as Bella popped her head in through the doorway.

"Is it ok if I come in here and hide out with you?"

I nodded and moved back to lean against the headboard, hugging a pillow to my chest. "Sure thing, this could go on for hours."

"Don't I know it!" Bella chuckled as she hopped onto the bed beside me. "So…how are you doing?"

"Hasn't Edward given you an up-to-date on the status of my sanity?" I asked mockingly.

"Ang, you know he is only being protective of you. He cares about you and hated to see you going through this alone."

Sighing, I buried my face in the pillow. "I know….but it's just so frustrating to not be able to hide anything from him!"

"I know, Ang…and he knows it too. If there was a way he could block you, he would, but the connection is just so strong…"

I nodded, knowing Bella was right. Edward and I had learned through the years that even though the rest of the family were able to block him at times – I could not. And although he was able to refrain from reading their thoughts when he tried, my mind appeared to be like a flashing billboard for his perusal anytime we were close.

The slam of the door was followed by another crash in the distance and Bella and I glanced at each other warily as Alice made her presence known outside my door.

Ignoring my less than welcoming tone, she skipped into the room and dropped onto the edge of the bed. "He can be so melodramatic!"

"What did you expect, Alice? You can't seriously think he would be happy that you basically let Angela walk into what could have been a dangerous situation!"

"Please. Have I ever led any of you wrong before?" Alice huffed. She raised her hand at Bella to silence her. "And don't even go there regarding your birthday, Bella!"

Shaking her head, Bella turned to me. "Do you want to talk about it, Ang? It must have been strange seeing him again."

Alice's eyes twinkled and I scowled at her reaction. "I don't want to talk about it. It happened and it's over so we can all just forget about it because I will be on my way back to Scotland in the morning."

"So soon?" I could see the disappointment in Bella's face and I leaned over, hugging her shoulders.

"I can't stay, Bella. I came to say goodbye and I did and it's just too hard to be here." I ignored Alice's icy glare. "Besides, Christmas isn't that far away and I hear Alice has wonderful things planned for Alaska."

"Don't even go there, Angela! You can't just leave." Alice crossed her arms and pouted.

"That is exactly what I am going to do, Ali. I refuse to have this conversation with you. I am not seeing Ben again – I do not want to see Ben again. Drop it!"

"Are you so sure about that, Darlin'?" I stared at Jasper as he leaned against my doorway. "Because that is not the vibe I am getting from you."

"Wow, does my door have a 'feel free to enter' sign or something?" I scowled as Jasper shrugged and moved further into the room, claiming a seat at his wife's side. "I love you all dearly, but I just really want to be alone right now."

"Ang, don't shut us out. You know that…" Bella's words were cut short as her attention diverted from the conversation to Alice. "Alice? What is it? What do you see?"

Jasper held his wife close, murmuring to her as we waited for the vision to release her. Her premonitions always unnerved me as I feared that there would come a time that she would not make it back to us. I sighed in relief when she once again became coherent. The relief was short-lived however when I saw the worry in her eyes.

"What's wrong, Alice?" I asked worriedly.

"It's Edward. I can't see him!"

"What?" Bella was off the bed in a flash and down the stairs, with us close behind.

"Bella! Wait!" Jasper caught her arm and she growled as he held her back. "It could be a trap."

"Let me go, Jazz! I have to find him!"

"It could be the wolves," Alice said calmly from the doorway. "But if that's the case, we don't know which one and we can't be guaranteed that they will all stand by the treaty."

"I can't believe they would break it, Alice. They have always been true to their word – it is a code of honour to them," Carlisle stated as he and Esme met us by the door, "but we should try and track Edward in case things were to become a little heated."

Jasper nodded in agreement. "He and Jacob do tend to bring out the worst in each other."

"What are we waiting for?" Bella was the first out the door with the rest of us following, unsure of what we would find, but hoping that we would make it to him before all hell broke loose.

* * *

_**End of chapter - oh what kind of mess does poor Edward have himself in now?**_


	12. Take a Look at Me Now

**__**

**_A/N - Here we are...just over a week this time so not so bad, right? I have been an absolute fail at responding to reviews but read every one and appreciate all the support...even though this isn't an "Edward and Bella" story. Thanks to all who have taken the time to leave me their thoughts!_**

**_My amazing beta and lyric genius is changedbyEdward...loves you bunches bb!_**

**_Stephenie Meyer is the creative genius behind everything Twilight and owns it all. I am just borrowing - no copyright infringement intended!_**

* * *

__

_How can I just let you walk away  
Just let you leave without a trace?  
When I stand here taking every breath with you... Ooh  
You're the only one, who really knew me at all.  
How can you just walk away from me, when all I can do is watch you leave?  
'Cause we shared that laughter and the pain, and even shared the tears.  
You're the only one who really knew me at all.  
I wish I could just make you turn around, turn around and see me cry.  
There's so much I need to say to you.  
So many reasons why.  
You're the only one who really knew me at all.  
So take a look at me now  
Well there's just an empty space  
And there's nothing left here to remind me  
Just the memory of your face.  
Now take a look at me now  
'Cause there's just an empty space  
But to wait for you  
Is all I can do  
And that's what I've got to face._

_- Phil Collins -_

* * *

_**(Ben's POV)**_

I stared out the window and watched the sun make its splash against the cool morning sky. The first cloudless day in weeks should have brought a smile to my face, but instead all I could do was continue to wrestle with the thoughts and emotions that had jumbled through my brain since she had left me in the cemetery.

Jake was obviously worried and a part of me knew that he was right in wanting me to stay as far away from Angela as I could, however, the desire to do the exact opposite was growing inside of me all the time.

Frustrated, I threw the blankets off and stomped to the bathroom, hoping that the pulsing spray of a hot shower would clear my head. As the water pounded against my skin, I closed my eyes and replayed the previous day's events in my mind.

I had always hoped that somehow she had survived and discovering Jake's 'gift' had only fed that idea, but actually seeing her had been shocking to say the least. She was different – there was no way to miss how all the little quirks about the girl I had fallen for so long ago had been perfected, but she was still Angela. Her voice was softer, richer and almost angelic yet still carried a familiar tone. But the one thing I was most certain of was that no matter what she had become, my heart still belonged to only her.

I understood Jake's fears but they were his and his alone, because deep down I knew that she would not harm me. Jake's warnings continued to play through my mind as I dressed, making me realize that perhaps he had known more than he had let on. _Why had he been so convinced that Angela was there in the first place? Did he know all along that she hadn't died? What else was he not telling me?_

Determined to get some answers, I called his cell only to have the voicemail pick up immediately. I left him a brief message to get back to me and headed out to start my day. My earlier plans to work on the house were put on hold as I swung out of the driveway and found myself heading in the direction of First Beach.

Pulling up in front of the faded red clapboard bungalow, I scanned the area for Jake, not wanting to disturb Billy if I didn't have to. No luck in seeing his son, I knocked on the door and stood back as I heard the squeak of his old wheelchair approaching the other side of the wall.

"Hey Billy, its Ben." I greeted Jacob's father as the door opened slightly. The years had been difficult for Billy, losing his two best friends within a short span of each other and then the constant worry for his youngest son.

"Good to see you, Ben. Jake isn't here right now, but you're welcome to come in and wait for him." I hesitated, but only for a moment, sensing that he seemed to want the company. I followed him as he wheeled his way back towards the kitchen.

I watched quietly as he poured us each a cup of coffee and nodded my thanks when he sat it in front of me on the table. With that cue, I sat, allowing the brew to warm my hands before taking a sip. A comfortable silence hovered as we both allowed the caffeine to take affect.

"How are the renovations coming along?"

"Pretty good. I'm over halfway on completing the kitchen – the new countertops go in next week and then it is really just odds and ends." I looked up. "Once it's done, you and Jake should come up for dinner."

The old man smiled and nodded. "Sounds good, Ben." Clearing his throat he looked me straight in the eye. "Jake said you went to the service yesterday."

"Sort of." His cocked eyebrow told me that wasn't enough of an answer. "I sat in the car for the service and then paid my respects afterwards."

Billy sat back in his chair, his dark eyes full of questions, yet only nodding in response.

"What else did Jake tell you, Billy?"

"Not much other than he was worried that you were making some bad choices." Billy cleared his throat. "I thought you had more sense than that, Ben."

I leaned back in my chair and stared at the ceiling, the peeling paint an appropriate distraction while I quelled my frustration. The last thing I needed was to get on Billy's bad side.

"It's not always easy to make the right choice when you don't know the whole story, Billy." I waited, hoping that he would take the bait.

"That is something you need to take up with Jacob, Ben." Billy pushed away from the table and I moved to follow. "Something tells me, though, that whatever he has to say will have no difference in the end." He reached over for the remote and turned on the television, signalling the end of our conversation. "I'm not sure when he will be back, so why don't you go do whatever you need to and I will have him stop by to see you?"

Realizing I was getting nowhere, I nodded and thanked him for the coffee, more frustrated than ever that I was no further ahead. I sped away from the reservation, only one destination in mind. I had to see her again and if it meant hanging out in a cemetery to do it - that would be what I would do.

* * *

_**(Edward's POV)**_

I ran through the brush, cursing Alice's idiocy with every step. _What was she thinking? _Growling in frustration I slammed my fist into the nearest tree trunk and watched as the roots tore up from the earth and it toppled to the ground.

It had been dangerous enough for us to return to Forks so soon, but for Alice to have blatantly put Angela in that situation was simply too much. _It was bad enough that Ben saw her, but what if she had drawn the attention of one of the wolves? A newborn, outnumbered!_

And she had simply stood there, staring at me like I had two heads, while I pointed out all the horrible things that could have happened.

"_But Edward, I KNEW what was going to happen!"_ I could still hear the condescending tone of that comment. Sometimes my sister took her visions just a little too far and I was afraid that we were going to have to face serious consequences one of these days because of her. Hell, we already had with Bella!

The hideous smell of wet fur overwhelmed my senses, pulling me from my thoughts. Recognizing the foul odor and the mind that went with it, I pushed ahead, only stopping when he was finally within my sight.

"Hello, Jacob."

Surprisingly I had startled him, pulling him away from his own curious thoughts. Thoughts that I knew he did not want me to see, although the snippets of Bella I caught before he masked his mind from me were enough to raise my irritation.

"What are you doing here, leech?" His voice was full of malice, but I sensed his nervousness and knew he was not comfortable I had found him alone.

"Well, it's good to see you too. It's nice to see that you haven't changed since we last met." I smirked as I caught the worry in his thoughts of exactly what I had read. "Don't worry, Jake. I have more to worry about than your immature fantasies about my wife."

I watched as Jake's fists clenched against his sides. He was agitated; I had no doubt of that. "Stay out of my head," he snarled.

Shrugging, I took a step towards him. "Or what?" Another step. "Looks like you're out here on your own. I'd say we're pretty evenly matched."

"What Edward? Are you so insecure about your relationship with Bella that you have to taunt me into a fight? What are you gonna do? Tell her I attacked you?"

Chuckling, I shook my head. "Insecure is about the last thing I am. Bella made her choice a long time ago." Each word seemed to stir him up more; his arms bristling, aching to phase. "What are you waiting for, Jake?"

"Enough! Both of you!" Bella appeared from nowhere, positioning herself between the two of us.

_Another time, another place, leech! _Jacob thought as he pulled himself together. "Hey, Bells."

"Don't 'hey Bells' me, Jacob! Seriously! When are the two of you going to grow up?"

I chuckled and then stepped back as the wrath of my wife turned to face me, her manicured nail pressed against my chest. "Bella, love…"

"And you! Purposely trying to provoke him into a fight! Honestly Edward, what were you thinking?" Her eyes flashed at me angrily and I understood immediately that I had some serious grovelling to do.

"I'm sorry, love."

It was Jacob's turn to snort in amusement. "Nice." His attention turned away from us in the next moment as he took in the rest of the family, eyeing them warily, his eyes locking at last with Angela's. "I see the gang's all here…well at least the ones that returned." He turned back to Bella. "Are you going to explain to me now?"

"Explain what?" I raised my eyebrow in question.

"How your little coven is up by one, leech," Jacob responded coldly.

"Jake!" Bella hissed.

He crossed his arms in response. "Sorry, Bella."

"What does it matter, Jake?" Bella took a step towards him. "Angela won't hurt anyone…she's one of us."

Jacob snorted. "Really, Bells? Well I never would have guessed that she 'was one of you.' That's exactly my point. And you say she won't hurt anyone, but what if she just can't help herself? I wouldn't know anyone like that, would you?" His eyes burned in anger.

"Stop talking about me as if I'm not even here." I watched Angela move towards Bella, and I snickered as the mutt instinctively took a step back. "I don't know what you're getting at, Jake but I'm not a threat."

"Then how come your stench was all over Ben when I found him at the cemetery last night?" Jacob questioned, his voice cold. "Why did you let him see you if you don't plan to change him?"

"I would never hurt Ben!" Angela shrilled, her emotions getting the best of her.

"Angela…" I spoke softly, her eyes meeting mine pleadingly. I nodded and she stepped away. "She didn't mean for him to see her, Jacob. She had no idea he would even be there." I scowled at Alice as she and Jasper stood off to the side, ready to jump in if needed.

"I didn't." Her voice now calm, she turned back to face Jake. "He saw me before I had a chance to leave, but I didn't hurt him. I could never hurt him."

"But you have hurt him. He was devastated when you were taken. And now, after all this time and after all that he is lost, here you are. If there had been any chance of him moving on, Angela, any chance of him meeting someone and falling in love and having a life – it disappeared when he saw you."

"Jake, that's enough!" Bella moved towards Angela, wrapping an arm around her. "What happened to Angela all those years ago was not her fault and you can't blame her for it. We had no idea that Ben would even still be here in Forks, but sometimes fate steps in."

"Fate or a fortune teller who should know better," I muttered, knowing Alice would hear me.

"_You'll see I'm right about this Edward, when am I not?"_ Alice's thoughts were loud and clear and I shook my head at her overzealous confidence.

"You and fate, Bella. That seems to be your answer for everything. Wasn't that your reasoning when I questioned how you became a vampire?" The disgust in Jacob's voice was obvious. "Whether it was fate or not, it doesn't change anything and it doesn't change the rules of the treaty."

"No one here has any intention of breaking the rules of the treaty, Jacob," Carlisle chimed in, "but might I remind you that you have bent those rules more than once yourself."

"How?" Jacob demanded.

"Your part of the treaty states that you were to keep our existence a secret, and you appear to have been unable to do so, first with Bella and now Ben, seeing as how he didn't seem to be surprised by her transformation."

"I didn't tell Ben, he found out on his own." Jacob paused, kicking a stone at his foot. "We were looking for Angela shortly after she went missing and Victoria cornered him."

"Oh my God!" Angela gasped. "How did he get away?"

"I got between the two of them, in wolf form." Jacob's tone softened, reacting to Angela's obvious distress. "He put two and two together and I couldn't deny it. He had been through so much already and somehow he seemed to be able to let go after that."

"Thank you, Jacob. Thank you for saving him." Angela moved towards him but thinking better of it, stopped. "I promise you that you did not save him in vain. He won't see me again – I'm leaving right away."

Jacob stared at her for a moment, jaw set. "Not that I'm not ecstatic to hear those words, but don't you get it? It's already too late. He will never let it go that you are still out there, somewhere." Stepping towards the forest, he prepared to leave, but not before staking Angela in the heart with his final words. "You've already killed him."

His words resonated around us as we stood helplessly watching Angela collapse to the ground.

* * *

_**End of Chapter - well that was a little harsh, wasn't it?**_


	13. Ain't No Sunshine

_**A/N – Happy New Year! I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday season! I am beginning to feel like a broken record, but please accept my sincere apologies for the delay in posting. The holidays snuck up on me this year and hit me like a tidal wave…I literally have not stopped running since mid-December. We had family home for the holidays and it was wonderful, but quite chaotic and definitely not writer-friendly! Anyhow I am back and promise that things will be back to normal!**_

_**I would like to thank those of you who have stuck with the story…there is a lot more to come! Mucho love and hugs to my beta, changedbyEdward, for her quick turnaround with this chapter - I would be lost without ya bb!**_

_**As always, Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight and I am just borrowing – no copyright infringement intended.**_

* * *

_**Previously on CWYWF….**_

_**Ben heads to La Push and has a bit of a chat with Billy – getting no answers and leaves even more frustrated than before. Deciding he has to see Angela again, he heads for the cemetery. Meanwhile Edward and Jacob come face to face and it isn't friendly. Barbs are thrown – but it is Angela who is devastated the most by Jacob telling her that she has already destroyed Ben's chances at a happy life.**_

* * *

_Ain't no sunshine when she's gone.  
It's not warm when she's away.  
Ain't no sunshine when she's gone  
And she's always gone too long anytime she goes away._

Wonder this time where she's gone,  
Wonder if she's gone to stay  
Ain't no sunshine when she's gone  
And this house just ain't no home anytime she goes away.

_- Bill Withers –_

* * *

_**(Ben's POV)**_

The hours crept by as I watched the late morning sun move its way leisurely across the horizon. It had been ridiculous to think that she would actually return here; I wasn't even sure she was still in the area, but still I waited.

Restless, I stood and wandered the parameter again, my senses in overdrive for any sign of movement.

"Ben?" I was rewarded, but not by the Weber I hoped for. I turned and watched as Angela's mother made her way into the cemetery. "I must admit I'm surprised to find you here, especially when we didn't see you at the house last night."

I opened my mouth to respond, but she patted my arm when she finally reached my side. "It's alright dear, there's no need to explain." She looked across the hallowed ground, her eyes coming to rest on the fresh grave where her husband lay. "I'm just glad you are here now," she whispered softly as she dabbed at the tears that flowed freely down her cheeks.

I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and guided her to the closest bench. We sat in silence for a few moments, both consumed in our own heartache. How I wished I could lighten her load with the news that I had seen her daughter, but Angela had begged me not to reveal her to anyone. Even if my greatest fear of never seeing her again came to fruition, I would abide by her wishes. And I really was unsure how Mrs. Weber would react to the news that her eldest child still…lived? The air rushed from my chest as I fought to control the wave of emotions that crashed over me.

It had been so easy for me to bask in the glory of seeing her again – so easy that I had ignored the most obvious thing. Yes, she had stood with me here in the cemetery and I knew for a fact that she still walked this earth, but in my heart of hearts I knew that she was not the same person I had lost. No matter what had happened though, I could not accept that she was any danger like the red-headed witch Jacob had saved me from that fateful day. I stood by my resolve that no matter what had happened to Angela she meant me no harm.

Shaking myself out of my reverie, I turned to find Mrs. Weber watching me carefully, her eyebrow slightly cocked in the same manner I had seen Angela do so many times.

"There's something different about you, Benjamin. You seem…at peace."

I smiled gently. "Do I? Perhaps it's the company I'm keeping."

Mrs. Weber chuckled lightly and patted my hand again. "You're a dear and I don't expect you to tell me your secret. I am just relieved to see the light in your eyes again. It hasn't been there…in a long time." Her voice tightened slightly and once again I fought the urge to reveal all.

Sighing, I squeezed her hand and stood, helping her up from our seat. The sun had dipped down behind the horizon and the air was cooling quickly. "I may look peaceful, but my grumbling stomach is about to argue otherwise. There wouldn't by chance be any of your ginger cookies left, would there?"

"I believe there are a couple left. Let's go and find some coffee and raid the cookie jar, shall we?" She tucked her arm in mine and we strolled towards the parsonage and away from the sadness that lay behind us.

Cookies and coffee became dinner and I found myself pulling out of the Weber's driveway shortly after 8 pm, sated and content. The evening had been full of both laughter and tears as I sat around the table with the twins and Ang's mum, recalling memories of both the Reverend and his daughter. If anything, I was relieved to see how well they were all coping, their faith being the strong beacon that allowed them to trust they would see their loved ones again.

The warmth of that thought soothed my own melancholy as I sat quietly reflecting on my own recent loss. The deaths of my parents had been devastating to say the least. I remembered the call from my father in the middle of the night; his hushed tones and quiet reassurances that she would regain her strength being the only influence I needed to make the trip back to Forks. My father would never have called unless it was bad – no matter how much he was trying to convince me otherwise. The six weeks that followed were painful and frightening as we watched her slowly slip away from us; the cancer spreading more aggressively with each passing day.

In truth, when she finally succumbed to the dreadful disease, it was a blessing. She had suffered so much and all Dad and I had wanted for her at the end was peace.

Summer came and we struggled to put the pieces together of a life without her. Dad did his best to hide his anguish from me, but I knew he was lost without his soul mate. In a way, I understood exactly what he was going through, even though I only had a hint of what true love was really like.

July and August came and went as we filled our time with anything that helped ease the pain. We worked on the house, did a little fishing, caught a few baseball games and bonded as father and son. If only I had seen the signs. I was so wrapped up in keeping us busy that I didn't notice that he was failing. I passed off the fatigue and aching pains he sometimes mentioned as repercussions of our activities; never dreaming that it could be something more.

I wonder now if it was denial. A tumble off the ladder two weeks before Halloween meant a trip to the hospital. I remember the look on Dr. Grant's face when he told us what the x-rays revealed. The world crashed down around me as the man who had so attentively treated my mother told me that my father was headed down the same dark path.

A battery of tests and treatments followed and swept us through the holidays. I watched my father bravely face each challenge and prayed that God would show me some mercy and not strip me of both parents within the same year. However, my prayers fell on deaf ears and the cold month of January brought yet another funeral to Forks. I numbly retreated within myself and considered my options.

I still wonder how I made it through those first few weeks. I'm convinced that if it hadn't been for Jake and the Webers, I most likely would have lost my mind. But each day that passed got a little easier and I finally found my way back to the surface. My first instinct had been to get the hell out of Dodge, sell the house and wash my hands of the memories, but something held me back.

I decided to stick around and finish the renovations Dad and I had started together. And I continued to spend time with the people that mattered. If I had learned anything, it was how quickly you could lose what you loved the most.

Shrugging myself out of the memories, I wandered to the fireplace and threw on another log – the snapping sparks echoed around the empty room as the fire roared back to life. I stared at the photos on the mantle, my eyes moving from frame to frame as I recalled the happy moments with my parents the pictures immortalized. My finger traced against the glass of the final frame and I fought back the tears as I stared at the young face of the only girl I had ever loved.

There was no denying it. Seeing her, no matter how briefly, had brought me back to life. Until that moment, I thought I had lost everyone that had ever held my heart, but that was not the case. She still existed and I would do everything in my power to convince her that I wanted to be a part of her life – no matter what the cost.

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

I moved around the room at lightning speed, shoving items into my suitcases with little thought. I rattled off a list of things I needed to do quickly before making my escape and hissed at the knock on the door that distracted me from my thoughts.

"Go away Alice!" I growled as I continued to whirl around the room.

I flung a boot at the door as it opened and heard the chuckle as it made contact with Jasper's open palm. "Nice pitch, darlin'."

Sticking my tongue out at him, I zipped up my overnight bag and moved it to the door. "What do you want, Jasper?" I didn't look at him as I asked.

Sighing, he moved towards the window seat and dropped into it. "What do I want? Hmm…that's a fairly loaded question, don't you think?" He hummed softly to himself while I continued to pack in silence.

Relaxing slightly, I concentrated on my task at hand, finally zipping the last bag and placing it by the door. Glad to have my packing done, I finally sat, staring at my brother as he continued to hum his melody.

"What Jasper? What do you have to say? Surely you didn't come in here solely to supply me with a soundtrack as I packed?"

Shrugging his shoulders, he stopped humming and sat forward on the bench. "No darlin', I can't say that was my intention, but I knew that you needed to blow off some steam before I said what I came here to say."

"You better not be using your mojo on me, mister!" I eyed him suspiciously even though I knew he wasn't controlling my emotions. Honestly, the anger and stress had dissipated as I packed and all I felt now was relief that I would soon be far away from all the painful memories that Forks held.

"Ang, you know that I love you and have always done my best to support you, right?"

I nodded, knowing that he spoke the truth. Jasper had always been my biggest ally, most recently being the most supportive in convincing Carlisle and Esme that I needed to get away on my own. "I know, Jazz, and I love you for it."

"Then please understand when I tell you this. You are making a huge mistake that you will regret for all eternity if you get on that plane tonight."

I stood, stunned. "Jasper, I…"

"Before you take off on a tirade, hear me out, Ang."

I snapped my mouth shut angrily and motioned for him to proceed.

"I understand how you are feeling and I know how profoundly devastated you are from Jacob's comments." He moved from the window seat and wrapped his arm around my shoulders. "But Ang, no matter how much he meant for those words to pierce your heart, you have to realize that in a way he was right."

Growling I shoved his arm away and flew across the room, turning to face him as my eyes burned with rage. "Thanks Jasper! Don't you know I realize that? Don't you see that is why I am leaving?" I moved to grab my bags and hissed as his hand caught my arm.

"Maybe one of these days you will realize that not everyone is out to get you, sister dear. Now will you please let me finish?"

"Oh please….jab the dagger a little deeper!" I seethed.

"You know that is not what I am trying to do. But you have spent your entire life running away from anything that might cause you pain. Even as a human, you spent your days wishing for more but never biting the bullet and taking the challenge – content to always be the wallflower."

The echo of the slap as my hand connected with his face reverberated around the room and we both stared at each other wordlessly as we heard the rest of the family bound up the stairs. Jasper yelled for everyone to stay out as he rubbed his cheek, eyeing me carefully as he did so.

"I deserved that," he said quietly as he sat again. "I'm sorry Ang, but I had to make sure you still had that fight in you. You have been running from your past since you were changed. It actually surprised me that you even came back for your father and I am not convinced that you would have if you thought he might have pulled through."

His words burned me to the core, but deep down I knew that everything he was saying was true. "Well Jazz, I guess some of us are just meant to be cowards."

"But don't you see, Ang? You are the only one that is giving yourself that title. I know you Angela. I know how you feel inside and I know that although part of you wants to take the easy way out and run…the bigger part of you wants what is being offered to you on a silver platter."

I stared at him in confusion.

"I know you think you are doing what's best for Ben. I understand why you would feel that you can be nothing but dangerous to him. But I also know that he saw you in that cemetery and didn't turn away. He didn't run. In fact, Jacob made it fairly clear that the only running he would be doing is after you – knowing that you are not the girl you once were but not seeming to care."

"But Jasper…"

"Ang, just think about it. I'm not telling you that this is going to be all sunshine and puppies. But I do think that you owe it to Ben and you owe it to yourself to at least see this through and let him make that choice."

"Jazz, I can't. He already knows far more than he should…"

"Exactly Ang. He already knows and he isn't running. Talk to him. Even if it is only to say goodbye. But don't run away because I am telling you now that if you do this will haunt you for the rest of your days."

Squeezing my hand, Jasper left the room without another word. I stared at the door as it closed behind him, his words echoing through my mind as I sat on my bed. Dropping back against the soft comforter, I covered my face with my hands and wished for the peaceful slumber I knew would never come.

* * *

_**End of Chapter - What would you do?**_


	14. Ain't Nobody's Business

_**A/N – And here we are again…and I didn't make you wait forever! Thanks for all the feedback last chap…was interesting to see what you all thought!**_

_**Huge thanks to my beta, changedbyEdward for such a quick turnaround with this chap and once again being a lyric guru! Much love and hugs bb!**_

_**As always, Steph owns all…I own nothin'! **_

* * *

_There ain't nothing I can do, or nothing I can say,  
Some folks will criticize me.  
So I'm gonna do just what I want to anyway,  
And don't care if you all despise me._

If I should take a notion  
To jump into the ocean,  
It ain't nobody's business if I do.

If I go to church on Sunday  
And I shimmy down on Monday,  
It ain't nobody's business if I do.

_- Billie Holliday -_

* * *

**(Angela's POV)**

_How, how could he possibly think that this was a good idea?_

That question travelled through my mind over and over as I lay quietly on the bed. Glancing at the clock I knew whatever I decided, I'd already missed the flight I had been so eager to catch. Closing my eyes, I resumed the silent argument I'd been having with myself from the moment Jasper left me.

The rational side of me knew that what he suggested was ludicrous. There was absolutely no logical reason for me to put Ben in harm's way by seeing him again. All I had to do to prove this was to recall all the dangers Bella's life had been put in by Edward being in her life and we all knew how that had turned out. Not only had it destroyed her humanity…it had taken several others, including me, out of the picture.

_But what if? What if Jacob was right and Ben never moved on? What if he spent the rest of his days trying to find me? What kind of danger had I already put him in from our one chance meeting? What if he would choose this life to be with me?_

"No!" I hissed as that selfish thought crossed my mind. This was the monster inside of me…the monster that each and every one of us fought back every moment of our immortal life. But even as I denied the thought, my mind drifted as if trying to convince me otherwise. _Why couldn't I give in? Why couldn't I offer this to Ben?_ Bella had chosen this life – had been fulfilled by it_. Wasn't it possible that it would be best for everyone if Ben had the same opportunity?We could be together, forever…and I would no longer be alone._

_Memories flooded my thoughts as I recalled the happiness of Bella and Edward's wedding day. They had waited patiently through my newborn stage, Bella wanting me to be able to stand at her side as they began their lives together. The radiant smile on her face as she walked down the aisle on Carlisle's arm and joined hands with Edward was proof enough that everything she had gone through, every moment she had suffered was worth it. _

_Although our wedding planner extraordinaire had magically created the wedding any girl would want, I knew in my heart that all that mattered to Edward and Bella at that moment was that they were pledging their hearts to each other forever._

_The emotions that poured over me as they recited their vows were intense and pure. I was thrilled for them, knowing that although they had been committed to each other from almost day one, this official union was a symbol that they both would cherish for an eternity. But as happy as I had been, a small part of me died that day knowing I would never find that moment. _

_I regretted the feeling, knowing without a doubt that Jasper had felt it as well. Looking up, I met his questioning gaze as he stood at Edward's side and appreciated the understanding that I saw there. What I welcomed even more was the burst of joy that he sent out to the entire family, pulling us into exactly what Edward and Bella were feeling at that moment. I drew that emotion in, wanting to bask in their joy and give them the day they deserved. The last thing I wanted was for Edward to hear unhappy thoughts. It had taken so long for us to become friends and the last thing I wanted him to feel from me on his wedding day was sadness or regret. I was convinced that he had suffered enough from my thoughts; surely I could get over myself this one day and allow him the joy he deserved._

* * *

**(Edward's POV)**

I stood on the landing, frozen while I allowed Angela's thoughts to consume me. Memories of the happiest moment in my existence flowed through my mind as I watched my Bella walk towards me, her arm linked securely with my father's. She was simply breathtaking as she floated towards me – an angel in white. My angel – she truly was because she had saved me from an eternity of darkness and I would forever be thankful.

The vows we spoke that day were mere reflections of the promises we had already made to each other the very moment she had forgiven me and allowed me back in her life completely. However, to share them with our family and if it were possible, God, meant more than I could have imagined.

But even that day held its own bit of sadness. Although, I could not read my beloved's thoughts, I had known that as joyful as she was there was a small part of her that mourned the fact that her father was not there to walk her down the aisle. She was not alone in this regret, as I too wished that my own parents were there to see us marry. As much as I loved Carlisle and Esme, this was one moment when my own parents could not be replaced.

Selfishly though, I had never considered the thoughts and feelings of any of the other members of the family as we stood in the candlelit hall of our home in Scotland and pledged our love to each other.

And now to learn the feelings that Angela had tucked away that day so as not to ruin our day, I was once again overwhelmed by her generosity and forgiveness, yet tormented with regret at the same time. So often since that fateful day I had questioned the choice I made and now as I learned yet again of the pain I had caused Angela, I found myself at those crossroads once more.

"You did the right thing."

The unspoken thought startled me out of my trance and I stared at Jasper sullenly for a moment before following him out the door and away from Angela's thoughts.

Dropping onto the ground at the far edge of the garden, Jasper sat leaning against one of the stones that lined Esme's floral masterpiece. I stood silently, my arms crossed as I waited for him to speak. His mind had been noticeably occupied by a list of confederate war generals and I huffed my frustration as he smirked in response.

"Drives you mad, doesn't it?" he drawled, chuckling at my aggravation. "Imagine how frustrating it is to those who don't have a gift, yet know their every thought is like an open book for you to read?"

"I know, Jasper! I wasn't trying to invade her privacy, but it's pretty hard to ignore the billboards presented in my mind – especially when they are of my wife!" I dropped to the ground beside him. "I was on my way up to speak to her and try to dissuade her from listening to your ridiculous ideas when I was overcome with memories of my wedding day."

"I will choose to ignore your obvious glaring lack of judgement towards said 'ridiculous ideas' as I hear a 'but' hanging in the air." Jasper raised his eyebrow and stared me down. "What else did you read, dear brother?"

Remorse wormed its way back into my heart as I thought of Angela. "She thinks she will never be completely fulfilled. She believes that she will never find love again." I felt the regret slip away and silently thanked Jasper for its removal.

"So now you understand my ridiculous ideas?"

I stared at him in stony silence, not yet ready to admit he was right. "Do you really believe that Ben is that person, Jasper? You honestly think that a school girl crush was more than that?"

"No, Edward. I am not sure that it was more than that. However, Angela has never known love other than that teenage romance. Perhaps it was nothing more than that, but she obviously is not the only one still caught up in it. You heard what Jacob said to her. You know how Ben reacted to seeing her. Isn't there a possibility that there's more to it than a 'school girl crush'?"

"Aw Jazz, when did you become such a romantic?" We both turned to find Bella and Alice approaching us from the house.

Pulling Alice into his lap, he grinned menacingly at Bella. "Darlin', you have no idea how romantic a true Southerner can be."

Chuckling in response, Bella sat beside me, her hand instantly finding mine. "Well Jazz, I'll take your word for it...my Chicago boy here does fine." She pressed her lips to mine and I grinned at her response. "So what are you boys talking so seriously about out here?"

"Well, Eddie-boy here was just about to tell me how wrong he was…" he laughed into Alice's shoulder as I reached over and punched him in the arm.

"I wouldn't say I was wrong, but I do see where you were coming from." I tightened my grip on Bella's hand and she smiled at me tenderly. "However, it doesn't make approaching Ben any less dangerous – one mistake and it could be all over for him and how do you think she would deal with that?"

"I think you need to give Ang a little more credit, Edward."

I looked at Alice defiantly. "Why Alice? Just because your visions tell you so? You know that things can change in a heartbeat or have you not learned that lesson yet?"

"Enough, Edward!" I was stunned as Bella turned on me, her eyes blazing in fury. "You have got to stop blaming Alice for everything that has happened! I do not regret my life with you. Yes, I lost. I lost a lot…many of us did, but don't you see that it can't be blamed on one single act?"

Bella stood and began to pace, her frustration evident. "Charlie could have been shot in the line of duty. I could've died in a car crash. Angela could have drowned. The one thing that a human can count on…the one thing they know without a doubt is that their life can be over in an instant!"

"I know Bella, but..."

"Oh I know you know, but why won't you accept it?" I stared at her, at a loss for words. "We were dealt this hand and there's nothing that can change it. Yes, Alice has visions and can see what is possibly to come, but some things are just meant to be. You and I were MEANT to be…or do you not believe that?"

"Of course I believe that." Once again she cut me off.

"Well, if you can accept that so easily, why can't you believe that Angela was meant to live this life? Why can't you accept that perhaps Ben is meant to as well?"

"Why should anyone get to decide that other than Ben?" We all turned to find Angela standing behind us, her hands firmly planted on her hips as she stared at us indignantly. "I know you all mean well and I love you dearly, but this is the exact reason I went to Scotland."

"Ang, I…"

"Edward, please! Don't for one instant think that you can convince me otherwise. I need you guys to trust me. I need you to let me make my own decisions, my own choices. I value your opinions, but it would be nice to be able to ask for them rather than have them offered to me constantly."

"So does this mean you're going to see him?" Alice was nearly bouncing with excitement.

"Like you don't already know the answer to that question, Ali," Angela rolled her eyes, "but I would appreciate it if you would all just back off and let me handle this my way." She turned back towards the house. "Alice, I **DO NOT **want to know!" Without another word, she disappeared into the night.

I smirked against Bella's shoulder, Alice's disappointment evident.

"You think it's funny, do you? Seems to me I wasn't the only one she was angry with," Alice fumed. "Don't even think about trying to see what happens!"

My mind was immediately submerged in explicit visuals of Jasper and Alice and my embarrassment was obvious. They were still laughing as the two of them disappeared into the forest, leaving me with my angry wife.

"I don't suppose you have forgiven me yet?" I asked as I pulled her to me, the most sheepish expression I could muster plastered on my face.

Sighing, she ran her fingers through my hair, pulling me down until I was at her eye level and pressing her forehead against mine. "I could be persuaded to forgive you, but only if you promise me that you will try and let this…" she paused, searching, "masochistic guilt go."

"I'll try." It was the only honest answer I could give her. As I pressed my lips to hers, anchoring myself to my shelter in the storm, I attempted to live up to that promise and ignore the clouds that were all but rolling in.

* * *

_**End of chapter – reviews are like candy and I LOVE candy!**_


	15. Two Out of Three Ain't Bad

__

__

_**A/N – Well here we are again! Hope everyone had a lovely week! The last chapter had more hits and reviews and I am glad to see that it is gaining a bit of interest! **_

_**Many thanks as always to my wonderful beta and friend, changedbyEdward – you are my rock, bb! MWAH! Oh and you can blame the lyrics all on me this time – LOL!**_

_**You know the usual…Steph owns it and I wish I did! No copyright infringement intended.**_

__

___

* * *

_

_I can't lie  
I can't tell you that I'm something I'm not  
No matter how I try  
I'll never be able  
To give you something  
Something that I just haven't got  
There's only one girl that I will ever love  
And that was so many years ago  
And though I know I'll never get her out of my heart  
She never loved me back  
Ooh I know  
I remember how she left me on a stormy night  
She kissed me and got out of our bed  
And though I pleaded and I begged her not to walk out that door  
She packed her bags and turned right away  
And she kept on telling me  
She kept on telling me  
She kept on telling me  
I want you (I want you)  
I need you (I need you)  
But there ain't no way I'm ever gonna love you  
Now don't be sad (Don't be sad)  
'Cause two out of three ain't bad  
I want you (I want you)  
I need you (I need you)  
But there ain't no way I'm ever gonna love you  
Now don't be sad (Don't be sad)  
'Cause two out of three ain't bad  
Now don't be sad (Don't)  
'Cause two out of three ain't bad  
Baby we can talk all night  
But that ain't getting us nowhere_

- Meatloaf –

* * *

_**(Purposely leaving out who's POV - you will figure it out!)**_

It was now or never. I had to tell him how I felt. From the first moment I saw him again, I knew that the emotions raging through me were too strong to ignore.

I sensed his loneliness; his despair. So many tragedies in such a short time were a heavy cross to bear, especially for someone as kind-hearted as Ben. But could he feel the same way for someone like me? Did he even see me like that at all?

I understood much of what he was going through, even though the circumstances weren't exactly alike. Suffering the loss of a parent, no matter what the situation was something a person never got over. The one you looked to for shelter, for guidance, for unconditional love snatched away in an instant.

I also knew the heartache of having your soul ripped in two. Although I hadn't lost my partner the same way – he was as dead to me as Angela was to Ben. The moment that Sam betrayed me with Emily was the moment I thought I would never love again.

"Imprinting." How I loathed the word. Even now, after learning everything with my own agonizing introduction to the life of a werewolf, it was a bitter pill for me to swallow. I know that Sam had no choice – that he regrets every ounce of pain I have endured from the situation. I hear it in his thoughts every moment we are in wolf form. But I still resent them. I despise having to witness their public displays of affection; their bliss.

I longed to disappear from this place. Leave them all behind and start a new life – carve out a new identity for myself where there were no monsters, no imprinting, no Sam and Emily. But I was stuck here, forced to endure it all – which made things even worse. At least it had until he walked back into our lives.

I remember the sad teenage boy that combed the woods day after day for his lost love. The shadows that fell over Forks, Washington that spring were still hard to look back on. So many precious lives snuffed out by vicious monsters – the same monsters that had stolen my normalcy from me. Had stolen everything from me.

It made me sick to think that Jacob could associate with their kind. He had been so accepting of what his 'beloved' Bella had become. To know that he still fantasized of a life with her, even now was incomprehensible to me. I wanted to avoid him; his thoughts, but didn't for fear I would miss an opportunity to spend time with Ben.

Of course Jacob knew of my feelings for him, the whole pack did. It was impossible to hide anything from them and the only solace I took out of it was that at least Sam saw that I had moved on. I was no longer 'pining' over what could never be. I liked to believe that he was even a little jealous of the fact that I had found someone else to love.

But for me to do that, I needed to let Ben know how I felt. We were friends and I knew he was comfortable with me and accepted that I was not normal, but it was time to know if he could feel more. If he could care for me in the same way that I did for him.

We had both suffered, we had both lost – wasn't it time for us to have a chance at happiness?

Tonight was the night for me to finally open up. To finally take the chance on love again and ask him to let me in. Convinced that fate was finally giving me a break, I took one last glance in the mirror and headed out into the night.

* * *

_____**(Ben's POV)**_

Pulling the door open, I fought back the disappointment. "Leah."

"Hey." She smiled up at me and I tried to return the gesture, even though inside my heart was shattering. "Haven't seen you in a bit so thought I would stop by and say hello." Holding up a bottle of Jack Daniels, she grinned again. "Want some company?"

Not wanting to hurt her feelings, I stepped back and opened the door. "Come on in."

She strode past me and I glanced quickly around the yard, hoping for the best, but knowing that it was nothing more than a dream. For all I knew she was already gone. Suddenly the honey brown liquid that Leah was already pouring was much more appealing. I didn't want to think anymore.

Accepting the glass, I took a sip and dropped onto the couch. "Thanks Leah. I appreciate the company and the beverage." She smiled again as I clinked her glass and took another sip of the amber liquid. The soothing burn as it slid down my throat was enough to make me sigh. Leaning my head back against the couch, we sat in comfortable silence staring into the fire.

It wasn't the first time Leah had sought out my company and I appreciated her friendship. Deep down she was a sweet girl and I often wondered why she and Jacob didn't try and make a go of it. She tried to be tough around the rest of the pack and I knew there was a bit of a history between her and Sam, but surely that wouldn't be something that would hold Jake back.

Although in some ways I knew that Jake was just as broken as I was. He had never really gotten over Bella's suicide – hell he even talked about her sometimes like she still existed. A sickening chill came over me as I re-played that thought in my head. _What if she really did exist? How much had Jake really been keeping from me? He was my best friend. He wouldn't do something like that – would he?_

"Penny for your thoughts?" Leah's voice called me out of my dark thoughts and I opened my eyes to see her standing in front of me, a re-filled glass in her hand.

Shaking my head, I grinned at her and took the drink from her hands. "Nothing important. If I didn't know any better, Leah, I'd almost think you were trying to get me wasted."

She smiled mischievously and sat down beside me, tucking her legs beneath her. "And would that be such a bad thing, Ben?" She took another sip of her drink before setting it down on the table. Kneeling on the couch facing me, she reached up and brushed the hair away from my forehead. "Call it liquid courage."

Before I had a chance to process what was happening, I felt her mouth on mine, gentle at first but growing more aggressive with each passing moment. Moaning, she fisted her hands in my hair, and bit at my bottom lip, her tongue begging for entrance. She was intoxicating, the taste of her mixed with the whiskey a temptation I was finding difficult to ignore. "Please, Ben…" she whispered and broke the spell she had almost cast.

Bringing my hands to her shoulders, I gently pushed her away. "Leah, no." The look of rejection that crossed her face pained me and I let my hands drop to hers. "I can't."

We sat in silence and I knew she was contemplating what to say next. I watched her, hoping she would understand. There was no denying that she was beautiful; exotic in her own way. But it was impossible for me to even think of being with her in that manner. She was a good friend and didn't deserve a one night stand where I would be pretending that she was someone else; pretending that her dark eyes were golden butterscotch. Eyes that would haunt me for the rest of my days.

I sighed deeply, closing my eyes as a lone tear slid down my cheek. Warm hands cupped my face and I opened them swiftly, Leah's sympathetic understanding obvious. It terrified me that she could read me so easily, but what scared me even more were the obvious emotions that she was trying desperately to control. I didn't want to hurt her. I didn't want to make promises I would never be able to keep. She deserved more than that.

"Ben, I care about you. I know you're hurting. Let me take the hurt away, even if it's only for a little while." Her lips once again sought mine and this time I didn't pull away. Slipping my hands into her hair, I let every thought go, if only for a moment.

Silence fell…only broken by our thudding hearts as we lost ourselves in that kiss. Pulling her into my lap I pushed back any thoughts of Angela and trailed my tongue along her jaw, smiling at her gentle moan. But even as I buried my face against her neck, my mouth caressing her scorching skin, I knew it was wrong. Wrestling with every fibre in my being, I held her close, urging the guilt away. I needed this. I needed to feel…something. It was selfish and I was a fool.

"Ben..." My name slipped from her lips in a soft moan again as her willowy frame writhed against me; her desire becoming my sole focus. She pulled back from me suddenly, her eyes darkening in anger as she shoved me off the couch and onto the floor.

"What is it? What's wrong?" I was stunned. Her body seemed to be trembling as she stalked away from me.

"Vampire," she hissed.

_Vampire?_

"Leah, no!" I shouted as I ran towards the door that suddenly disintegrated in front of me. She was here. "Angela!" I stared in wonder at the glorious angel that stood before me, her anger radiating from her as she glared in disdain at my companion.

"Get away from him, you filthy mongrel!" Angela spat and I turned to face Leah, surprised to find she had shifted. Bewildered, I watched the silver wolf in front of me snarl; her fangs glistening, her fur bristling.

I moved as if to approach Angela, but stopped when I heard another menacing growl. "Leah, please, you can't…I'm begging you. I..." My words were cut off as my body flew in the air, slamming into the stones of the fireplace. Blackness swirled around me as I fought to stay conscious, hearing my name cried out before a rush of bodies crashing and teeth snapping.

Blinking, I tried to focus, but knew it was a losing battle as nausea swept over me. The room was eerily silent and I turned my head slowly, but again the darkness overcame me. Distant voices called out to me, yet I could not answer. I lifted my arm as if trying to grasp on to something, anything that could pull me out of the fog and hissed at the amount of blood that dripped from my hand. It was the last thing I remember seeing before slipping away into the unknown.

"It will be all right, Ben, I promise." The words were a whisper on the air and I tried to open my eyes; the voice hauntingly familiar. Cool hands moved over my frame, reminding me of Angela's touch. I reached out for her, but found nothing. She was gone.

I felt as if I were floating on a cloud, the darkness around me shifting as I moved. Soft incoherent murmurs filled the air and the lightest of touches feathered against my skin only to be replaced by a pain I never believed possible.

Overcome with agony, a constricting pressure built around my chest cavity. It was as though my entire body were in a giant vice grip that was tightening to the point of combustion. Searing lava washed over my insides and I thrashed against the invisible restraints that bound me. Torturous screams assaulted my ears and I prayed for silence, only to discover that the shrieking was coming from me.

On and on the fires raged within. I begged for mercy. I plead for forgiveness. My requests fell on deaf ears and I continued to burn. _Am I in hell? What ever did I do to deserve such punishment?_

Convinced that I had been left to suffer alone, my cries faded to soft moans and I prayed for death to take me so I would feel no more. I fought to hold onto my sanity, grasping at any memories I could find of happier times. Snapshots of my life drifted in and out of my subconscious and I struggled against the burn to place names to the faces that floated before me.

A final jolt of electricity flamed through my body and I gasped as the intense pain brought with it almost instant relief. A tingling sensation overtook my body and I rejoiced that I was finally at peace. I burned no more.

* * *

_**End of Chapter – it's my birthday – so today, reviews are like gifts!**_


	16. It Should Happen This Way

_**A/N – And here we are again! I loved all the feedback (and the birthday wishes – MWAH) and think I may have thrown a few of you for a loop, hehehe! All I am going to say is, buckle up…things are about to get interesting!**_

_**Smooches to changedbyEdward, my darling beta, for getting this back to me so quickly and to the lovely Lazykate for the perfect lyrics! **_

_**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight universe. No copyright infringement intended!**_

* * *

_It makes sense that it should happen this way.__  
__That the sky should break,__  
__And the earth should shake.__  
__As if to say, "Sure it all matters, but in such an unimportant way."__  
__As if to say, "Fly away,__  
__Sweet bird of prey,__  
__Fly, fly away.__  
__Nothing can stand in your way, sweet bird,__  
__If you knew the words I know you'd say,__  
__Fly, fly away."__It makes sense that it should hurt in this way.__  
__That my heart should break,__  
__And my hands should shake.__  
__As if to say, "Sure, it don't matter, except in the most important way."__  
__As if to say, "Fly away, sweet bird of prey,__  
__Fly, fly away.__  
__I won't stand in your way, sweet bird,__  
__If you knew the words,__  
__I know that you'd say, fly away."__It makes sense that it should feel this way.__  
__That you slowly fade, yet still remain.__  
__As if to say, "Everything matters in such an invisible way."__  
__As if to say, "It's okay,__  
__Fly away."_

* * *

_**(Jacob's POV)**_

I drove towards Ben's already knowing that the trip was pointless. Leah was going to be pissed because I was interrupting the evening she had planned, but this couldn't wait. I had to try and get through to him…make him realize that he could not risk his life chasing after a fantasy. Fantasy…Ha! More like a nightmare in my book!

There was no way this was going to go well. I would likely lose his friendship for good before the night was over, but it was a chance I was willing to take. I couldn't let him spend the rest of his days wanting impossibility. Hell, I was already doomed to that existence, I couldn't very well let him make the same mistake.

I was already on edge as the gravel crunched against my tires. Pulling into the long driveway, I spotted Leah's jeep pulled up to the garage. I had to give the girl credit, she decided what she wanted and went after it. It was more than I could say for myself, although I had lost Bella before I even had a chance to go after her.

Unfortunately, I knew that the only person who was going to be hurt was Leah. Ben's heart belonged to someone else and had for a long, long time. Maybe if I could talk some sense into his thick brain, she might stand a chance down the road – but right now she was fighting a losing battle. He was in love with a memory.

Noticing the door wide open, I threw the truck into park and slipped out hurriedly. My initial concern amplified immediately when I realized that the door wasn't just open – it was off its hinges. Fearing the worst, I took the stairs two at a time – my throat constricting at the sickening saccharine stench that permeated the air.

The room was a shambles, broken furniture and glass strewn everywhere. At first glance it appeared abandoned and I turned to resume my search outside, but my heart lurched when I caught the scent of fresh blood. Spinning quickly I ran back into the living room and stopped cold.

"Ben!" I dropped to his side and searched for a pulse, terrified I would find none. Staring at his ashen face, I was relieved to find it, faint but still beating. Bile scorched my throat and I trembled, hatred surging through me. She would pay for this. I fought the automatic instinct to shift, knowing I needed to take inventory of his injuries and find out where all the blood was coming from.

Then it hit me. There was blood. Why hadn't the leech drained him? Sucker-punched, I stared at the open wounds on his chest, his shirt shredded as if ripped by talons. _Leah, what have you done?_

Ben's struggling breaths pulled me out of my stupor and I knew I needed to act swiftly. There was no way I could get him to the hospital in time, never mind how I would explain his injuries. I stared down at my friend, struggling in indecision before pulling out my phone with shaking hands.

"Jake?" Bella's voice chimed immediately.

"Bells. You have to come. I need you to come to Ben's right away!"

"Jake, what is it? What's wrong?"

"Please Bella! I can't explain, but come alone. Please just do as I ask!"

Dropping the phone I slid to the floor beside Ben, pressing against the worst of the wounds. I couldn't lose him…no matter what the cost.

* * *

_**(Bella's POV)**_

The argument with Edward had been ugly and I hated leaving things as I did, but the fear in Jake's voice convinced me I had no choice. I tore off through the trees knowing that the rest of the family would follow shortly, but hold back unless they sensed danger.

Branches slapped against my marble skin as I flew through the thick brush towards Ben's house. Inhaling deeply I was hit with the reek of wet dog and my senses were immediately on alert. It wasn't Jake.

I continued my flight through the treetops, knowing I would at least have a chance to get away if needed. I needed to get to Jake quickly; Edward's reaction to the stench would not go well.

All reason scattered from my mind as a red haze pooled in my vision. Venom coursed into my mouth and a raw thirst burned in my throat. Blood. Human blood.

I fought against the monster inside as it roared to life. Intoxicated by the sweet elixir, it begged for release. With my last coherent thought, I grabbed onto the trunk of a large spruce and buried my face against the tree, holding my breath as I did so.

I held on, urging the monster back into its cage. It had been years since I had slipped – the memory of the old Indian tracker etched forever in my memory. I would not take a human life again.

My thoughts coherent once more, I slid from the branches and made my way towards the house, spotting Jake's truck and another vehicle in the driveway.

My silent approach turned to a run as I heard the most heart-wrenching sobs coming from the house…coming from Jake.

"Jacob!" My eyes met his as I took in the gruesome horror in front of me. I swallowed the venom back as I took in the scene before me. I realized at once that he was cradling a critically injured man in his arms…Ben. His heartbeat was so faint that it was almost non-existent and it didn't take a genius to know that he had lost far too much blood.

The monster rattled its chains again and I grabbed onto the door frame, the wood crumbling in my hands. Jake stared at me in fascinated horror. He knew I was battling the demon within.

"Bella, please Bella. You have to save him."

I stared at him, appalled. He couldn't actually be asking me to do this.

"Bells. Please! Whatever it takes."

I stepped backwards, shaking my head furiously. "Jake, I can't. I can't do this. Please don't ask me to do this."

Glaring at me, he was in front of me in an instant. "Can't or won't?"

"Jacob. You don't know what you're asking! I have no idea what to do. If I could stop. Let me call Edward…"

"No!" My cell phone was smashed out of my hands and I fought the urge to snap him in two.

Seeing my anger, he stepped back – his hands raised in surrender. "I'm sorry, Bells. I really am, but you're his only chance! He won't make it if we don't do something right now!"

"Jake, if I do this…what if I can't stop? I'll kill him."

"Don't you see, Bella? He's already gone. There's no saving his human life. If you won't do it for me…do it for Angela."

Visions of my sister flashed before me and I stared at the mangled body that lay on the floor dying. I didn't want to see her lose again. She had already suffered so much. Resigned, I looked up into the face of my childhood friend.

"I'll try." I moved towards Ben, terrified. "You need to leave, Jake. I can't do this with you in here. Go and find Carlisle and Edward – they should be in the far tree line and I need them to come right away."

Afraid that I would change my mind, I focussed on the task before me when Jake left the house. I knew I couldn't take another breath for fear of the bloodlust taking over. Chanting Angela's name in my mind, I moved towards Ben and lifted him as gently as I could in my arms.

I carried him up the stairs and entered the first bedroom I found, placing him in the center of the bed. My hands moved over his ashen frame, noting the injuries so I could report them to Carlisle. My eyes dropped to my wrist and I took in the faint scar that rested there. I could do this. Lowering my face to Ben's, I whispered softly in his ear. "It will be all right, Ben. I promise."

Praying I was right, I raised his left wrist to my mouth and bit. Again the monster roared to life as the sweet nectar slid down my throat but I resisted, my Angela chant coursing through my brain. I continued my task, sealing each wound with my venom as I tore into his delicate skin.

Shaking, I pulled away from him and moved across the room as his screams began. I pressed my back against the wall, feeling the plaster crack and crumble behind me as I held my head in my hands and rocked.

Arms wrapped around my torso and I sobbed against Edward's chest as he cradled me against him, his lips pressed to my forehead. "Shh, Bella. It will be all right."

"Where's Jake?" I whispered, unable to open my eyes and face the room.

Edward's silence terrified me and I looked up into his eyes, the worry obvious.

"Edward? Where's Jake?"

"He and the pack are out looking for Leah."

"Leah? Why Leah? Did she do this?"

Edward nodded and a wave of terror washed over me. Angela had been on her way over here. If she found Leah here…gasping, my eyes moved over to the bed, where Ben lay prone screaming in agony. Carlisle and Esme sat with him, murmuring to each other quietly. _What had I done? What if I had turned Ben, only to have Angela lost?_

"It will be okay, love." I longed to believe Edward's words, but I feared the worst.

I grimaced as Ben convulsed, Carlisle catching him before he hit the floor and returning him to the center of the bed. "How is he?"

Carlisle turned towards me, his eyes gentle. "He will be fine, Bella. I am so proud of you."

"How can you be proud of me, Carlisle? I've taken a life…again!" I moved to flee the room, but Edward pulled me closer into his arms and pressed his lips against my hair.

Carlisle approached, his hand gently reaching for mine. "You did as your friend asked of you. Do you not believe that Angela would have saved him if she could have? Bella, he would never have survived those injuries." Squeezing my hand, he moved back to sit with Esme.

"We'll need to move him from here before he wakes up." We turned to find Jasper in the doorway.

Carlisle nodded in agreement. "Anything?"

Jasper shook his head. "Nothing. They have covered a great distance in a short amount of time and the pack has compromised the trail with their stench." He grimaced.

"What about Alice? Has she seen anything?" I had to ask even though I knew from the look on Edward's face that the news was anything but good.

"At first she saw nothing. Now she is getting flashes, but because Leah is so close to her – she can't get a true read. Too many holes." Jasper was tense and I knew how stressed he was regarding the entire situation. He was worried about Angela and worrying about Ben and what my biting him meant as far as our treaty with the Quileutes was concerned, not to mention the stress Alice would be in over not having been able to foretell this whole mess.

As Ben's screams quieted to moans, Carlisle and Esme moved quickly, readying him for a move to our home that was at least further out of town and away from the general public. We wouldn't be able to stay there long, knowing Ben would be a frenzied newborn once he came through the burn.

I remembered all too well those first few months of bloodlust.

Moving quickly, we left the house and split in two groups. Carlisle, Esme and Jasper headed towards home with Ben while Edward and I remained within sight of the house in the off-chance that either Leah or Angela returned.

I felt helpless and knew that Edward felt the same. It was absolutely terrifying not knowing what was going on. We had no idea what Angela had seen, what had caused Leah to turn on Ben as she had. We didn't know anything…and all we could do was wait and hope for some answers.

* * *

_**End of Chapter – so anyone wanna take a stab at what Angela's reaction will be?**_


	17. Darkness Falls

**_A/N – I'm sorry! So, so sorry! I know it has been a long time since the last chap, but to be honest the last two came so easily that I ended up paying for this one! I am still not sure I am completely happy where this went, but it is leading in the right direction – so rather than make you all wait any longer…_**

**_Hugs and lots of love to my beta, changedbyEdward for turning this one out so quickly after I took so long with it! _**

**_You know the drill…Steph owns it….I am borrowing and there is no copyright infringement intended!_**

**_Previously in CWYWF… Jake finds Ben near death and asks Bella to save him – no matter what it takes. Bella struggles to stay in control as she turns Ben – praying it would be the choice that Angela would make. The Cullens worry knowing that Angela and Leah are on the run, but no one knows who is giving chase…_**

* * *

_See, what a scourge is laid upon your hate,__  
__That heaven finds means to kill your joys with love.__  
__And I for winking at your discords too__  
__Have lost a brace of kinsmen: all are punish'd._

_A glooming peace this morning with it brings;__  
__The sun, for sorrow, will not show his head:__  
__Go hence, to have more talk of these sad things;__  
__Some shall be pardon'd, and some punished:__  
__For never was a story of more woe__  
__Than this of Juliet and her Romeo._

_- William Shakespeare -_

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

Thirst.

Scorching thirst, deadly desire.

I did the only thing I could. I ran.

I didn't allow myself to think. I simply reacted, tearing out of the house and running for the forest. Away from the blood, away from him.

My worst nightmare had come true. I feared the danger I would put Ben in by seeing him again, still I had gone to him, ignoring the risk.

I went and now Ben would pay the consequences. I had no idea whether he was alive or dead when I took off; I couldn't take the chance and remain to find out. It wasn't for fear of the stinking dog that now appeared to be hot on my trail, she was the least of my worries.

It was the realization that I couldn't go to him, tend to him for fear of draining him of what little life source remained. _How can I even consider a life with him when the first thought that came to my mind when he was injured was how delicious his blood smelled? _

So I ran. Fled through the forest as quickly as I could – foliage and landscape nothing more than a blur as I put as much distance possible between the monster in me and my desire.

I travelled this way for hours, running through water when I happened upon it to deter my scent and hopefully throw off the hunter following me. I would eventually face her, but not until it was on my terms.

I knew that I should have got on that plane. If I had just left then none of this would be happening. Ben would be safe. He wouldn't be laying in his house bleeding to death.

_No, instead he would be kissing that mutt!_ The memory of their tryst shoved its way into my mind and I felt my anger rise along with a growl deep in my chest. _How dare she touch him! He is mine!_

But wasn't that what I wanted for Ben? Did I not want him to forget about what we might have had and find love? I knew that would have been what Angela Weber would have wanted. She would have been willing to step aside for the greater good. She would have sacrificed her own happiness for the one that she loved.

But I wasn't that girl. I hadn't been that girl in a very long time. I wanted him. I wanted him more than anything I had ever desired in life. So why hadn't I acted sooner? Why hadn't I simply given into my desires in that cemetery the moment I saw him? And now it was too late.

In my haste to see Ben, I had left my cell phone behind at the house, and now I wished for it. Yet I wondered if I would actually use it if I had it with me or if I would be too afraid to face the music. Perhaps it was better not knowing what had come of the situation.

In my heart I knew he was already gone. I had seen the damage the wolf had done with one careless swipe of her paw and the force with which he hit the stone fireplace as she knocked him out of the way. She had been trying to protect him from me and killed him in doing so. For that, I wanted her dead. Vengeance would be mine.

I let the anger take me over; allowed the red haze to blur my vision. I pushed back visions of my family, of Carlisle and Esme. I knew that making the choice to hunt and kill the monster that had taken Ben from me was going against everything they believed in.

There would be no turning back. Hunting that mongrel would be the end. I could take comfort in the fact that I wouldn't be without a family for long as the rest of the wolves would make short work of a lone vampire – especially one who had killed one of their pack. Perhaps then I would find peace. It was time to hunt.

* * *

_**(Leah's POV)**_

_What have I done?_

That question seemed to be a repetitive score to the horror film in my mind. Images of monsters and blood…so much blood, along with the haunting crack of bones breaking made my stomach churn with anxiety. Although my skin was its steady 108 degrees, I felt chilled as I sat high on a cliff staring off into the vast unknown.

I had shifted back to my human form hours before, unable to stand the shouting in my head as the rest of the pack formed and searched for me. I was surprised that Sam had not ordered me back, even though I would have fought against the command with every inch of my being if he had done so. There was no way I could go back, not now. How could I face Jacob, knowing what I had done? How could I face Sam…and Emily, after all the warnings they had given? Emily's scars were a constant reminder to the pack of how dangerous we could be and in a single moment I had made the same mistake, most likely a deadly one. _God Ben, what have I done?_

For one solitary moment, everything seemed to be falling into place. It hadn't been the perfect romantic evening I had hoped for, but I believe that it might have been the beginning of something for us. I understood his initial hesitation but when we kissed the second time – I know it wasn't just me. He was kissing me back. He was giving us a chance. I honestly believe that was all we may have needed.

I should have known it wouldn't happen though. I should have realized that like every other precious thing in my life, this would be destroyed as well. Murdered before it even had a chance to blossom. That is all that filthy bloodsuckers seem to be good for. Draining everything of life.

My skin prickled as I fought back the anger and the urge to shift with it. I needed time to plan my next move and I could not do it with the rest of the pack crowding my mind.

I longed to be able to place the blame all on the vampire, but I knew that I couldn't. Ben had tried to stop me as soon as I began to shift. It was almost as if he had been waiting for her to come. As if he had been expecting her. My stomach heaved as the puzzle pieces slid into place. It was Angela.

Tears stung behind my lids as I re-played the scenario again in my mind. He had been trying to protect her…from me. It all made sense now. Once again I was taking second place, this time to a fucking vampire.

I knew before I even finished the thought that I was wrong again. I wasn't placing second. I hadn't even stood a chance in the race. Ben had loved that 'girl' – it sickened me to call her that – since I had known him. He had never really let go. That was why he had been so surprised by my advances; he had never even considered the possibility of being with another woman because his heart belonged to her.

But he couldn't be with her. I'm sure he realized that she was no longer human. _It didn't matter. _I choked back the bile and pressed my fists against the ground, once again fighting the urge to shift. The thought that he would choose that 'existence' was inconceivable, yet I knew that I was right.

The thought of Ben being one of them was almost too painful to bear and for a moment I was almost glad I had most likely destroyed that possibility. The thought was fleeting, though, as I was overwhelmed with the realization that either way the man I was loved was dead to me. Tears streamed silently down my face and I hugged my legs close to my body, wishing for relief from the pain.

"Leah!"

I froze, stunned that I had been found. I should have known that if anyone would find me it would be him. "Sam, go away."

"You know I can't, Lee-lee." I cringed.

"Don't you call me that! You lost that right a long time ago, Sam!" I flew off the rock, my body trembling in anger. I watched his face contort, hurt and anger only two of the many emotions he fought to control.

"I'm sorry, Leah. Please, hear me out." He raised his hands in surrender and I hesitated, not for his sake but wanting to know Ben's fate. Accepting my silent stare as a positive reaction, he sat on the log facing me. "Leah, you need to come back with me."

"How is he?" The words came out in a choked whisper and I clenched my eyes tightly closed to keep the tears at bay.

"Leah, it was a mistake. You didn't mean to do it."

"Answer my question, Sam!"

"He's gone." I felt my knees give out beneath me and prayed the ground was swallowing me whole. I had killed him.

"Oh my God, what have I done?" The words rushed out of me as my body rocked against the earth. Sam watched me in silence, knowing that the last thing I would want was his comfort. Pulling myself together, I faced him. "Why on earth would you want me to go back? I can't go back, Sam! How do I face Jacob? How do I face anyone?"

"You can't stay here, Leah. It isn't safe."

"She's hunting me, isn't she? I killed her mate!" I stared him straight in the eye. "Let her come, Sam! I deserve it. And maybe I can take her down with me!"

"Don't be stupid!" Sam thundered. "You know I won't allow you to stay out here on your own – to face one of them on your own!"

"You won't allow me?" I shrieked back. "**YOU** won't allow **ME**?" I paced before him. "You have no say in what I do, Sam Uley! And I swear if you try and force me, you will regret it! Let me go, Sam!"

My last words were lost as my body exploded and I tore into the woods. I waited for his command and was surprised and relieved when it did not come. The rest of the pack called to me, but I shut out their voices, concentrating solely on the ground beneath my feet as I put miles between us.

An eerie silence fell over the woods as I made my way over the rough terrain. I welcomed the solitude, wondering why exactly it had become that way. I moved quickly through the trees, unsure of where I was, but knowing from the dense tundra that I was far from civilization.

Slowing slightly I allowed myself to finally think. I hoped that Sam was right and that the bloodsucker was after me. It was what I wanted. But I hadn't been honest when I said I would take her with me. We would fight and I would lose. She would end my pain and live with hers for all eternity – I couldn't think of a better ending to such a sad tale.

* * *

_**End of chapter - your thoughts? Please? Pretty Please? LOL**_


	18. Remember Me

_**A/N – OK so not so long between chaps this time! There may be a bit of a delay next week as my beloved beta is taking a MUCH needed vacation! She won't be gone long but just wanted y'all to know I wasn't disappearing again – trust me….you do not want me to post without ChangedbyEdward working her magic first!**_

_**Thanks again for all the wonderful reviews…I know I am absolute fail at responding, but I do read each and every one and love the ideas some of you come up with! **_

_**Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight universe….I am simply playing in it! No copyright infringement intended.**_

_**Previously in CWYWF – A visit into both Angela and Leah's minds – as they both come to terms with what has most likely happened to Ben and how they proceed…**_

* * *

_Then the mountain rose before me  
By the deep well of desire  
From the fountain of forgiveness  
Beyond the ice and fire  
Cast your eyes on the ocean  
Cast your soul to the sea  
When the dark night seems endless  
Please remember me_

_Though we share this humble path, alone_  
_How fragile is the heart_  
_Oh give these clay feet wings to fly_  
_To touch the face of the stars_

_Breathe life into this feeble heart_  
_Lift this mortal veil of fear_  
_Take these crumbled hopes, etched with tears_  
_We'll rise above these earthly cares_

_- Loreena McKennitt -_

* * *

_**(Edward's POV)**_

"It won't be long now…" Alice whispered as we stood around the room – waiting; hoping. At Jasper's insistence, we had moved Ben from his house and relocated to our home in Forks. Bella was hesitant, believing that it would be better for him to awaken in familiar surroundings, but Alice convinced her that we could put him in Angela's room and that he would be soothed by her lingering scent.

Bella stood closest to the bed, flanked by Jasper and me. Alice stood behind us, searching her visions for Angela while keeping tabs on Ben's condition. My eyes wandered the room as I tried to make sense of the jumbled thoughts flashing through Ben's mind. He was grasping at memories, trying to dull the pain he was obviously feeling with glimpses of happier times. I smiled at his recollections of Angela – there was no doubt in my mind of how much he truly loved her. I hoped it would be enough.

Carlisle and Esme had set off in the wee hours before dawn, following the direction that Alice had been able to give them from her visions. Angela had made a decision, a terrifying one, and after much deliberation, we knew that the only ones who had any hope of convincing her against this choice were our 'parents.' Jasper had argued that he should be the one to go…knowing his ability would be able to rein her in, but in truth, his gift was needed here. We had no idea how Ben would react to his new life, to the choice we had made for him. Jasper's expertise would come in handy as our newest brother regained consciousness.

Jacob checked in periodically, but never stayed too long as he understood that his presence was somehow messing with Alice's visions. I could sense his internal battle – his inbred hatred for what we are, yet his undeterred devotion to my wife and to Ben was forcing him to question his role in the pack. Honestly, I was stunned that he had made the choice he had; he had condemned his best friend to an eternity with his sworn enemies.

"It's time." Alice's declaration came in unison with the increased tempo of Ben's heart as it made its final attempt to hold onto his previous life. His thoughts remained a collage of memories, Angela being the focal point until the one last frantic thump of his heart and then silence.

I felt Bella's hand slip into mine as she reached back for me, needing comfort as she waited to face the newborn she had sired. The past few days had been difficult for her and it still amazed me that she had such control. I remembered how difficult it had been for me to stop when I turned Angela and knowing that Bella was able to when she was barely more than a newborn herself was simply astounding.

_Be ready for anything, Edward._

I nodded slightly at Jasper, acknowledging his unspoken warning. Experience had taught us that we could not solely rely on our gifts in this kind of situation. I fought back a smile as I remembered Emmett's awakening – he had been like a crazed lumberjack on speed and we hadn't had Jasper's mood control to tame him, but we had done it all the same.

Bella's tightening grip on my hand brought my thoughts back to the present and I focussed on Ben's thoughts. They were clearer now, although more bewildered as he took inventory of his body's obvious changes and he recalled the horrific suffering of all he had just gone through. As if in reflex, his eyelids snapped open and a guttural snarl escaped from his lips. In an instant he was on his feet in the corner of the room, crouched like a predator and eying Bella as if she were his prey. _Let the games begin._

* * *

_**(Ben's POV)**_

_A tingling sensation overtook my body and I rejoiced that I was finally at peace. I burned no more._

I lay there still, terrified that the slightest movement would re-start the agonizing flames that had consumed my being for what seemed an eternity. I remembered all the times I had practiced this same exercise as I attempted to will my body to sleep as a child. I would begin with my toes, imagining them turning to stone and would continue up my frame, numbing each part of my body. I very rarely made it past my knees, the sheer boredom of not moving lulling me to unconsciousness.

The numbing that I had experienced as a child however, had somehow been replaced by a strange new sensation. I had never felt more alert, more powerful – it was as if I was in tune with each cell of my body. As I processed this new development, I also realized that I was not alone. In an instant, my eyes flicked open and I was on my feet, unsure of how I had moved so quickly or why I felt as if I were in treacherous danger. The room spun around me, a mirage of faces that I could not pull into focus and I heard myself growl in response.

"It's alright, Ben. You're safe." My head spun towards the wondrous sound and I stared in stunned disbelief. _It couldn't be…_

"Bella? Bella Swan?" It was her turn to be shocked.

"You remember me, Ben?"

"Impossible!" I cocked my head quickly to the side and met the questioning eyes of Edward Cullen. _Edward Cullen? And Alice and Jasper? How on earth are they all here and why do they look exactly the same as they did when we were at Forks High? _

"You know who we are, Ben? You remember us?" I nodded, immediately realizing that I hadn't actually spoken their names.

"And you can read my mind?" I asked nonchalantly, although inside I was reeling from the thought and still overwhelmed by their actual presence.

"Unbelievable." Edward turned to Jasper. "He has perfect recollection!"

"That must be his gift! See Edward! I told you this would all work out!" I couldn't help but smile at the exuberant melody of Alice's voice.

"I would hardly say that we are out of the woods yet, Alice!" he hissed.

Unsure of what he meant by the comment, but interested in more pressing matters, I returned my focus to the girl who stood in front of me miraculously, even though she had apparently taken her own life 15 years previous.

"Bella, I thought you were dead! Jacob thinks you're dead! I don't understand…" A sense of panic came over me and I sucked in a breath of air, immediately overcome by a fragrance so pure and sweet that I thought my heart would combust. "Angela! Where is Angela?" Her whereabouts and safety became my sole focus, blurring everything else.

As quickly as it had come, the panic washed away and I found myself pinned to the ground. _What the hell?_

"Ben, we have a lot to tell you, but you need to try and remain calm, okay?" Alice was kneeling before me, her gentle hands cupping my face. I nodded in response, mesmerized by her butterscotch eyes, so similar to Angela's. "He'll be ok, Jazz."

Jasper released his grip and pulled me to my feet. I turned to thank him, but was stunned into silence as I took in the criss-crossing scars that marred his features. _What the hell happened to him since high school? Was he in an accident?_ I turned my gaze back to Alice, not wanting to be rude.

"Okay, I'm as calm as I'm going to get. Can someone please tell me what is going on?"

Alice turned to Bella. "It will be fine."

Bella nodded and sat on the edge of the bed, facing me. I watched her carefully, grasping swiftly that although she was the girl I remembered – she had changed in many of the ways that Angela had. "You're a vampire." I spun quickly. "You're all vampires!"

Again, I felt an overwhelming sense of tranquility wash over me. I shook my head in frustration, wanting answers.

"Yes, Ben. We are vampires and so are you." My head shot up in surprise and I stared at Bella, unable to digest what she had just revealed. She looked at me sadly. "I hope you can forgive me someday." I didn't speak, my curiosity piqued as she began to recount everything that had happened. I learned of the Cullen's history and their gifts and realized how so many things made so much more sense now. I had always found the Cullens intriguing, yet their presence un-nerved me as well.

I learned of Alice and Jasper's unique gifts, connecting at once that the calm I now felt was his way of controlling the situation. But even his powers were pushed to the limit when Bella began to explain about what had happened fifteen years previous. What the redheaded demon from my memories, a monster I now knew as Victoria, had done to Bella's father, to my friends and most of all to my beloved Angela.

Sensing that I had taken in almost all I could handle on that topic, Bella changed the subject, leading us away from the past and to how I was now one of them. I listened warily as her voice grew softer and more distant as she forced out the tale. When she finished, she couldn't even look at me, her frame taut with emotion. I watched in silence as Edward moved to sit with her, her body almost melting into his as he embraced her. I remembered how genuine their love seemed to me in school, yet it was nothing compared to the adoration that poured from them now.

I looked down at the floor, needing to clear my head and allow Bella's words to sink in. I was a vampire. Jacob, my best friend, had begged Bella to change me into this even though vampires were his sworn enemy. Jacob, my best friend, who had also been lying to me for years. I wanted to be angry with him. I wanted to rip him apart for deceiving me, yet I couldn't. I couldn't because he had only been trying to protect me. I couldn't because he had possibly given me back a chance at a life with Angela. _Angela, where is she?_

Edward's eyes met mine as that question came to the forefront of my mind. Although his face was deadly calm, I sensed that he was masking something, only to have it confirmed by the immediate flush of all emotion that swept over me. I snarled in reaction and glared at Jasper only to see him shrug in indifference.

"Sorry Ben, but we need to keep you relaxed until we at least get you fed." His words brought the burn at the back of my throat into focus and I closed my eyes as I fought back the overwhelming thirst that struggled to consume me. I knew from what Bella told me that I would need to hunt, but not yet. Not until I had answers.

I stared stonily at Edward as he and Alice appeared to have a silent conversation. Sighing, he nodded and turned to me.

"Ben, can you tell us what you remember from just before waking up here?"

Nodding, I recounted my day spent waiting for Angela to reappear. I told them of Leah's visit, pausing as I recalled the awkward kiss on the couch. Realizing that Edward had most likely already read it in my mind, I trudged forward, telling them everything. As the words poured out, I realized what had transpired. _Leah shifted to protect me while I was trying to protect Angela. _

Edward nodded solemnly. "And now Angela is on the run and Leah is chasing her. Neither of them know that you have been changed and both are assuming the worst."

I closed my eyes understanding immediately how ominous the situation truly was. "They'll kill each other." I turned to Alice. "Can't you see anything? Can't you find a way to stop this?"

"She's trying, Ben." Bella spoke up, grasping Alice's hand in hers. "The wolves block Alice's visions so she can't get an accurate read. Carlisle and Esme have gone after her, but…" I cut her off.

"We have to do something!" I paced the room frantically. I knew Jasper was watching me closely, but thankfully he was allowing me to feel something at least.

"The best thing we can do, Ben, is keep you safe. Carlisle and Esme will reach Angela and once she knows that you are here, with us…it will all work out. I'm sure of it!" I wished that I could believe Alice's words, but I knew she was whitewashing things – presenting the best scenario she could put together from her broken visions.

Burying my head in my hands, I tried to ignore the wave of despair that was surging towards me. She was so close, at the tips of my fingers, but I feared that she was going to be swept away from me yet again…only this time to a place that I would never find her.

* * *

_**End of Chapter - so what do you think of Ben's gift?**_


	19. Livin' On the Edge

_**A/N – And I'm back…my apologies once again for the delay in posting. My poor beta, changedbyEdward, returned from her MUCH needed vacation extremely ill so she was incapacitated. Thankfully she is on the mend and most likely cursing me for going on a bit of a writing bend while she was sick. The good news is that she has two more chaps in her hand to beta with another on the way so things should be on schedule for a bit! Much love and gratitude bb, for all your hard work!**_

_**It was an even split on whether or not Ben's gift was special or not and although I agree with some of you that it isn't anything spectacular – I would imagine that someone like Edward who only has glimpses of memory of his human life left, or Alice who recalls nothing of her time as a human would think it pretty amazing that he has perfect recall. But it was very interesting to have your feedback – so thank you!**_

_**As always, Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and its characters. No copyright infringement intended.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_**Previously in CWYWF…Carlisle and Esme had left to find Angela while Edward, Bella, Alice and Jasper stood guard waiting for their newest family member to awaken to his new existence, Ben. As he takes in the new world around him and learns that he is now a vampire, he reveals his gift – perfect recall of his human life and we see that his feelings for Angela have only intensified…

* * *

**_

_**There's somethin' wrong with the world today  
I don't know what it is  
Something's wrong with our eyes**_

_**We're seeing things in a different way  
And God knows it ain't His  
It sure ain't no surprise**_

_**We're livin' on the edge  
We're livin' on the edge  
We're livin' on the edge  
We're livin' on the edge**_

_**There's somethin' wrong with the world today  
The light bulb's gettin' dim  
There's meltdown in the sky**_

_**If you can judge a wise man  
By the color of his skin  
Then mister you're a better man than I**_

_**- Aerosmith -

* * *

**_

_**(Leah's POV)**_

Clouds of earth flew as my claws dug deep into the ground beneath me. I kept to the shadows of the cool forest while a rare morning sun beat down on the mountainside. I had lost track of how many miles I had run, focussing solely on the distance between the vampire and me, whom I knew was now tracking me.

I felt no fear as I trekked further into the wilderness. I had not changed my mind and felt at peace knowing that my time on this planet was coming to an end. I pushed thoughts of Ben to the back of my mind, consoling myself with the knowledge that I would pay for the crime I had committed and the bloodsucker would spend an eternity full of regret. I ignored the snag that seemed to pull at the edge of that thought, which was knowing that Ben would not want his one true love to endure such a fate.

She was close…the tingling sensation I always felt when a leech was near buzzed through my fur. I welcomed it, but continued my journey - knowing I had not yet reached the place where I wanted the battle to unfold. My limbs ached from exhaustion and I wished for a spot to curl up and rest, but I recognized that wasn't an option.

The wind shifted and rolled through the trees and brought with it an essence that stunned me to the core. The scent swirled around me and I inhaled deeply, lost in a confounded cloud. A soft moan broke me from my daze and I ambled through the underbrush to investigate.

Pushing through the trees, I found myself in a small meadow, void of the foliage that seemed to populate the area. I moved forward little by little, fearing I was being drawn into a trap until I saw him. My heart rose to my throat, my first instinct being that it was one of the pack, but as I moved closer I realized that I'd never seen this person in my life. If I had, I would've known. An indescribable current rushed through me and I allowed myself to be pulled closer to the boy that lay motionless on the ground.

A low moan escaped his lips again and my eyes scanned his body quickly, realizing immediately that he was somehow injured. The grass rustled beneath my feet and his eyelids flickered slowly and then shot open, taking in my presence. Terror masked his visage and he struggled to move away from me. I understood his reaction instantly and tore into the trees, shifting to my human form and dressing as swiftly as possible.

Dashing back into the clearing, I dropped to his side and gently pushed him back to the ground as he tried to drag himself away from the impending wolf attack. "It's okay, where are you hurt?" I softened my tone as much as I could, the fear constricting in my soul while I once again searched his body for damage.

He moaned and weakly fought my hold before giving in. "Save yourself…wolf," he croaked before losing consciousness.

I grimaced at his comment and set myself to work, tenderly searching his frame for injury. I closed my eyes tightly and fought back the tears that strangled my throat when I discovered the gunshot wound to his side. Shifting his body gently, I stared at the blood that continued to pool beneath him. Finding another wound on his back, I realized the bullet had most likely gone right through. From my limited medical knowledge, I surmised that was a positive, trying to recall an episode of ER where Dr. Carter had been shot. A knapsack lay off to his side and I searched it, finding a bottle of water and what appeared to be a clean shirt.

I had no idea what I was doing, but I knew I had to at least stop the bleeding if he had even a chance of surviving - and God, how I wanted this boy to survive. I pushed the blood-soaked t-shirt he was wearing up and away from the wound and tore the clean one into strips. Uncapping the water, I poured some onto one of the pieces of fabric and wiped around the wound, unsure how I should actually wash the abrasion. He groaned as I rolled him over and repeated my actions to the exit wound and then took a piece of the fabric and balled it up sealing off the hole. I knew it wouldn't stop things for long, but hoped it would at least give me some time. Moving him back onto his back, I packed the entry with another piece of the t-shirt and then covered it with another.

Sweeping my hand against his forehead, I felt for fever. His skin was hot to the touch and I knew that I needed to think of something - fast. Shifting, I moved to stand only to find his blistering hand gripping my arm and his eyes wide open, staring at me in wonder.

"Don't go. Please don't leave me!" he whispered and I shook my head, dropping to the ground beside him, his hand gripped firmly in mine.

"Shh…rest now. I'm not going anywhere." He nodded and his eyelids dropped quickly, long dark lashes sweeping against his bronze skin. _Who the hell is he? What is he doing here? How did he get shot?_ The questions poured through my mind as I sat tightly against his still frame, checking the wounds every few minutes and praying that the bleeding would somehow stop.

His breathing was shallow but steady and I sat, chained to his side. How was it even possible that on a day that I had accepted my fate and readied myself for death that I would find my sole reason for living? Fear consumed me as the familiar tingle grew stronger in my body. I shook involuntarily, my wolf begging for release to protect the one I already loved with all my heart and soul, but I fought back the urge.

I was about to do something that I never would have conceived possible. I was about to make a deal with the devil - or should I say vampire?

* * *

_**(Carlisle's POV)**_

We were silent as we ran through the woods, both lost in our thoughts and concentrating on the lingering scent of our youngest daughter. The sun rose further in the sky, mocking us with its knowledge that we would be forced to remain in the shadows and towering trees. Thankfully, Angela and Leah seemed to be heading further and further into the wilderness, so we would not have to be quite so cautious.

It was impossible to determine from their lingering scents who was the hunter and who was the prey as their paths criss-crossed over each other and faded, lost to the morning dew and the more recent tracks of the pack as they gave their own chase. Sam had since called them all back without explanation, a move that had infuriated Jacob initially, however even he had given up, opting to remain closer to our home knowing that Ben was close to waking.

I didn't need Jasper to sense the anxiety that Esme was feeling as we made our way through the heavy brush. Her emotions only seemed to amplify mine as I fought to ignore my fears of being too late. Angela's emotions ruled her life as a vampire, most likely a result of the trauma she sustained in the last few days of her human life. She fought to overcome so much in the short time she walked this existence with us and it terrified me to think that it all could be lost.

Images of the past fifteen years drifted amongst these fears and I clung to those memories, hoping they would not be the last we would have with our Angel. Our Angel. I smiled as I remembered her telling me that she had thought Esme was an angel watching over her while she burned and that she hoped that she had earned a set of gilded wings as well. To say she was devastated when I revealed her true fate was an understatement, and the first year was trying, not just for her, but all of us. She was so angry and rebellious – she made Rosalie look like a saint! But as time went on, she learned to channel her anger and truthfully became a stronger person for it.

Although Edward sired her, she seemed reluctant to seek guidance from him – I often wondered if it was because they had been in school together or if it was because of his gift. I never asked, but simply accepted it as the norm when she would come to speak with me regarding concerns or questions she had. We developed an easy rapport, having come from similar backgrounds and I cherished having a kindred spirit to discuss theological ideas and our nature.

I also appreciated the warm way with which she welcomed Esme into her life. Although all of 'our children' considered her as the matriarch of the family, Angela was the first to fully accept her in that capacity – filling a gap that I knew Esme had felt all of her vampire life. A sense of dread rippled through me as I considered the effect of what losing Angela would do to us all, but specifically my beloved wife.

A gasp from Esme's lips forced me from my thoughts and I turned to face her, realizing at once what had caused her outburst. She stared at me, terrified, her breathing at a standstill as the wind whipped the delectable scent of fresh human blood our way.

Picking up our pace, we moved quickly through the overbrush towards the source, fearing the worst. I caught her hand tightly in mine and we pushed forward over the last few miles, the scent growing stronger with each step we took.

"Thank God it's you!" The voice carried over the open field as I found two dark eyes scowling at me from across the small meadow.

"Leah?" I raised my hands and moved in slowly, Esme following my lead.

"A little help here, Doc?" My eyes left hers and she shifted slightly, allowing me to see the body that lay beside her. "He's been shot. I did my best to stop the bleeding, but..." Her hand tightened on his and I watched her struggle to keep her emotions in check.

"Stay back, love. There's quite a bit of blood and I believe he may be her imprint so she could react to us both moving close," I whispered softly to Esme as I squeezed her hand.

"Be careful," Esme responded and I nodded. Focussing on Leah, I took in her watchful glare as I moved towards her slowly.

"All I want to do is help, Leah. Neither of you are in any danger." I spoke calmly as I made my way across the gap between us.

Her body stiffened slightly, but she nodded in response. "I know."

Kneeling beside the boy, I took in Leah's attempt at first aid. "You did a great job here, Leah. He would already be dead if you hadn't acted so quickly." Her quick intake of breath confirmed my suspicions. "He's your imprint, isn't he?"

"That's none of your business, Leech!" She snarled and moved between us and I backed up, my hands raised again in peace.

"Leah, I meant nothing other than I understood your concerns." I watched her closely and moved back towards the boy, detecting his erratic heart rate and shallow breathing immediately. "We need to get him to a hospital as soon as possible, Leah. He has lost a lot of blood and has gone into shock; his body is doing its best to support his major organs and his brain with the blood that remains, but it can only do that for so long. He needs a blood transfusion and an IV as soon as possible, as well as a CT scan to check for internal damage."

"Well we can't exactly call 911 now, can we?" Her sarcasm came across weak and I sensed her panic that he would not survive.

"No, we can't. And I would suggest you running with him, however he would never survive that kind of movement. I do have one suggestion, but I fear that you will not like it."

Sighing, she pressed her hand to his cheek and studied him closely. "What Doc? You want to call more of your coven up here?"

I cringed at her mocking tone. "Actually, yes, I want to have Edward and Jasper come up here with a long spine board. If we secure him to it carefully, they could move him down closer to civilization and then we can get him the proper treatment." She growled softly and I paused only for a moment. "You have to trust me, Leah. He doesn't have much time to play with."

Ignoring her instinct and focussing solely on the individual lying beside her, she nodded hurriedly. "Okay."

I stood and moved to Esme's side. Flipping open my phone, I was surprised to find a signal. Speaking quickly with Edward, I explained the situation as clearly as I could, telling him where he and Jasper could find us. Moving back towards Leah and the boy, I urged Edward to hurry but approach with caution, only to have my words cut off by a shriek, the ripping of clothing and Esme's gasp. Spinning in reaction, I dropped my phone and locked eyes with my beloved wife as I found myself standing between an incensed vampire and a monstrous silver wolf.

* * *

_**End of Chapter - your thoughts?  
**_


	20. Vengeance

_**A/N – Well here we are again…thanks for all the great feedback! I know I suck at answering reviews, but really appreciate the support Angela's story is receiving!**_

_**Thanks to my wonderful beta, changedbyEdward for working her magic yet again.**_

_**You all know the drill. Steph owns Twilight. No copyright infringement intended.**_

_**Previously in CWYWF – **Leah planned to battle Angela and lose – ending her own misery and forcing the vampire to live an eternity of regret. Her plan shifts however when she finds an injured man deep in the forest and imprints. Carlisle and Esme, while searching for Angela to let her know that Ben is okay – stumble on Leah and attempt to help her imprint. Carlisle calls Edward and Jasper for help and then finds himself caught between an angry wolf and vengeful vampire…_

_**FYI - No lyrics this time…if anyone can think of something, please feel free to message me, but I am at a complete loss and wanted to get this chap posted!**_

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

I glanced around the forest floor, disgusted as I took in the carcasses of the small herd of deer that I had drained without thought. I hadn't been thirsty, but knew that I would need my strength for the battle that lay ahead and instinct had plainly taken over. Ashamed, I buried the remains quickly even though 'out of sight, out of mind' would clearly not work for me.

The task complete, I set off running – following the stench of my canine enemy. Rushing over tundra and rock, I fought to keep my mind clear of thought. It would not help my cause to wonder what might have been or how my family would react to my decision and ultimate demise. Severing ties would make it all easier in the long run. They would finally come to terms with the knowledge that no matter how I tried, I could never truly live up to their expectations. By my seeking revenge alone, I hoped the wolves would allow the treaty to remain intact. My fight was with the one they called Leah and only her.

On and on I ran, following the trail she had left. It seemed too easy – as if I were being baited like a mouse to a trap. It didn't matter. The end result would be the same. She would pay for what she had taken from me. I did my best to ignore the blatant twist to my existence. How bizarre that I now sought revenge for the death of a loved one – yearned for it. Revenge had been the reason for the end of my human life and it would also be the end for my immortal one.

Visions of Mike and Victoria plagued my mind and I cursed them both as I recalled the terror that I had felt at their hands. Although the memories had dulled through the burn and passage of time, I still felt the loss of all they had taken from me. My family, my love, my life – all in the name of revenge. _How am I any better?_ I pushed the question from my mind – I would not, for one millisecond, allow myself to consider the monster I now hunted equivalent to the human life that was robbed from me.

Focussing solely on the trail before me, I charged through the trees - the stench growing stronger with each step I made. The wind changed direction and with it, an intoxicating aroma filled the air, almost overriding the horrid dog odour. Venom pooled in my throat and I stopped breathing as the familiar red haze of bloodlust shadowed my mind. Rage coursed through my body as I considered the possibility that Leah had injured yet another innocent human. _How many lives will be lost due to this mongrel's carelessness? _

Furious, I picked up my pace, unsure of what I would do once I reached the source. I was relieved that I had hunted so recently, knowing it would help me curtail my bloodlust although it was not foolproof. I only hoped that my quest for revenge was stronger than the desire for the fragrant wine I thirsted for.

Relying only on my hearing to guide me, I closed in on the monster I chased and its victim.

The next few moments were a blur as I heard the tearing of clothing and the familiar snarl of my enemy. Blinded with fury, I charged into the clearing – vengeance for the life before me and that of Ben's spurring my attack. A gasp from behind came too late as I launched myself towards the silver-haired monster and I froze with panic as I slammed into Carlisle with such force that the world seemed to shatter around us.

"Leah, stop!" Esme's voice commanded from somewhere behind me and I prepared myself for her attack, but it never came. More voices filled the air as I lay prone on the ground, my eyes tightly closed as I feared the worst.

"Angel?" Carlisle's voice was close and my eyes stung with venom, full of tears I could not shed. Relieved, I opened my eyes to see him kneeling over me.

"Carlisle, I'm so sorry!" I cried out, sitting up and hugging him tightly. Gently pulling from my embrace, he stood and pulled me to my feet. "Why are you here?" My eyes scoured the area, taking in Jasper, Edward, Esme and a stranger strapped to a stretcher at their feet. Leah was nowhere in sight. "She's gone!" I spat, venom pooling with renewed anger.

"Leah's not far, Angela," Carlisle stated firmly. "But this needs to end, right now."

As relieved as I had been only moments ago, I glared in defiance. "DO NOT speak her name to me!" I moved towards the edge of the clearing, prepared to flee as I knew they could stop me if they wished.

"This is not what Ben would want, darlin'." I scowled at Jasper as I felt my anger diminish slightly.

"Stop it, Jazz! And you have no right at all to tell me what Ben would want!" My hands clenched with anger at my sides as I fought to control myself with my family. The anger that fuelled me now felt so similar to that I had experienced during the first two years as a vampire and I knew the destruction and havoc it could cause.

"You're correct, Ang. I don't have the right. Perhaps you would like to hear it from Ben yourself."

Simultaneous gasps filled the air, as I stood frozen, staring at the cell phone in Jasper's outstretched palm.

"He's alive?" Leah questioned as she strode back into the meadow, dressed in a ripped t-shirt and holding the waist of a pair of jean shorts that seemed to swim on her. She didn't look at me, her voice quavering as she knelt by the stretcher at Jasper and Edward's feet.

"In a way, Leah." Carlisle spoke softly as he watched her carefully. She stared back at him defiantly. He met her glare head on. "Jacob asked for it to happen." Her face softened and she nodded, accepting his words.

I followed the conversation silently, unsure of anything more than they were telling me that Ben was safe. A warm hand grasped mine and I turned to find Esme standing with me. "Let's go home, sweetheart," she said softly. Then, turning to Carlisle, she said, "We will see you back at the house?"

Nodding, Carlisle kissed her gently and squeezed my shoulder. "Esme will explain everything, Angela. We'll see you back at home soon."

I followed Esme towards the tree line, looking back. Leah's eyes met mine, but we didn't speak, an uneasy truce having formed with the knowledge that Ben was okay.

* * *

_**(Esme's POV)**_

We ran silently towards home, my daughter lost in thought as the miles faded behind us. She had barely spoken a word since the revelation about Ben and I wondered if she truly grasped what had happened. Although Leah seemed to understand immediately that Ben had been changed, I didn't believe that Angela had come to the same conclusion.

Seeing a small break in the trees, I slowed my run and she did the same. "Why don't we take a bit of rest over there?" I pointed to a downed log and she nodded, knowing that we didn't need to stop, but accepting my request all the same.

She sat on the log, her eyes focussed on the scattered leaves at her feet. "You are so quiet, Angela. Please talk to me."

Her shoulders shook and I placed my hand under her chin, raising her head so her solemn eyes met mine. "Darling, please?"

"How can you even bear to be near me, Esme? After what I did…" Her words were soft and sad.

"Oh, Angel." I moved closer, wrapping my arm around her shoulder and only squeezing tighter when I felt her tense. "It's all right. You have nothing to be sorry for."

Angela was shaking and shrieked, "I attacked Carlisle! I could have killed him! I was so angry…" she finished, her voice trailing off.

"My dearest girl…I think you give my husband far too little credit." I chuckled when she looked at me bewildered. "He knew exactly what he was doing when he met your attack, Angela. Just because he is a gentle soul doesn't mean that he will not fight when required. You obviously don't remember what happened when we had to face Victoria, but Carlisle can hold his own. And I saw the look on your face when you realized he was there – you had no intention on hurting him." I shifted on the log to face her. "I do want you to promise me however, that you will always remember what happened today. Anger and revenge, although sometimes warranted, can only cause more pain and damage in the long run, Angela."

She stared into the trees. "I understand Esme, but would you just walk away if it had been Carlisle?"

"Carlisle is my life, Angela. I can't tell you how I would react and hope that I never have to be in that place. I can't even imagine a life without him, but I would also have to consider the affect my choices would have on my children." I reached for her hand, and tucked it in mine. "I know that I'm not really your mother, but you and your 'siblings' _**are**_ our children. How could I make a choice like that when I would be deserting all of you? Carlisle would never forgive me for such a mistake and honestly, I could never forgive myself."

"I'm so sorry, Esme!" Angela flung herself around me, tearlessly sobbing into my shoulder and I knew the point of my statement had struck home. As much as I could not make that choice, she needed to consider what she would be doing to the rest of the family with her actions.

I rubbed her back, waiting for her to calm. We needed to discuss Ben.

"How is he?" Her question came small and childlike and I chose my words carefully.

"When we left to look for you, he was unconscious, but safe from immediate harm." I took her hand in mine again. "Angela, he was badly injured when Jacob found him…" I felt her body tense beside me.

"What are you trying to say, Esme?"

"Darling, he would have died. Jacob called Bella and begged her to save him."

Angela's head shot up in horror and she stared at me, her eyes tormented. "No, please no…" I hugged her to me as a new wave of sobs tore at her tiny frame.

"Shh, Angela. It will be all right. I know what you are feeling and I understand - I do….but darling, it will all work out." I rocked her gently as her body trembled from the realization of all that had happened.

Pulling from me, she stood and paced – her words pouring out in torrents. "It's all my fault, Esme! How will he ever forgive me? If only I had left…if I hadn't gone to him…"

"Angela!" My voice was firm as I stood and spun her to face me. "You will not do this! We cannot control everything around us! I watched Edward make these same mistakes and I will not allow you to do the same!"

Stunned into silence, she stared at me.

"I know that you are distraught over what Ben has lost, but dear heart…have you considered what he has gained?" She didn't answer so I trudged on. "He has suffered so much sadness in his human life. Jacob has told Bella of the profound loss he felt when his parents passed so closely in the past year and darling, Jacob told you himself what your disappearance did to him!"

"It still doesn't mean he would want to live this life, Esme. The life of a monster." She stared off into the forest.

"Is that what we are, Angela? After all this time, do you truly believe that is all we are?" When she didn't answer, I moved to her side. "Perhaps you should give Ben the chance to let you know how he feels before you make all the decisions. Surely you have learned that much from witnessing first hand the damage one person's foolish choices can make. I know your human memories are vague, but I don't believe you have forgotten all of what Edward's rash reactions did to Bella."

Her eyes met mine and I saw the fear, but I also saw a tiny flicker of hope. "What are you waiting for, child? Take a chance and see where fate leads you." Capturing her hand in mine, I guided her back on the path for home.

* * *

_**End of chapter – reviews are always welcome!**_


	21. A Whole New World

_**A/N – And here we are again…now I know y'all are going to chuckle at my lyric choice, but truthfully it just suits for Ben. I claim full responsibility for this one! Mucho love to my wonderful beta, changedbyEdward (who will most likely want to throttle me for the lyrics – LOL). Next chapter is going to her for beta shortly so will try and update again in a week. Thanks again for all your support! **_

_**Stephenie owns it all – I am just playing with her characters! No copyright infringement intended.**_

* * *

_**Previously in CWYWF…Angela is on the hunt to make Leah pay for Ben's demise, but the tables turn when she attacks Carlisle in her lust for revenge and then learns that Ben has survived. Carlisle, Jasper and Edward head one way with Leah and her injured imprint while Esme leads Angela towards home with a heart to heart along the way…**_

* * *

_Unbelievable sights  
Indescribable feeling  
Soaring, tumbling, freewheeling  
Through an endless diamond sky_

_A whole new world_  
_Don't you dare close your eyes_  
_A hundred thousand things to see_  
_(Hold your breath, it gets better)_

_I'm like a shooting star_  
_I've come so far_  
_I can't go back_  
_To where I used to be_

_A whole new world_  
_Every turn a surprise_  
_With new horizons to pursue_  
_Every moment red-letter_

_I'll chase them anywhere_  
_There's time to spare_  
_Let me share this whole new world with you_

_- Peabo Bryson/Regina Belle - _

* * *

_**(Ben's POV)**_

I would like to say that I enjoyed my first hunting experience as a vampire – that I was a natural – a cunning hunter. But nothing could be further from the truth – in fact, if I had to judge my skill…well, the word hopeless comes to mind.

Bella and Alice did their best to soothe my bruised ego, telling me that they had all done the same the first few times they had been out, but it was hard to believe after watching all four of my companions take down their prey effortlessly and without even a wrinkle to their clothing. Edward and Jasper both chuckled when I finished, obviously noticing that the new shirt Alice had given me was ruined.

My first instinct had been disgust when they explained what I would have to do to survive in this new existence, but at the first thump of a beating heart my revulsion was replaced by a ravenous thirst that I feared would never be quenched. I listened to their instruction impatiently, the steady pulsing rhythm calling to me, and I lunged the moment Jasper and Edward released their hold on me. Even the exhilaration of the wind beating against my face as I tore across the field like an Indy racer was dulled by the call of the blood.

The world seemed to fall away as my teeth sunk into the soft flesh of the mule deer I had somehow taken down. Warm and tangy fluid flooded my throat and I closed my eyes, losing myself to the experience. All too soon, it trickled to a stop and I stood slowly, my senses returning, and I stared down at the magnificent creature I had murdered with regret.

The tension eased almost immediately and I looked up to find Jasper watching me warily.

"I would like to tell you it gets easier, but it doesn't." He gathered the remains and placed them in a shallow pit, partially covered with rotted logs and dead leaves. "We do our best to only take what we need and leave the remains for the rest of the wildlife to take care of."

I nodded, unsure of my voice as I continued to process all that had happened in a few short minutes. I had gone from being someone who had done nothing more than a little fishing to taking down a large animal with my bare hands and draining it of its life's essence like I would have drained a glass of milk after Mrs. Weber's cookies.

"Maybe it's better that it doesn't get easier," I mumbled as we made our way back towards the rest of the group.

Jasper cocked his head, eyeing me curiously for a moment and then nodded. "Maybe you're right."

I had assumed that would be the end of our hunting expedition for the day, but I was sadly mistaken. Twice more on our return home, I was overcome by my thirst and the mesmerizing cadence of a creature's heartbeat. Another deer and a small fox both met their end before I felt somewhat satisfied.

The fox was the culprit that caused the most damage to my clothing and Jasper and Edward both found it quite hilarious that something so small could cause me so much stress. I scowled at them, but accepted their teasing for what it was – knowing they were doing everything they could to keep me from freaking out.

My thoughts were erratic at best and it took great concentration to focus on one given thing at anytime. Only two things remained steadfast in my mind - my thirst and Angela. Once I had temporarily resolved the first issue, the second became front and centre and I noticed the tighter circle that formed around me as we made our way back towards the house.

Edward's cell phone ring forced us all to pause and a wave of calm washed over me as we stood waiting for him to end the call. Even with Jasper dulling my reaction, I could feel the panic rising as I realized that Carlisle and Esme still had not found Angela and now needed Jasper and Edward to join them.

I followed helplessly as they gathered what they needed. Alice and Bella collected supplies from Carlisle's office, while Edward and Jasper found the portable stretcher Carlisle had requested.

"Why do they need this? I thought they were looking for Angela? Why are they wasting time?" My questions were like gunshots as I paced the room while they organized the supplies.

"Ben, they are looking for Angela. They found Leah so Angela won't be far. I realize that you don't know Carlisle other than when he worked here in Forks, but there is no way he would leave someone injured – it would be against everything he stands for," Jasper said as he reached for Alice, kissing her gently as they readied to leave.

"Well I'm going with you." I moved to pick up some of the gear.

Bella's hand covered mine. "Ben, you can't. I understand, I do – but there is no way that you can go with Jasper and Edward – I can't even go."

I tried to argue, but Jasper cut in. "Ben, do you remember what you said to me in the woods? The guilt you felt? The person that Carlisle is helping has been shot - I don't need to draw you a picture."

His words were an echo as I remembered the unquenchable desire that had come over me simply from the beat of a deer's heart. I gasped as the feeling renewed and along with it the regret of taking another life – especially a human.

Stumbling back, I grabbed onto the stair railing – the wood shattering to dust as I fought to gain control. My thoughts began to clear and I shuddered at the power that I now understood the blood held over me. Blinking, I met the worried eyes of Alice and Bella and realized that Edward and Jasper had me pinned from behind.

My throat burned uncontrollably, but I understood why. "Will it always be like this?" I asked as they released me.

"No. Not always." Bella took my hand and led me towards the couch. "The first year is the toughest, but you will always have to be diligent, Ben – mistakes can happen in the blink of an eye and that's something you don't want to live with."

"Why does that sound like the voice of experience talking?"

"It wasn't her fault," Edward spoke softly from behind us, "I made some foolish mistakes and Bella paid the price for them."

Bella smiled lovingly in Edward's direction. "Always the protector." She moved quickly from her seat and kissed him soundly, watching as he and Jasper made their exit. Returning to the couch, she continued, "It was shortly after I was changed. Edward had returned from his self-inflicted exile…" I raised my eyebrow in question and she smiled gently. "I guess I need to back-pedal a bit." Settling back into her seat, she called to Alice who joined us quickly.

As the two of them began to weave their tale, I relaxed and listened carefully, realizing that they were doing their best to keep my mind occupied while we waited for word. Although the frustration still lingered, I allowed myself to be lulled by their words and wait. After all, what other choice did I have?

* * *

_**(Jacob's POV)**_

I sat at the treaty line and watched them approach, noticing at once the gear they were carrying. I fought the urge to shift and stood stiffly as they came to a stop on the other side of the line.

"Who's the stretcher for?" I fought to keep my voice neutral. I didn't want to be best buddies or anything, but I knew if I had any chance of seeing Ben again, I would have to be on my best behaviour.

I waited for the bloodsucker to respond, sensing at once that he was taking a wander through my mind. Seeming satisfied that I didn't plan to cause any problems he said, "We've heard from Carlisle and Esme. They found Leah."

Cutting him off, my skin bristled as I choked out, "What happened? What did they do?"

"They've done nothing." The other parasite spoke up and I felt myself immediately relax. I knew he was controlling my reaction to an extent, but I had to know what was going on so said nothing.

Edward continued. "Leah came across someone in the woods. He was injured – a gunshot wound. She did her best to stop the bleeding and Carlisle and Esme found them soon after, but Carlisle can't really help him up there. He needs medical attention immediately and can't be carried down without a stretcher. We can get to them more quickly if you will allow us to cross your land."

"Yeah, that's not going to happen!"

"Jacob, don't be a fool. Someone is up there dying."

Contempt rolled off the leech, but I had to give him credit for not acting on it. "How do I know that one of you aren't just gonna drain this guy dry and then kill Leah? She's after your girl, isn't she?"

"You should know by now that we do not live that way! If you really believed that any of us would hurt a human, you would never have asked Bella to change Ben. Either way, we are wasting precious time here. From what Carlisle told me – he thinks this guy may be Leah's imprint – are you willing to let him die?"

"Leah imprinted? Wait, how do you know about imprinting?"

"It's called researching your enemy, mutt!" Edward snapped angrily. "Now are you going to let us through? Or…"

"Let them through." Sam Uley stepped out from the trees and took Jacob's side. "Jacob, you have already made it clear that you trust these 'people,' otherwise you would never have made the decision to allow Ben to be changed. Your grandfather was a wise leader and he knew he could trust this group of pale faces, just as you know in your heart that you can do the same."

He was right. I hated what Bella had become, but I trusted her. I knew that she would make sure that Ben followed the lifestyle they had adopted and that was why the decision had been so easy. Nodding, I stepped aside and motioned for Edward and Jasper to follow. "I'll go with you as far as the other side of Quileute land so that the rest of the pack understands you have our permission."

Edward nodded and thanked Sam as they crossed over the treaty line that had been made so long ago.

We were silent for awhile, moving through the trees as we quickly made our way north.

As we approached the Quileute border, Edward said, "He's awake, Jacob." He slowed and looked at me. "You made the right decision."

I scowled slightly, hoping he was right. "How's he doing?"

Jasper chuckled a bit. "Well he survived his first hunt, even though his clothes didn't!"

I rolled my eyes. "He never was much of an outdoorsman." I laughed, even though the visual of their hunting practice made me a bit queasy.

"Was he angry?" That was what bothered me the most. I had selfishly made this decision for him. Sure, I had used the pretence that he would have the chance to find happiness with Angela, but that was only part of it. He was my best friend. I couldn't let him go…any more than I could let Bella go.

Grimacing, I saw Edward's cocked eyebrow and I knew he had read my thoughts. "I couldn't let her go either." His admission stunned me. "I understand your feelings for her Jacob, I do. It doesn't have to mean I like them, but I do understand."

I shrugged it off. "Doesn't matter anyway. She was never mine to have."

"No, she wasn't." It was my turn to cock the eyebrow, but he chuckled and raised his hands in mock surrender. "I'm just saying, if she was the one – you would have imprinted on her."

"I suppose, but it doesn't mean we wouldn't have been happy together."

"Maybe so, but what would have happened if you had found your imprint afterwards? What would have happened to Bella then?"

And there he had me. He read minds. He knew from Sam's mind what had happened with him and Leah when he met Emily. Even though I would like to believe that if it had been me, things would have been different. There was no way of knowing. I might never know.

Edward studied me carefully. "I hope it does happen, Jacob. I don't expect us to ever be friends, but I know what it means to live a life of loneliness. I did it for ninety plus years before Bella walked into my life and I wouldn't wish it on anyone...not even you."

I laughed as we reached the border. "Thanks, I think." I motioned for them to go on ahead. "You can go on from here. You have permission to come this way on the return trip as well." I turned back towards the reservation, but couldn't resist one last remark. "That is, as long as you don't snack on the way down!"

I could still hear their growling chuckles in the distance as I made my way back down the trail, and I laughed in response. Perhaps there was hope for us all yet, but then again Edward had never answered my question.

_Will Ben forgive me for the choice I made?_

* * *

_**End of Chapter - I promise what you are all waiting for is just around the corner...reviews just might speed up the process! ;o)**_


	22. Something Like That

_**A/N – And here we are again…I believe a few of you have been waiting for this! :o) Thanks to my lovely beta, changedbyEdward for making this look pretty! She also saved you all from my horrible lyric – picking…this one is all hers!**_

_**As always, Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight world and I am just playing in it. No copyright infringement intended.**_

* * *

_**Previously in CWYWF – Ben recounts his first hunting experience and learns that Angela has been found. Jasper and Edward head out to help Carlisle, running into Jacob along the way and Edward and Jacob have a 'civil' conversation. **_

* * *

_Well it was five years later on a southbound plane__  
__I was headed down to New Orleans__  
__To meet some friends of mine for Mardi Gras__  
__When I heard a voice from the past__  
__Comin' from a few rows back__  
__And when I looked, I couldn't believe just what I saw__  
__She said I bet you don't remember me__  
__And I said only every other memory_

_I had a barbeque stain on my white tee shirt__  
__You were killing me in that miniskirt__  
__Skippin' rocks on the river by the railroad tracks__  
__You had a suntan line and red lipstick__  
__I worked so hard for that first kiss__  
__And a heart don't forget something like that_

_Like an old photograph__  
__Time can make a feeling fade__  
__But the memory of a first love__  
__Never fades away_

_- Tim McGraw –_

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

We travelled quietly on the final leg of our journey home. I could feel Esme's watchful eyes on me and I knew she was concerned that I might flee, but she really had nothing to worry about. It was impossible for me to run – the need to see him with my own two eyes was too great to even consider running.

The house came into view and we slowed to a walk, my stomach churning with butterflies as all the possible scenarios played over and over in my mind. _Will he remember me at all? Will he still feel the connection we had so long ago? Will he hate me for what he had become?_

As if she sensed my fears, Esme turned and pulled me into a fierce motherly hug. "Everything will be fine, Angela…just believe." Clasping my face in her hands, she kissed me gently on the forehead. "I am going to go ahead in, dear, just follow when you're ready." I nodded, appreciating that she was giving me a few moments to collect myself. I was surprised that she trusted me, but knowing that the all-seeing pixie would alert her if I changed my mind was most likely enough to convince her to do so.

I wandered towards the river and sat on a large boulder, looking out over the rippling current. The air was crisp and I inhaled deeply, taking in all the smells that surrounded me – wishing for a calm that would not come. I wondered silently where the brave girl that had headed alone to Scotland a few weeks previous had disappeared to. That courage would have come in handy now.

Closing my eyes, I breathed in again and froze. The scent of cedar and pine had been replaced by an aroma so fragrant, yet so terrifying. Nutmeg, leather and a splash of honey wisped around me, intoxicating me.

"Angela, look at me."

The voice so familiar, yet so foreign, sent an electric current up my spine and my eyes fluttered open in reaction to its velvet command. He stood before me, almost within reach, but I remained still on the rock – taking in the magnificent being facing me. Words cannot describe how it felt to see him so vibrant, so alive after living with the haunting memory of his battered body etched in my mind.

His flawless olive skin shimmered in the sunlight, sparkling prisms of colour trailing along his hands and bare forearms. The sleeves of his butter-toned shirt were unbuttoned and shoved up his arms and it hung untucked with the bottom button of his Levi's peaking from beneath the shirttails.

Flustered, I raised my eyes quickly and found him watching me curiously – a hint of a smirk teasing at his mouth - and I knew he had caught me. His deep scarlet eyes were the only evidence of his newborn status. While they were stunningly beautiful, I would be happy to see them take on the butterscotch hue that accompanied our 'vegetarian' diet.

His hand reached out tentatively, tucking a loose tendril behind my ear and I leaned my cheek into the palm of his hand instinctively. His thumb brushed against my skin and I felt more alive from this simple touch than I had in fifteen years.

"I've missed you, Ang. So much." His voice was like warm honey and I closed my eyes, relishing the sweetness of it.

There were so many things we needed to talk about, yet I had no words. It couldn't really be this simple, could it? Even though I wanted to believe it could, I finally opened my eyes and pulled away from the warmth of his touch.

He stepped back, sensing my hesitancy. I smiled tentatively, hoping he realized that I was indeed happy to see him, even though I had pulled away.

Finally, I found my voice. "How are you coping with all of this? You have to know that I never wanted this for you." I regretted my words as soon as they were out of my mouth even though it was the truth. _Who would wish this existence on anyone? Especially on someone you loved?_

* * *

_**(Ben's POV)**_

The wait had been excruciating. Alice and Bella had done their best to keep me busy – telling me tidbits of their lives along with filling me in on some of the benefits of being immortal, other than the obvious of course.

In truth, I didn't need convincing, but I was hesitant to tell them so. I wasn't sure how well it would go over to announce that I was absolutely thrilled to be a vampire. Don't get me wrong – I know the diet definitely wasn't the greatest, but there were so many perks – being with Angela for all eternity at the top of the list – how could I not be anything less than ecstatic?

I was torn from my thoughts as footsteps approached the house. I glanced at Alice and Bella anxiously and their tentative smiles made my heart soar. Angela. She was finally here.

"Esme is coming in alone, Ben," Alice said softly. "Angela is with her, but she's staying outside."

"Why? What does that mean?"

"Don't worry yourself, Ben. She is just taking a few moments to gather her thoughts." I turned to face the new voice and was once again astounded by the utter beauty of the Cullen women. Esme smiled warmly and approached me with arms wide open. "Welcome to our family. I'm so pleased to see you looking so well."

I hugged her and whispered my thanks, immediately understanding the reason she was considered the Cullen matriarch. Her warmth and grace seemed to brighten the room as she hugged both Bella and Alice before taking a seat with them. She quickly filled us in on what had happened, but I could barely focus on her words – my thoughts consumed by the woman outside.

I moved towards the picture window, my eyes scouring the yard for any sign of her, but she was nowhere to be found. I growled in frustration, startling myself, and Alice giggled behind me.

"She's down by the river. Just go to her already!"

I could still hear the three of them laughing as I rushed out the door and around the house, following the well-worn path that led to the riverbank. I slowed my pace as I rounded the final bend, spotting her immediately. She sat turned partially away from me watching the rippling water flow by.

My feet refused to move as I took in the splendour before me. The detailed memories I held from the few moments we had spent in the cemetery together were dull reflections of her utter beauty. Her chestnut hair tumbled in a cascade of waves over her shoulder making her porcelain skin appear even more delicate. I watched the sun's kiss dance along her jewelled skin, various colors seemingly in battle for their moment of brilliance.

She was truly mesmerizing.

I had been over this moment in my mind a thousand times since I had come through the burn and most likely several thousand before that. I wanted it to be beautiful, memorable – a Bogey and Bacall moment. But now as I stared at what I hoped was my eternity – I had no words.

"Angela, look at me," was the only sentence I seemed to be able to form, but in the end it was all I needed. I could feel her watching me, her warm caramel eyes sweeping up my body and finally meeting my gaze. I couldn't help the smirk that fought to explode on my face – I was thrilled beyond words not only to be standing there with her, but also to see the undeniable desire that was written across her face. We had been denied so much in the past fifteen years and to know it was now there right in front of us for the taking was indescribable. I couldn't resist touching her, my hand tingling with electricity as I brushed my fingers against her hair and touched her cheek.

I couldn't believe how much joy I felt from one simple touch and my heart ached with loss the moment she pulled away_. Can't she feel how much I long for her? How much I want to take her in my arms and never let her go?_

I reined in my emotions, understanding that before we took that step there were definitely some conversations to be had, some decisions to be made, and Angela's first words to me as we stood there were proof of how much we needed to resolve before we moved ahead with our forever. At least I hoped it would be 'our' forever.

"How are you coping with all of this? You have to know that I never wanted this for you." I could see the pain and regret on her face as she spoke, her voice so gentle and timid – as if she feared my response. There was so much pain in her eyes and although her words had stung, I understood immediately why she felt so much regret.

"Ang, baby, this is not your fault." I realized my slip the moment it was out of my mouth, but it was as if we were swept back in time. The hint of a smile that appeared on her gorgeous face gave me hope that we would get through this. "I mean, there's no denying that it will take getting used to, but the pros far outweigh the cons Ang – especially if it means forever with you." She stared at me silently, her eyes popping in shock at my obvious word vomit.

I looked out over the river and searched for a way to lighten the moment. _Way to take it slow there, Ben! How do I even know that she would want forever with me? _

My mind came to a standstill and the ground seemed to slip as Angela threw her arms around me and her lips met mine. Momentarily stunned, I did nothing as her mouth moved against mine and her fingers locked together around the back of my neck. A light growl from the back of her throat was all I needed to realize that this was really happening. I pulled her against me, her body soft and warm, and lost myself in the kiss I had been waiting for so long for.

Her teeth grazed my bottom lip and I succumbed to her demand, allowing her tongue access. Our kiss deepened and I heard another growl, realizing this time it came from me. Swinging her up into my arms, I moved us back to the rock she had been sitting on and pulled her onto my lap – our lips never parting.

It would have been so easy to take her right there and then, claim her as mine forever and let everything else simply slip away, but I knew that we had some healing to do before I could let that happen. Pulling away slowly, I cupped her face in my hands and pressed my lips against her forehead, her eyelids, her nose and once more against her lips. She stared up at me silently, her eyes black with desire and I once again fought the urge to give in.

Pressing her cheek into my hand, she closed her eyes and breathed in slowly. I watched in wonder as she relaxed under my touch and when she opened her eyes again, they were caramel once more. I smiled and brushed her cheek with my thumb, pulling her close to my chest.

"I can't even tell you how long I have dreamt of this moment, Ang." I ran my fingers through her dark hair, her scent swirling around me with each stroke. Memories that I had locked away rushed to the surface and I smiled as I remembered our first timid kiss and how much we had both been through since then.

I felt her palm against my cheek and our eyes met. "Hey, where did you go just now?"

"I was remembering the first time you asked me out." Her hand dropped from my cheek and I saw the question in her eyes before she asked.

"How can that be? Why on earth would that be one of the things you would remember?"

I caught her hand in mine and brought it to my lips, smiling as I realized she didn't know about my little gift. "Well, I would definitely remember that moment, Ang, no matter what, but it turns out I remember everything. Jasper and Edward figure that is my 'gift.' I told them I had a photographic memory as a human and it seems to have carried over."

"So you remember everything?"

"Yep. I kind of freaked them all out when I came out of the burn because I knew who they all were and had pretty well figured out what had happened to me."

Angela stared at me for a moment, puzzled. "I can't believe how easily you are taking this all in, Ben. I mean, you died and became a vampire and it doesn't even seem to faze you!"

I sensed her bewilderment and knew it was warranted. Bella and Alice had told me some of what had happened when Angela was taken, although they had changed the subject rather quickly when they realized I was about to tear the house apart. They also knew it was Angela's story to tell and although I dreaded the thought of making her re-live those memories, I knew it was only one of the things we would have to discuss before we could truly move on.

Pulling her close I pressed my lips to hers again, wanting nothing more than to freeze that perfect moment for all eternity.

* * *

_**End of chapter - **peeking out from the computer** Was it worth the wait?**_


	23. After All This Time

_**Where do I even begin to apologize? I can't…all I can promise is that I won't be one of "those" authors that starts a story and then leaves it to die…the end is near and I hope this chapter will at least show you all that I haven't deserted CWYWF…**_

_**In case the next chap doesn't make it up before the holidays, please let me take this moment to wish you all a safe and happy December no matter what you are celebrating…much love to my darling beta, changedbyEdward, for not giving up on me completely!**_

_**Previously in CWYWF…**_

_**Esme and Angela returned home; Ben and Angela were finally reunited and shared their first kiss as vampires…and now we continue…oh one more thing…LEMON ALERT! :o)**_

* * *

_There was rain_  
_That we outlasted_  
_There was pain_  
_But we got past it_  
_There were last goodbyes still left unspoken_  
_There were ways I should have thrilled you_  
_There were days when I could have killed you_  
_You're the only love my life has known_

_And after all this time  
You're always on my mind  
Hey I could never let it end  
'Cause my heart takes so long to mend  
The dream that keeps your hopes alive  
The lonely nights you hold inside  
And after all this time  
You're always on my mind  
I still want you_

**_- Rodney Crowell –_**

* * *

_**(Angela's POV)**_

"Stop gloating Alice, it doesn't become you," I scowled into the mirror as my sister-sprite flitted around me, adding the final touches to what she was deeming her latest masterpiece. Bella sat on the bed behind us, chuckling quietly to herself and I extended my evil eye to include her. Catching my glare, she fought back another giggle and returned to her reading.

In all honesty, I knew that I owed everything to Alice – even though I wasn't quite ready to give her the satisfaction. The past few weeks with Ben had been the happiest moments I had spent since becoming immortal. I couldn't really believe how easily everything had fallen into place.

My worries that he would be angry about his new existence were completely unfounded – in fact, he truly seemed to flourish as a vampire. He had adjusted to our lifestyle with little difficulty and although we had yet to really test his bloodlust – Carlisle and Jasper both seemed to believe that he would most likely be able to withstand human interaction within months, if not weeks.

As pleased as I was that it was so easy for him to adjust, it frustrated me that I seemed to be the black sheep of the family. Other than one mishap Bella had in her first days as a vampire, she had a perfect record and was able to move around the general population with ease – even though she still doubted her strength. The rest of the family had not drank human blood in decades, if ever, and now Ben was well on his way to holding as clean a record as Carlisle and Rosalie.

"All done!" Alice's declaration summoned me from my brooding and I stared at my reflection, appraising her hard work. My dark hair was pulled up into a French twist and secured with two jewelled combs that matched my amethyst-coloured blouse perfectly. My eye makeup had a smoky hue and was more pronounced than I usually wore, but I had wanted something a bit more defining and she had come up with the perfect result.

"Thanks Ali – it's exactly what I wanted."

Nodding, she smiled coyly. "Of course it is! And you're welcome, but don't even ask because I still won't tell you what Ben has planned." Her eyes lit up and she moved to the closet, grabbing a charcoal Pashmina from the depths and wrapped it around my shoulders, securing it with a diamond brooch.

"Really, Alice? A scarf? Are you afraid of me catching cold?" I questioned sarcastically, but altered my tone quickly as I spotted the reflection of Bella's rapidly shaking head in the mirror. I knew without a doubt that she was right…there was no sense arguing with Alice and it was better to be a willing Barbie – it meant you escaped more quickly.

"Perfect!" Alice grinned triumphantly, then pouted. "I really wish you would change your mind about the jeans though, Ang."

I shook my head vehemently. "Uh-uh Ali…I agreed to the blouse only because you "accidently" spilled water all over my sweatshirt, but I am staying in my Levis and boots….that was the deal when I sat down to have my hair done, remember?"

"Fine…fine!" She waved me towards the door as she set her sights on Bella. I laughed as I headed down the stairs in search of my date. Instead, I found Jasper standing idly by the staircase, a single red rose in hand.

Grinning mischievously, he handed me the flower and I brought the bloom to my nose, inhaling its rich perfume. Raising an eyebrow, I looked over at him as he linked his arm with mine. "The flower is beautiful, Jazz but I'm not so sure Ali will appreciate you giving me flowers."

Patting my hand gently, he beamed at me. "Now Darlin', as much as you know I love you…I am only the messenger and escort this fine evenin'."

I laughed at his over the top Southern charm and played along. "Well, my thanks to you then Cowboy and let's mosey along so we don't keep my suitor waiting."

My curiosity grew as Jasper silently led me through Esme's garden and over the hill leading to the river. Heading left, we moved into the trees and I gasped in wonder as we came to a small clearing decorated with Chinese lanterns and flower petals. Ben stood waiting for me in the centre of the clearing and I barely noticed Jasper releasing his hold as I took in the effort he had put into giving us a magical evening.

Realizing Jasper had already left me, I took a deep breath and made my way across the small gap that separated me from my mate. _My mate. _It was hard to believe that the boy I had fallen in love with so long ago was actually the only one who could make my life as a vampire whole, but it seemed that destiny had played that hand.

The gravitational pull I had felt in the cemetery when I first saw him again was multiplied a thousand fold each time his eyes met mine and I was overcome with a peace that I had longed for from the moment my life as a vampire had begun. To think that we had somehow known, even as mere teenagers falling in love for the first time, that we were somehow meant to be, was astonishing and I wished that I was able to remember more of our time together other than the few glimpses my memory had chosen to store away during my change.

Ben took the last few steps to meet me and brought his hands up to cup my face, his warm lips dotting each cheek with a chaste kiss. I melted into him, my arms encircling his waist and he held me tightly to him, his chin resting gently against the top of my head. I buried my face against his chest, the scent of soft leather and spice offering a warm ambience against the evening air.

"What were you so pensive about, Angel? You seemed a million miles away," Ben questioned quietly as he gently pulled away, taking my hand and leading me closer to the blanket he had sprawled out. I curled my legs beneath me and laid my head against his shoulder, staring quietly into the flames of the campfire he had built.

"I was just thinking how lucky I was to have you here with me; for us to be able to be together again." I smiled up at him. "Thank you for this…it's beautiful."

His hand caressed my cheek and I leaned into his palm. "I wanted us to have some time together, just the two of us. I hope that you don't mind camping out?"

I chuckled at the thought – knowing that since we didn't require sleep – we were really just going through the motions of the outdoor experience, but I couldn't think of anywhere else I would rather have been and I told him so.

"I wanted to talk to you about something, Ang…something I have been thinking quite a bit about." His hands gripped mine and I turned to face him, sensing the seriousness of the conversation.

"What is it? Has something happened?"

"No, no. I'm sorry…I didn't mean to scare you. I've just been thinking about some things and wanted to run them by you." He paused and I nodded for him to continue. "Jacob is coming to see me tomorrow. Actually Jasper and Edward are going with me to meet with him."

"Are you sure you are ready to face him?" I knew this was an issue he had been struggling with since coming through the change. He missed his friendship with Jacob, yet felt betrayed by all that the dog had hidden from him. He also wondered if there was any possibility of salvaging a friendship when they were now supposed to be "mortal enemies."

"I need some answers. I think we both do." I nodded again. "I also want to ask him to look after a few things for me."

This piqued my interest. "What kinds of things?"

He chuckled lightly. "Well some are for you to know later on, but actually there is one thing I wanted to ask you before I see him." He threw another log on the fire and pulled me closer to him so that I was curled against his lap, my legs criss-crossed over his. I snuggled closer into the cocoon he offered. "I would like to leave my house to your mother."

My fingers that had been idly playing with the buttons of his shirt, stilled. "But Ben - that is your home. I don't understand."

"You are my home, Angela. I don't need the house and your mother will need a place to live. I know that she hasn't had to move yet, but when the new minister arrives, where will that leave her? The twins are both heading off to college and will have their own lives to live and I just can't picture your mother in an apartment. I don't want to."

My heart swelled with even more love for this man and the gesture he was making. I pulled myself from his embrace and knelt in front of him, my hands cupping his cheeks. "I love you so much and I can't even put to words what this means to me – that you would think that much of my family – my mother. But how will you handle it? She won't understand…"

He grasped one of my hands in his and brought it to his mouth kissing it gently. "I think you give her far too little credit, Angel. Your mother is very perceptive and I believe she will accept the house willingly. I have a letter written, telling her that I need to go away for awhile, to find myself and that I could not think of anyone else I would want living there more than her. I have spoken with Carlisle and he had Alice create a fund for the house expenses under my name so she will have nothing to worry about financially. They also set up a "life insurance" payment that your father applied for without her knowing so she will be able to live out her days here in Forks quite comfortably."

I felt a huge weight that I had not even realized I was carrying lift off of my chest and I wrapped my arms tightly around Ben's neck – my lips searching blindly for his as my eyes stung with the venom I could not cry. "I don't know how to thank you." I mumbled against his skin as I pressed my lips against his chin, his jaw and finally his mouth. I felt his hands against the bare skin of my back as he pulled me even closer to him, my blouse slipping up over his hands as our mouths met in a frenzied kiss.

Straddled over his lap, I felt his desire for me as our kisses deepened, our tongues dancing together as we lost control. I giggled against his skin as I saw the Pashmina fly across the clearing, followed by the echo of my blouse ripping to shreds. I pulled back from him, startled, yet so hungry for more. His eyes were black as coal and I knew that we were about to cross a line from which there would be no return.

* * *

_**(Ben's POV)**_

I had planned the evening so differently, but the moment our lips met I knew I would not be able to resist. All my practice of slow and steady movement was forgotten as her silk shirt disintegrated in my hands. Angela pulled away and for a single moment I thought perhaps I had gone too far, but relief and desire surged through me as she slowly reached around and unhooked her lace bra. A growl escaped from deep within my chest as I watched the slip of material fall away from us and I pulled her back to me – the craving to taste her skin overpowering any chance of taking things slow.

My lips found their desire as I licked and kissed down her glorious neck, my hands cupping her pert mounds of perfection. I grinned against her skin as I heard the soft moan that escaped her lips when I brushed my thumbs against her nipples. She leaned back and I lowered my head to take one nipple between my teeth as I rolled the other bud between my fingers. Her moans deepened as she moved against me and I clasped my hands behind her back, sampling each jewel with my tongue as she ground against me. Her hands moved up my shoulders and clenched briefly as her hips danced over my erection, her wanton eyes meeting mine.

Gone was the insecure teenager that had blushed at each awkward move I made so many years before. I allowed her to take the lead as she pushed me down against the blanket, her hands slipping beneath the hem of my shirt and then sliding up my chest, popping buttons as she went. I ran my fingers into her lush ebony locks as she pressed kisses up the middle of my chest, her tongue darting out to taste each hardened nib as she passed. I raised my hips and bucked against her as she continued her assault against my skin, and she met my unspoken demand, standing and shedding her jeans and boots before she moved to unbutton my Levis. Her eyes never left mine as she teased me relentlessly, slowly pushing the denim down my hips until her hands feathered against my throbbing member. I gasped as she ran her nails gently down the shaft and then back again, pausing only for a moment against the tip. Unable to stand the frenzy building inside any longer, I took control, flipping us so that she was now beneath me.

My mouth found hers again, and our tongues battled against each other as her hands wove their way into my hair and she pulled me against her, soft whispers escaping between kisses begging for release. I traced the outline of her frame lightly with my fingers as I slowly moved down her body, tasting her succulent skin as I travelled. She whimpered when my lips found her hipbone and I chuckled, spreading her legs apart gently – my fingers teasing the sensitive skin on the inside of her thighs. My tongue made a lazy trail to her center and I kissed each lip tenderly before finally allowing myself a taste. Her nails grazed against my skull as her fingers tangled in my hair, gently guiding my mouth against her folds. Her velvet bud bloomed as my pace quickened and I drank in the sweet nectar that was offered, holding her to me as she quivered with her first wave of orgasm.

Angela's hands gripped at my shoulders and I allowed her to pull me back up until we were face to face. Rising up, her lips sought mine hungrily and I nearly lost control at seeing her enjoy the taste of her honey on my lips. Unable to wait any longer, I hovered over her as I positioned my swollen cock at her entrance. Her nails dug into my shoulders as I buried myself deep within her with my first thrust and then paused, allowing her a moment to adjust.

She sighed softly and raised her hips lightly off the ground, taking in even more of my staff. I pulled back gently and thrust again – quickly finding a rhythm that suited us both. Everything around us seemed to fade away as we danced together under the stars. I buried my face in her neck as we rocked together, inhaling her fragrance mixed with mine, building and building until I finally felt my body release and we climaxed together. I felt her arms tighten around my neck and she kissed my Adam's apple; my body still tightly joined with hers.

I rolled onto my back and she snuggled against me, her cheek resting against my chest as we both gazed up into the night sky. I felt her lips gently brush my ribcage and I pulled her to me, kissing her forehead. There were no words spoken as we lay together – none were necessary. We had finally come full circle, the sadness of our long separation a distant memory washed away by the consummation of our love.

* * *

_**End of chapter – was it worth the wait? **_


	24. Come Together

_**So...I am not going to say anything other than I am sorry it took so very long...here we are...the final chapter of Careful What You Wish For. I want to take the time now to thank each and every one of you that have taken the time to read this story and its predecessor, A Different Kind of Moon. I can not begin to express what each review, comment and criticism has meant to me. Being a part of the Twilight fandom has been wonderful and although I will still be lurking here quietly...this will most likely be my last fan fic for a while. I would like to thank my dear friend and beta, changedbyedward for being with me every step of the way...love you bunches bb. Hugs to you all and hope you enjoy the finale...xo**_

**_As always, Steph Meyer owns everything and I do not...forever greatful to her for the wonderful world she created and reigniting my passion for writing._**

**_Previously in CWYWF - Angela and Ben enjoyed a romantic interlude and Ben told Angela of his plans for the future..._**

* * *

_**(Jake's POV)**_

I wandered the clearing restlessly as I waited for Ben, Edward and Jasper to arrive. Paul and Embry had been quite vocal about me going on my own to meet "three leeches", but Sam had stepped in and told them it was my decision. Although I would be outnumbered, I knew I had nothing to fear. Even though I was sure Ben was more than a little pissed at me; Edward and Jasper were coming as much for his protection as mine.

The sickeningly sweet aroma that would surely set a kid on a permanent sugar high signaled their approach and I reigned in the wolf that struggled to come to the surface. It was important that Ben saw me as his buddy and not a vicious dog that was enemy to his kind. _His kind._ I still couldn't believe the choice I had made for him when it came right down to the final moment…I only hoped that he saw it as a gift rather than a curse.

I watched as they entered the clearing, Edward leading the way. They stopped suddenly and I suspected Ben had changed his mind, but they resumed their approach almost immediately.

"I was beginning to think you weren't going to show." It probably wasn't the most welcoming greeting, but it was all I could muster as I stared into Ben's dark blood-red eyes. His face was expressionless, set in stone, and a small part of me sullenly wondered if there was anything human left of my friend.

"Sorry, Jake. We stopped to hunt along the way." Edward cleared his throat and fought back a smirk. "You will have to give Ben a minute – he wasn't quite prepared for your…scent."

"I believe you mean stench, Edward," Ben retorted before I even had a chance to respond. "Jake, you just reek, man."

"Don't even go there buddy – at least I don't smell like funeral home flowers!" I jabbed back, hoping that it was going to be just that easy to fall back into our familiar ways.

Ben chuckled and then moved a little closer. "I would tell Edward and Jasper to take a hike, but they would stay within hearing distance anyway so I'll just go ahead and say what I need to with them here, all right?"

I nodded silently, immediately noting that the conversation had definitely taken on a darker tone. I wanted to speak up and apologize, but the words just wouldn't come so I waited for him to take the lead, hoping that I would be able to make him understand why I had done what I had done.

"Jake, I can forgive you for a lot of what has happened and I want you to know that I'm glad you made the choice you did, but what I can't get past…what I can't comprehend, is why you didn't tell me there was a possibility that Ang was alive?"

"Because she isn't alive!" The words slipped out before I could think and Edward and Jasper grabbed at Ben's shoulders as a growl ripped from deep inside.

"Jacob!" Edward's glare spoke loudly and I backed up a bit, backpedaling with my words at the same time.

"Ben, that's not what I meant, dammit. This isn't easy, ya know? What I meant was that she was no longer human and I didn't even know for sure that she was a vampire until I saw you all doe-eyed in the cemetery and then Bella confirmed it."

"Fine, but you knew about Bella!" Ben shouted.

"Yeah, I knew about Bella, but that didn't mean Angela was in the same boat and even if I had known I wouldn't have told you." I paused briefly but knew that I had to pull my foot out of my mouth shortly or they were gonna let him tear me to pieces. "Man, you don't know what it was like, having the girl I …" I shrugged at Edward, "the girl I thought I loved turned into a monster I'm supposed to hate with every part of my being. I struggled every day with what I had become, what Bella had become and the realization that I would never have her…that I never really did have her."

"You should have given me the choice, Jake!"

"How could I have given you the choice? You only knew what you did, because of that red-headed bitch and the fact that you were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Do you have any idea how many rules I broke that day? And the following days, answering your questions and telling you what I did? Sam nearly had my hide for telling you those things, but I couldn't lie to you. You were my best friend, Ben, and no matter what I couldn't lie to you about that."

_**(Ben's POV)**_

I wanted to be angry. I wanted to tear him to shreds for denying me the opportunity to find Angela earlier, but deep down I knew he was right. He didn't really know what had happened to her and even if he had been able to tell me about Bella, it wouldn't have necessarily led me to the conclusion that they were together. If things hadn't happened as they , I might have spent my entire life looking for a ghost.

The Cullens had made it quite clear to me from the moment that I awoke to this new life that the existence of vampires was a secret that must be kept; the one vampire law that could not be broken. I also knew the risk that Jacob had taken, not only when he acknowledged what I saw, but also in going against the pack and asking Bella to change me.

I looked up to find him staring at me waiting for a reaction. "Why did you do it, Jake?" When I saw the exasperation in his eyes, I reworded my question. "Why did you ask Bella to change me? If vampires are something you seem so hell-bent on destroying, why would you ask her to turn me into one?"

"I can't believe you're gonna make me say this." His discomfort was obvious, much to the delight of Edward and Jasper. "Not all bloodsuc…er vamps are monsters."

"I would so love to post this moment on YouTube," Jasper whispered to Edward, knowing full well that Jacob heard him.

Jacob scowled at my brother for a moment and then continued. "You have to understand that our first instinct as wolves is to hate your existence. I mean the only reason we change in the first place is because you exist. I hated what happened to Bella when Edward left and I hated vamps even more when people I loved and cared for…people like Charlie…started turning up torn apart. "

I nodded, remembering the details Edward and Jacob had shared about Charlie's death.

Jacob moved to a log and sat, his head hanging low as he continued. "Bella told me what happened with Angela and why she was changed. " His eyes found Edward's. "She also told me why you did it."

"It was not an easy choice, Jacob."

Jake nodded at Edward's comment and looked at me, his eyes full of sorrow. "I understand that only too well, but when it came right down to it, Ben…it was the only choice I had. I knew you could finally be happy. You're my best friend, man, how could I not want that?"

I moved towards the log where Jake sat and without hesitation, extended my hand. Jake stared at it for only a moment before grabbing and shaking it. The tension dissipated, Edward and Jasper nodded silently as I took a seat beside him on the log and moved into the trees, wanting to give us a sense of privacy to discuss a few things.

I told Jacob of my wishes for Mrs. Weber to have my house and how I wanted him to handle the arrangements for me. I handed him the keys to my new truck and told him that the transfer of ownership to his name had already been done so he couldn't argue, explaining that Angela and I planned to travel a lot and really had no need for the vehicle. He pocketed the keys without hesitation.

"So that means things with the two of you are good?" Jacob asked.

I looked at him questioningly, "Why wouldn't they be?"

"She must have been some pissed about the whole Leah thing, man," Jacob chuckled.

_Leah. I hadn't even thought to ask about her. _Seeming to sense my reaction, Jacob grinned.

"She's doing okay, Ben." He kicked a stone with his runner and glanced towards the treeline. "They released Matt from the hospital last Sunday so we really haven't seen much of the two of them since then."

We had learned a few details about Leah's imprint over the past few weeks. Matt Roberts, a geology student from British Columbia, had spent the past few months hiking the mountain range in Washington, taking notes for his thesis. He hadn't realized that he had wandered into an avid hunting area and after a thorough investigation the shooting was deemed accidental.

"So how did Leah explain the whole wolf thing?" I asked.

Jacob chuckled. "Turns out that Matt is a descendant of the Puyallup tribe and was quite aware of some of the old stories shared among the people. He was a little shocked at first, but took the news well and has adapted to the whole imprint thing quite well." He looked off again into the trees, almost wistful. "Thankfully Leah hasn't phased much so we don't have to hear all the details."

"You will meet her Jake…"

He looked back at me, nodding. "Hopefully someday."

* * *

**_…Two years later…_**

The moment had finally arrived. I stood nervously at the altar, Jake fidgeting at my side. I glanced at him quickly only to find him making eyes at his very pregnant wife, Melissa.

Elbowing him, he straightened up and quietly whistled through his teeth as we watched Angela approach. Dressed in a gown of ivory silk, she truly was an angel, her hair twisted into a fountain of curls embroidered with apple blossoms. In her hands she clutched her father's well-worn bible adorned with rosebuds and greenery. She smiled brightly first at Carlisle, who stood before us, then at me and I felt as if my quiet heart would explode from my chest.

Taking my hand, she turned back and leaned down to kiss the weathered skin of her mother's cheek. Mrs. Weber beamed, and put her hand over ours, never hesitating at the iciness of our skin compared to hers. What Jacob told her I would never know, but he had given my soon-to-be wife the perfect gift and I would be eternally grateful.

We turned to Carlisle and our forever began…

_The end_

* * *

_From the bottom of my heart...THANK YOU!_


End file.
